Casteel held me tightly, closely, his hand continuously sliding up and down the length of my spine. I didn’t know if he even realized what kind of comfort his closeness or his touch brought. Maybe he did, and that was why he remained in the room even knowing that I could wake him at any point in the night. There were other rooms, other far quieter and definitely less complicated beds, but he was here. He held me, soothing my ragged nerves after chasing away the lingering horror of a night I wanted nothing more than to forget. He helped me forget while offering pleasure and bliss to replace the fear and hopelessness, and he did this while taking nothing in return.
I fell back asleep, into the darkness where I was just Poppy, and he was simply Hawke.
We were leaving.
For Atlantia.
Those dark, private moments in the middle of the night seemed like an eternity ago instead of mere hours as I took a too-shallow breath. I studied those with us. Naill and Delano were with Elijah, and I had no idea if they were in on the plan Casteel had concocted, so I remained quiet. I’d spent the better part of the morning stressing over how I was supposed to act. The concern that had faded in the aftermath of the arrival of the Ascended and everything else had now returned with a vengeance.
“Would you like anything else before we leave?” Casteel asked, and then I felt a slight tug on my braid. “Poppy?”
Realizing that he was speaking to me, I shook my head. “No. I’m fine. Thank you.”
Both Kieran and Casteel stared at me, and the silence stretched on so long that I had to look to see if they were still there. Looking over my shoulder, I found both of them staring down at me, their expressions near mirrors of perplexity.
“What?” I demanded.
“Nothing.” Casteel blinked. “You’re ready, then?”
I nodded.
Watching me as if I were a coiled snake about to strike, he extended his hand. I started to rise without accepting his palm but caught myself. A quick glance told me that the others waited near the door. Figuring that refusing such a simple gesture wouldn’t be a good start at convincing others that we were together, I placed my hand in his.
The contact of his skin against mine sent another charged jolt through me. My eyes flew to his, but there was no knowledge to be gained from his heavily hooded gaze this time as he helped me stand.
“Is everything ready?” Kieran asked.
“It is,” he replied. “Elijah thinks we’ll make it to Spessa’s End by the end of the week if we don’t make a lot of stops.”
“It’s doable,” Kieran agreed. “And advisable.”
“The people here have only a few days before the Ascended send others looking for her,” Casteel said as he reached between us, plucking up the edge of my braid. “They’ll send scouts and probably more knights.” Dropping my plait over my shoulder, he then reached for my satchel.
Kieran nodded. “Magda returned earlier this morning. She said she thinks most will be ready to travel in a day or so.”
“Good.” Casteel glanced down at me. Unsure what to do, I decided on silence as the best course of action. After all, it used to be second-nature, even though I’d struggled to remain quiet when I first donned the veil. Kieran thought I asked a lot of questions now, there would be a wolven-shaped hole in the wall in his desperation to get away from me if he’d known me when I was younger.
Sending me a curious look, Casteel started toward the others. Naill and Delano nodded in my direction, saying nothing. It was Elijah who spoke. “I haven’t gotten a chance to thank you for what you did yesterday—helping those who accepted it.”
Shifting uncomfortably, I cleared my throat. “I just hope I helped.”
“You did. Pain is the biggest obstacle healing faces, and you stepping in when you did is a big reason why we won’t be sitting around here for longer than we should.” A big smile parted his beard. “I also haven’t gotten the chance to congratulate either of you on the upcoming nuptials. To be honest, every day I half-expected to find the Prince sliced up in all the ways a man fears.”
I blinked slowly.
Casteel chuckled deeply. “You’re not the only one. I expected to be picking up pieces of myself.” He glanced down at me, his lips slightly parted. “But I was once told that the best relationships are the ones where passions run high.”
My brows started to pucker.
“I wonder who told you that,” Kieran said.
“It was me.” Elijah laughed as he clapped his hand on Kieran’s shoulder, causing the wolven to stumble. Skin crinkled around golden-brown hazel eyes, and even though I wished the topic was about anything other than this, I was happy to see him smile and laugh after what’d happened here. But it made me wonder if it was because he’d become so accustomed to the death that the effects weren’t long-lasting. “Told him that if a woman fights with that kind of passion and makes you work that hard to earn even a smile, then that’s the kind of woman you want by your side in and out of the bedchamber.”
My mouth opened, but I truly had nothing to say.
“I’ve always thought you had a wolven somewhere in your bloodline,” Kieran commented.
Elijah scoffed. “Told you before, there’s just piss and whiskey in my line.”
“Maybe that’s the real bloodline you descend from,” Casteel murmured as he led me past them.
I raised my brows but said nothing as we entered the empty hall and then exited out into the yard. The snow had stopped, but my breath formed misty clouds. I was so going to regret leaving my cloak behind, even soaked with the stench of Craven blood.
As we made our way to the stables, unease formed upon the sight of leaves that glistened like rubies in the sunlight. No one was out there staring at it this morning, but I could swear the blood tree had grown even wider than it had been the day before. Crimson hued sap still seeped across the snow in a network of thin lines of red, reminding me of veins or roots.
Three horses were led out already, their ears perked as a stable hand held their reins, nervously glancing toward the blood tree. Casteel walked us past them, where Setti waited inside the stables. The massive black horse had been named after the God of War’s warhorse. I used to think that the beautiful horse had big hooves to fill, but now, knowing the truth, I imagined Setti filled them just fine.
As we approached the horse, Casteel let go of my hand. My palm missed the warmth, which was something I’d never share. I walked up to Setti as Casteel walked around to secure my satchel to where his own bag hung. My gaze crawled across the barn, stopping on a pole with a deep groove. Knowing what had caused that mark, I resisted the desire to look away from where Phillips had been killed with a bolt fired by Casteel. But I made myself look, to remember. Phillips had somehow figured out the truth, or at the very least, that Casteel was not who he claimed. He’d tried to help me escape, but I hadn’t listened. I had no idea if Phillips had known the truth about the Ascended. He could have, but that didn’t matter. He was dead, regardless.
Exhaling slowly, I saw the very same bow attached to Setti’s side. It was curved like the ones I’d used, but this one had a handle and an arrow already nocked in place. The weapon was unlike any I’d ever seen. It had to be Atlantian.
I extended my hand to the horse, allowing him to sniff me. “Remember me?”
Setti sniffed as Casteel finished with the straps. The horse nudged my fingers, and I grinned as I gently patted the bridge of his nose.
“I think he missed you.” Casteel joined me. “And I think he’s been spoiled by all the attention you’ve showered upon him.”
I didn’t think it was possible to spoil any animal too much. I scratched him behind his ear.
Casteel was closer, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw him stroke a hand down Setti’s mane. Looking to the back of the barn, he lowered his hand. “I’ll be right back.”
Nibbling on my lower lip, I peeked over my shoulder. Casteel strode across the barn to where an older woman had appeared. She held something dark in her hands. Setti nudged my fingers again, demanding my attention.
“All right. All right.” I resumed petting him. “Sorry.”
Stroking the long, graceful neck, I saw that Delano and Naill were already mounted. Kieran walked toward his horse, but it didn’t appear as if Elijah was coming with us.
A moment later, Casteel returned. “Here,” he said. “You’re going to need this until we reach Spessa’s End.”
This turned out to be a cloak, a black one lined with soft fur. I turned to take it, but Casteel moved behind me, draping it over my shoulders.
“I had one of the seamstresses make it since salvaging the old one was out of the question,” he continued as he reached around me.
I didn’t dare breathe too deeply as his fingers worked the buttons under my throat. I tried not to focus on how close he was or how—I swallowed a gasp as the backs of his fingers brushed my breasts, reminding me of last night. I really didn’t need to think about that.
His arms grazed my chest. How many buttons were there? I looked down and almost groaned. The line of shiny black discs ended just below the chest.
“Just so you know, I burned it along with the Craven,” he went on, and my pulse thrummed as his chin grazed my cheek. “We lucked out that one of the seamstresses already had this mostly finished. There. Now, you’ll be less likely to spend the entire trip begging for my body heat. Though, I’d be more than happy to appease such a request.”