Lost in Barbarian Space(45)
“You okay, Colm?”
He grunted.
She took a bite of the bar and chewed. “You’ve been—”
“Out of control.” He shot to his feet, his hands on his hips. Then he spun, let out a small growl, and slammed his hand into the wall.
The ice cracked.
Her throat tightened. “We’re going to get out of here, Colm—”
“It doesn’t matter if I make it out, Honor.”
“I know you’re angry about something. Something to do with your father—”
“I don’t want to talk about it with you.”
That hurt. She swallowed. “With Kavon, then?”
“No. It is my problem to bear.” Colm pressed his palms against the ice wall.
She stared at his straining back. Unable to stay away from him, she stood. She pressed a hand to the corded muscles. “Let me help you.”
“You warm my bed, Honor. That is all.”
She took the hit, then she steadied herself, shaking away the sting. “Well, we haven’t made it to a bed yet, so I guess I warm your furs. But this has nothing to do with you putting your cock inside me, Colm. We’ve worked together on this mission, we’ve fought side by side and saved each other’s lives. I consider you a friend.”
He spun and grabbed her. She found herself with her legs wrapped around his hips, and her back to the ice wall. Only the fur kept her skin from the ice.
His hands were between her legs. He thrust a finger inside her. She arched, crying out.
“You are not my friend.” He kept thrusting one thick finger inside her, while his other hand jerked at the fastenings of his trousers. And then his hand was gone, replaced by his large cock. He slid inside her in one sudden thrust.
She made a choked noise. He slammed her hands above her head.
“We are—” his voice was so deep it was hard to understand “—well beyond friends.”
“You are so confusing, warrior. One minute you say I warm your bed, but when I say we’re friends—”
He thrust inside her again, his eyes turning a molten gold. “For now, you are mine.”
He kept thrusting, slamming into her in hard, jerky motions. It was quick, dirty, and fast. She felt her orgasm rising like a tsunami. When it burst, she reached down and bit Colm’s shoulder.
A second later he groaned, and spilled himself inside her. They stayed there, against the wall, both of them trying to catch their breath.
Then Colm moved, swinging her into his arms. He sank down onto his fur coat, and settled her in his lap. His big body surrounded hers.
“My nanami are out of control.”
She frowned, not understanding the deep edge to his voice. “That’s not normal? In a tense situation, doesn’t that often happen?”
“No. We learn to control them…always. But sometimes, a few people… We call it the nanami sickness. It causes people to lose control. It drives them crazy, makes them violent savages.”
She froze. “Your father?”
“Yes. Nanami sickness is usually inherited.”
Panic flooded in her chest. “How do you treat it?”
“There is no treatment.”
She spun, gripping his arms. “There must be something—”
“Nothing.”
Honor tried to calm herself. “What happens?”
“You lose all control. Become an angry, violent animal. No better than those creatures that were hunting us.”
The ragged tone of his voice made her want to cry. It was everything her warrior was against. She knew for him to hurt an innocent would kill him.
“So, what happens when—?”
“I will go north, to the Wastelands. No one lives there except the winter beasts.”
No one for him to hurt. No one to help him. And he would die there, alone. Knowing him, probably death by beast.
She touched his arm, the strong muscles there.
“Colm, we have excellent doctors on the Magellan. We have advanced tech—”
“There is nothing that can be done, Honor. Your doctors know nothing of our nanami.” He stroked her hair. “I will not be like my father. He did not live his life with honor. He stayed, too afraid to deal with the sickness. Instead—”
“He hurt the people closest to him.” She closed her eyes, her chest tight.
“Do not worry, my little warrior. You’ll be long gone when this happens to me.”
It felt like a laser blast to her heart. She didn’t want to be gone, and she didn’t want him to exile himself to die.
She hugged him closer. Then, over his shoulder, she spotted something in the ice wall.
“Colm, look.” She pulled back.
He turned and together they stared at the object frozen into the ice wall. They moved closer, and Honor pressed a hand to the icy surface.