Sarah sat up and swung her legs over the side. Her wrists and ankles were sore from the ropes, but those wounds would fade. Her heart, however, was another matter. Yes, Jay and Riley claimed they wanted her, but once they left for another assignment, they’d probably forget about her. As fantastic as her experience with them had been, they’d only known each other a short period of time, and it took more than a harrowing experience to form a solid relationship.
Perhaps with some distance, she’d figure out what to do. Right now, she needed to pack. After purchasing her airline tickets, she’d hug them goodbye and leave. Or would it be better to just go now? She checked outside the room and spotted her car. Her dear sweet men had retrieved it from the clinic. God, this was so damn hard.
* * *
“If we ask Sarah to stay, what do you think she’ll say?” Riley asked as he and Jay slid into their rental truck and headed back to the motel.
Ever since they’d left this morning, Riley hadn’t been able to keep his mind off the whole idea that Sarah would be heading back to Washington without him. The General had asked him to be a member of the Pack and he’d agreed. To make it official, all he needed to do was call his office and resign.
“She’ll say she has to debrief in Washington. You know that.”
“Yes, but what about afterward?”
Jay shrugged. “That’s a tough call. I’ve told her how I feel, but you’ve been distant—especially last night.”
Riley glanced out the window. After they’d brought her back after the kidnapping, he’d withdrawn. Turning down her request to make love had been the hardest thing in the world, but touching her intimately one more time before losing her, would have devastated him. “I didn’t say anything because I was scared.” He glanced at Jay. “There. I admitted it. Happy?”
His shoulders slumped. “We’re all scared of being hurt, but get over it. The question is whether you love her enough to chance the pain of rejection.”
“I do. At least I think I do.”
Jay gripped the wheel tighter. “What the fuck does that mean?”
Acid burned a hole in his gut. “It means I don’t know what love feels like. I might be in love if it means I can’t stop thinking about her, my dick throbs at night when I’m not sticking it in her, and I want to spend the rest of my life protecting her.”
Jay laughed. “Well, except for your crude description of making love with Sarah, I’d say you nailed the definition of love.”
“If I tell her I love her, do you think she’ll stay?”
Jay glanced over at him. “How about we give her a few days to mull it over? We need to come up with a way for her to move to Florida. We can easily afford to support her, but Sarah’s not the type to sit around and knit.”
“No. Sarah is like us. She needs to be useful.”
Jay nodded. “You know what really sucks?”
A lot of things did. “What?”
“We never asked her what she’d do if she no longer worked for the Bureau.”
“I suggested she work for the General and she laughed, pointing out she wasn’t one of us.”
“That might be to her advantage.”
“I told her that.” Riley dropped his head back. “We are a real pair. Perhaps Sarah would be better off without us—or rather me.” Jay slammed on his brakes, propelling Riley forward, and he had to brace himself from flying into the dashboard. “What the fuck did you do that for?” He hadn’t seen an animal dart in front of the truck.
Jay faced him. He didn’t seem to care that anyone could round the corner and slam into them. “If you don’t stop your pity party and start acting like a man who wants Sarah, then I don’t want to be around you. Just so you know, I plan to pursue her. Can I be sure I’ll win her heart? Fuck no, but I’m going to try. Why? Because I’m her mate and I’m worthy of her love. If you can’t see further than your childhood circumstances then good riddance.”
Riley was unable to respond, mostly because he was pissed—pissed what Jay said was true, and pissed that he had sunk to a new low. “Fine.”
“What does fine mean?” Jay’s lips were pinched and his brows furrowed.
“For my future happiness, I will permanently ban all pity from my life.”
Jay glanced at the ceiling and pressed the gas pedal. “You better, but we have to let her go back to Washington, first.”
“I realize that, but we can’t give her too much time. We don’t want her to take on another assignment.”
“Trust me, she won’t.”