Of course I know the answer, but I want to keep him talking until I can figure out what to do. What can I do? I am brutally injured and I am pretty sure he is manipulating my body so I can't move. But I have to do something. I can't- I won't- lay here and die without a fight. I've come this far. I've fought through heartache, confusion, denial, and fear just to get here. The finish line is in sight. I have to make it. I have to survive.
"What is it?" I croak.
"Dear Gabriella … Did you know I knew your mother?" he asks, halting all thoughts of escape with his change of subject.
I take in a sharp breath, choking on the thick saliva that I am sure is mixed with more blood. "My … mother?" I sputter between raspy coughs.
"Yes," he smiles, tilting his head up to the ceiling in remembrance. "She was very strong. Very efficient and talented. Fierce. And beautiful. What a beautiful woman she was," he remarks breathlessly. His expression suddenly turns dark and contemplative. "I envied her. She was better than the rest of us and she knew it. She felt invincible. I hated her arrogance."
Xavier swallows laboriously and runs a hand through his neatly styled brown hair. He takes a deep breath before letting his shoulders slump. "But I loved her. I loved her so much," he says in a broken voice.
I almost feel sympathetic at the sight of his pain when a tangible shift in the atmosphere steals my breath. The shell containing his immense power, his human form, falls away piece by piece, unleashing a ghostly form. This is different from anything I've ever seen from Dorian or even Aurora. It's bright, blindingly so, and nearly translucent, more like a premonition. A whisper of a body.
He convulses as he shifts, fighting against his rage, trying to put himself back together again. He wants to remain in control. Once he's got his emotions in check, and the pieces of his humanity have fallen neatly back into place, he scowls at me, as if I am to blame for his momentary lapse.
"She couldn't love me, though! She couldn't give me her heart. Because of him!" he screams pointing at me. Wind whips through the desolate space causing my blood-matted hair to fall into my face. The cement slab under me rumbles with his sudden outburst.
"I could have given her everything! But she wouldn't love me. She would rather commit treason than be with me. To be with him!"
He's at my side quicker than my eyes can see, crouching down, his face just inches from mine. I can see the reflection of my terror in his wide, crazed eyes. "We could have been so happy together," he whispers, though his soothing voice doesn't match his insanity. "And look at you … just like my dear Natalia. Drawn to the Dark treachery. Did he fool you, love? Did he make you fall for him with his mind games? Make you believe that he loves you too?"
I'm too afraid to answer him, too frozen in overwhelming fear to even whimper a semblance of a response. If I could move, I'd be trembling violently. If I could sob, I'd be drowning in my own tears.
"Answer me, dammit!" he screams, spewing spittle in my face. He grasps my shoulders and shakes my limp body, causing the pain to spread even more.
"No!" I cry. "He didn't do any of that. He really does … he does love me."
"Impossible," Xavier sneers, dropping my body back onto the slab. My head throbs viciously and I'm sure the wound has opened even more. My vision goes blotchy and I feel cold. So unbearably cold. It won't be much longer now.
Seeing me slip away, he grasps my cheeks in his shaky hands. "No, no, dear love. I need you to stay with me." Then he leans forward and presses his open mouth on mine. Comforting warmth spreads through me, and I feel some of the debilitating ache subside in my head. However, I still don't have usage of my limbs.
Xavier pulls away after only a few seconds. "That's enough," he says with a satisfied grin. He looks over me, lost in his thoughts and rubbing an index finger over his lips. "Maybe it was you all along. Maybe you knew consorting with the Dark would help conceal you. Would throw me off your scent. Maybe you knew I would have to deflect, and in turn, would not be able to detect you. Is that it? Is that why you want him?"
I try to shake my head but it's no use. "No. I didn't know what he was. Not at first."
"And once you uncovered the truth? Surely you knew what kind of sheer, unrelenting evil he harbored. Didn't you try to escape him?"
"No," I answer confidently. "I … I love him."
Xavier snorts. "And where is your prince? Where is your dead father's best friend and brother in arms? Ah … that's right. Marrying his own kind. You see, Gabriella. They can bed our women and create … monstrosities … with them. But they always go back to their kind. They would not dare taint their precious bloodline."
"My father didn't leave my mother," I reply, rage taking over my trepidation. "He was killed for loving her. He died for love."
"They. Can't. Love!" he shrieks, increasing the rumble of the concrete slab beneath me. "They are monsters. Demons. All of them! They are the reason your world is riddled with hate and violence! The reason why your mother was slain!"
My tears flow freely, the hot saltwater diluting the thick blood caked in my hair. I know arguing with this maniac is pointless. His rage will only intensify and he may end up killing me out of sheer anger. I need more time. I need to try to make him see why this is wrong.
"But you can love, X," I say in a small voice. "You can right these wrongs. You can show everyone that the Light stand for good. You don't have to do this."
He reaches a hand towards me and cups my cheek. "Oh, but I do, Gabriella. I really do. You shouldn't be allowed to exist. You don't deserve the gifts of the Divine." He brushes away a few trickling tears, and moves my soiled hair out of my face. "And it is just my luck that I've found you right before your ascension. As long as I keep you immobilized and breathing, I can kill you right as you ascend and acquire all your power. And with that, I will make everything right. I will erase the ugliness that the Dark has created. Starting with your precious prince."
I resist the urge to crack a weak smile and tell him that his plan is botched. That, even though I may die, he will never have my power. I am still linked to Dorian. And when I die, he will acquire the magic that has lain dormant in my human body.
"But I thought … I thought the Light didn't kill innocents. That they wanted to help and protect humans. I haven't done anything to you. How are you any better than the Dark?" Even as I say the words, I am going over a thousand different escape scenarios in my head. There's no way I am going to lay here and die.
Xavier's hand travels down from my cheek to my neck before resting on my chest where my heart pounds fiercely, despite my injuries. His small token of healing has ensured that.
"You may have not done anything yet, but you are far from innocent. You have Dark blood running through your veins. You consort with the Dark freely." His hand travels down to my hand where the tiny blue anchor sits. He grasps it gently, running his thumb over my inked flesh. "And you have been marked."
I open my mouth to protest but before a sound escapes, he squeezes my hand, causing me to scream out. I hear the crunch of my splintering bones breaking like glass under his grip. I feel the jagged pieces slicing through my skin, the wet sounds of tearing flesh causing the acid in my stomach to churn. I cry and shriek in agony until I am hoarse, my dry lips splitting and bleeding. He lets my hand fall with a torturous thud, as if it's nothing. As if I'm nothing.
Xavier wipes his bloodied hand on my clothing and backs away casually, watching me whimper and cry from the excruciating pain. I want to die in this moment. I can't take it anymore. And from the way his demented gaze sweeps over my body, only God knows what else he has in store for me.
Exhausted from the overwhelming pain and sobbing, I let my eyes close, praying for unconsciousness to take me again. Let him do what he wants with me. I don't want to be awake for it.
"Wake up!" he shouts, slapping me across the face swiftly. My mouth fills with blood and it dribbles past my split lips and down my chin. My cheek is on fire and I suspect that the skin has been broken there as well judging by the way my salty tears sting the area.
"Fuck you!" I spit, thick bloodied saliva flying into his face. "You are worse than the Dark, you piece of shit!"
Xavier's eyes grow wide and frantic, as if he's gone mad. He smiles menacingly as he brings a hand up to wipe my spit from his face. Then faster than I can see, his hand is around my neck, squeezing dangerously tight. "You stupid girl. Do you realize how easy it would be for me to snap your little precious neck? To rip off every limb like paper? Have you no regard for your life? No sense of worth?"
I struggle to get free from his grasp but of course it is futile. "I'd rather die than let you have an ounce of my power," I rasp through the tight strain.
He retreats at my words, looking down at me with contempt. "Funny. That's what Solara said as I drained every drop of her essence from her body."
I flick my gaze to him, a disgusting smile creeping onto his face. "What did you do to her?"
"Isn't it obvious? I killed her. I knew she had been in contact with the Dark Light, yet she refused to disclose your identity. She fought hard and well. Just not hard or well enough. Being a hunter has its advantages."