I’d scooted to the end of the chair as he talked, held captive by this glimpse into my own life and death. I wasn’t sure how to feel about this new information—sadness? Regret? Confusion? All I had was loss and emptiness. “I had no idea about any of this.”
Gadreel looked stricken as he leaned forward as if to comfort me. “I’m sorry. Did Lucifer not tell you about this?”
I shook my head. “No, he’s been very sparse with details about my past lives so far.”
He rested a hand on my shoulder and offered me a weak smile. “I’m sure he would have told you this eventually. He’s been very busy lately with the attacks and all that.”
“What’s going on here?” Lucifer’s dark voice made me jump.
Gadreel jerked his hand back as if he’d been burned. I took in our shifted positions as I’d moved closer to listen to his story. Our knees nearly touched, and we both sat on the edges of our seats. Too close.
“Gadreel was just telling me about how he knew me in a previous life,” I said, as I scooted back in my seat again.
Lucifer stood in the doorway, and he took my breath away with how handsome he was, even doing absolutely nothing except filling out a black three-piece suit. “Is that so?”
I gestured toward my pile of books on the floor. “I’ve been reading up on angels and demons and mythology all day, but I still had so many questions. Gadreel was kind enough to share what he knew.”
Lucifer crossed the room and bent down before me, sliding a hand behind my neck as he kissed me hard. Then his dark gaze shifted to Gadreel. “You’re dismissed.”
His kiss left me breathless, and he spoke in a low, threatening voice, but I couldn’t figure out why. There was no reason for him to be jealous. I didn’t have any feelings for Gadreel. That was even more obvious after such a hot kiss like that.
Gadreel brushed past us, back stiff, and strode from the room.
“That was rude,” I said to Lucifer, crossing my arms. Days ago, I would never have spoken to him that way. Now? I’d lost all my fear of him. “Gadreel guarded me all day per your orders, and was just answering my questions.”
Lucifer considered me with his fierce gaze, but then bowed his head slightly. “I suppose I overreacted. When I came in and saw you two like that…” His face darkened again, his hands clenching into fists at his side. “I always suspected Gadreel had feelings for you when you were Lenore, though you claimed you were only friends. But everyone loved Lenore. Entire poems were written about you.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about that life?”
He reached up to touch my face as he gazed at me with sadness in his eyes. “That was your most recent life before this one, and sometimes the pain of losing you is still strong. It’s hard for me to speak of it, though I’d planned to tell you eventually. I’ll tell you about all of your lives, if we have time. There’s simply a lot of them to get through.”
I nodded, leaning into his light touch. “I guess that makes sense. I’m just eager to learn.”
“You always have been.” He hit me with a devastating smile, then stepped back. “Come.”
He led me across the room to one of the bookshelves, and his shadowy wings erupted from his back. With one powerful stroke, he lifted off his feet and hovered at a top shelf I hadn’t reached yet. He grabbed a small black book and lowered to the ground, his wings disappearing behind him.
He offered me the book, bound in black. “This was yours.”
I carefully took the tiny book, which was old but well preserved. Collected Works of Edgar Allen Poe. On the title page there was an inscription that read, “For my muse, my Lenore.” Underneath it was Poe’s signature.
I quickly looked up at Lucifer. “Is this real?”
“Oh yes. I’ve looked after that book for a long time for you.”
“Holy shit. I’m the Lenore. In The Raven?” I turned the pages to find The Raven and read the poem to myself, then repeated one line out loud. “A rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore, quoth the Raven ‘Nevermore.’”
Lucifer’s lips quirked up. “He wrote another poem about you too, simply titled Lenore. Poe was quite obsessed with you.”
“Wow.” I flipped the pages, which cracked with age as I turned them, and found the other poem.
“Hannah, please trust me on this. I plan to tell you about Lenore and all your other lives, but I know from past experience it’s better to introduce these things gradually, or otherwise it becomes quite overwhelming for you. Coping with past lives and being fated mates with the devil is a lot to ask of any woman.” He leaned forward and cupped my cheek. “Even one as extraordinary as you.”
It was overwhelming, but I had this urgent need to know too. I shook my head and closed the book. “I want to remember so badly. I often have these vivid dreams, and I always thought it was because I read so many books and had such a strong imagination, but now I’m wondering if it could be glimpses of my past lives.”
“It’s possible. I’m surprised you haven’t remembered more by now, or at least remembered me, but more should come in time.” He rubbed his hands together. “Now, we have two more nights of sin, and tonight’s is lust. Oh, you should see what I have planned.”
I held up a hand, as an idea hit me. “Hang on. You’ve picked the activities every night so far, but now it’s my turn.”
He blinked at me, cocking his head. “Your turn?”
“For days I’ve done everything you wanted, and yes, it’s been pretty incredible, but tonight we’re going to do what I want for a change.”
“You don’t even know what I have planned.” His fingers trailed down my neck, brushing the top of my chest like a tease. “Trust me, you’ll like it.”
I sucked in a breath and tried to control my desire. “I’m sure I would, but I need a break from this lifestyle. A little sense of normality amid all the madness of the last few days. Please.”
“Very well, I’ll allow you to choose tonight’s activities.” He sounded skeptical, and I sensed it was because it was hard for him to give up control after many lifetimes of being king.
I lifted on my toes and gave him a quick kiss. “Don’t worry. I’m sure we’ll both be naked by the end of the night.”
I was rewarded with a sensual grin. “Now that sounds more like it.”
20
Lucifer
“Here we are,” Hannah said, as a bell jingled above our heads.
I guessed she’d pushed a door open, but I couldn’t see because she’d instructed me to keep my eyes closed, in a voice that said she meant it.
“You can open your eyes now.”
She nudged my arm, but… Fuck, did I have to? I was deliberately keeping my eyes shut against the fear they might fall out once I opened them and saw wherever she’d brought me. If the stench of stale beer and too much cheap cooking grease—not to mention the undertones of puke and piss—were anything to go by, I definitely wanted to keep my eyes closed. Very firmly closed. Perhaps with a padlock.
I tried to grin, but it came out more like a grimace. “Are you sure we’re in the right place?”
“Yep, this is it.”
I took a deep breath, even though the alcohol in the air was so strong just inhaling it burned my throat, and opened my eyes. I looked around in apprehension. We were in some sort of seedy dive bar, the sort of place I would never visit on my own. The interior had neon lights that flickered and blinked, although due to short circuit rather than design. Far too many pool tables took up valuable seating space and an entire side wall was devoted to old slot machines, many with dark, cracked screens. Ripped vinyl seating seemed to be the order of the day along with dated plastic tables where the top coating was lifting and scorched.
An enormous man in dirty jeans and a leather vest—and nothing else—stumbled past us, and I glanced down at my Armani suit, feeling rather overdressed for the locale.
This was where she’d brought me? And they said I was a torturer.
“Is this truly what you chose for lust?” I couldn’t hold the question in any longer as I tried not to look as horrified as I felt. Of all the places in Las Vegas we could have gone to, she’d picked this dingy old bar?
Hannah laughed, and seeing her eyes sparkle with mischief was almost enough to make up for this wretched place. “Come on, let’s go order some food and drinks.”
She led me to the bar, and I admired her in those tight black jeans and that draping top, both of which came from her new wardrobe, though she didn’t stand out in this place like I did. I wouldn’t have chosen to spend any moment of my immortal life with these other human specimens, but if this made Hannah happy, so be it.
She hopped onto one of the red barstools, and I took the one beside her. I nearly rested my elbow on the bar and barely contained my yelp as I yanked away from the surface. More than one layer of dirt and grease graced the dark wood. Enough that my jacket sleeve might have never recovered from such close contact.
“What are we doing in here when you don’t even drink?” I asked Hannah.