She felt the magic's grip solidify, locking onto their commingled blood. "Then say so. Words have power. You know that. You know you have to agree for this to work. This is no time for reluctance or second thoughts. You came to me, remember?" Pearl took hold of the just-anchored strands, ready to break them.
"Don't." Grey took her hands and drew her closer, his mask of amused boredom falling entirely away. "I want this. I, Greyson George Arthur William Victor Carteret, swear on my blood and the spirits who answer my call that I willingly enter into this familiar's bond with Pearl Elizabeth Parkin."
Magic surged through the strands Pearl had built, thickening them, adding layers and strength, until Pearl thought even a demon's wrath might not break it. Nothing but once more stripping out the blood from where it did not belong.
"Now you," he said. "It's a two-sided bond, or so you keep telling me."
"I'm making it, aren't I?" she retorted. But he was right.
He went on. "If you're going to do it, you have to plunge in all the way. No holding back. No ‘just until Sunday.' I've agreed to that, but it can't be part of what we're doing here." He caught her face, turning it full on to his. She hadn't realized she was looking ever so slightly off to one side. "No hiding, Pearl. It's all or nothing, just like before."
When did he get to be so intense? This was Grey, magister of not-caring-about-anything. But then, hadn't she always sensed the intensity beneath his insouciant mask? This, the intense, passionate, caring man, was the real Grey.
Too bad his passion and caring weren't for her.
"Do you want this?" He held onto her, one hand gripping hers, the other holding her chin, his eyes refusing to let her go. "All or nothing, Pearl. Do you want it? Do you want me?"
There was no answer for that but truth.
"Yes." It burst from her. "I swear-me, Pearl Elizabeth Parkin-" She'd almost left out her name. "On my blood and the spirits who stand witness, that I willingly enter this familiar's bond with Greyson George Arthur William Victor Carteret."
"No limits, no holding back." His fingers gripped tighter.
She would drown in the dark flames of his eyes. They didn't burn, just sucked up all her air. "I'm afraid," she admitted.
"So am I. Terrified." He grinned at her, and her heart found its thumpety again. "Why should I be the only one to suffer?"
Pearl laughed. "You're not. I am laughing, and I want so badly to shake you."
"It's always been part of my charm." He let go of her face and brought her hand up to kiss the back. "Well?"
She sighed. "No limits, no holding back." It was useless to try. She hadn't been able to hold back from him yet.
The magic gave a sigh. It wrapped itself around them, encasing them both in its embrace.
Pearl's eyes burned with tears. It felt so lovely.
Grey looked startled. "That," he said. "That's what I missed."
Her heart shuddered at the blow. "I knew it wasn't me you missed." She didn't mean to say it aloud, but obviously she did.
"No." Grey clutched her hands when she tried to pull free. "Don't you see? The magic is you, Pearl. It's from you, of you-it is you."
She shook her head, tugged hard enough at her hands that he let them go. "It's magic, Grey. Power. Strictly business. Isn't that what you said?"
"Yes, but-"
She put her lancet away as she turned for the door. "We need to go find Katriona."
"This conversation isn't over." Grey reached the door before she did and held it open for her.
"It is for now."
26
DARK OF THE moon in December. The darkest new moon of the year, as the winter solstice approached.
The cold in the pit of Grey's stomach increased as the morning wore on and they got no closer to finding the missing sorcery student. He feared what might happen to her. Rose Bowers had left Cremorne Garden with a gentleman. Katriona Farquuhar vanishing with one didn't ease his fears.
And yet. The cold was countered with the warmth of Pearl's magic wrapped around him. He wasn't sure whether the bond locked the cold fear outside, or buried it deep under layers of warm sorcery. He functioned on two levels: calm and decisive on the outside, fumbling through confusion on the inside, but functioning. Because Pearl was there, creating both calm and confusion.
It wasn't exactly the same as before. He had hurt her, and somehow, he could tell she feared he would hurt her again. The fear was greater now, but it had always been there, even before.
The realization staggered him. Not so much the part about Pearl being afraid. He understood that. But that he could feel it. He might not be able to ride her blood, but this bond they shared allowed him to know her emotions. To know her.
He hadn't understood before now what the bond was-this sense of presence, that he wasn't alone, that someone guarded his back and always would. He'd assumed it was simply Pearl's presence in his life. Which it was. But more.
He would have known if she intended deception or tried to manipulate him into anything. The bond would have told him. Blood never lies.
He grimaced, making Pearl look curiously at him. He waved her back to Meade's expanded map. This one showed all the sectors of London and which searches-for the murderer or for Katriona-had been conducted where. Would Katriona meet Rose's fate? Not if he could help it.
Grey wanted it back. Everything he'd thrown away with his ignorance and irrational panic. He didn't blame himself for the ignorance, but the panic and the anger and the refusal to listen to anyone-that was all laid at his feet.
He wanted Pearl. He wanted her fixed in his life. He had almost convinced himself that he hadn't actually felt this way, that it couldn't have been real. Now that he had it back, he knew it was real, and better than he remembered. He would not give it up again. The magic boost was a nice bonus, but the real magic was Pearl. And the best way to hold her was marriage.
Maybe he could convince her again. She would be even more skittish now, but she cared for him. He could feel it in the magic. So how could he use that to-?
"Grey?" Pearl touched his elbow, calling his attention to the lanky, red-haired, transparent presence of Angus Galloway.
Now, darlin', don't you know I'd rather be talkin' to you? Galloway lounged against the air. But if you insist, I'll talk to th' conjurer, too.
How had Pearl seen the spirit? They hadn't been touching. Was the bond stronger now? Even without making love?
Her magic helped raise me, Galloway answered Grey's unspoken question. It gave us a bit of a connection.
"Why have you come, friend?" Grey nodded his thanks for the information. "Do you know where Katriona Farquuhar is?"
Why would you think I know where the wee lassie's taken herself? Galloway raised a shaggy, translucent brow.
"Because you're both Scottish?" Pearl said. "Because that's what spirits do-find things?"
Cheeky, that one. Galloway tipped his head toward her, speaking to Grey. I do no' know where th' lass is, more's the pity. I'm too new to be much good at searchin' out those who do no' want to be found.
"Wait-she doesn't want to be found?" Pearl reached out as if to touch the spirit and Grey pulled her hand back. Touching without sigils drawn rarely turned out well, for either party. "How do you know?"
I'd've found her otherwise, would I no'? Since we're both Scots. Galloway stopped his lounging, stood up straight. But I think I might ha' found where the bastard as did for me might've moved his lair. The general area, at any rate.
Grey whirled toward the map pinned to the chalkboard on wheels. "Show me."
Here. Galloway laid his palm over the map, covering the part of Southwark directly across the river from where they stood in the council building on Wych Street. Since his palm was mostly transparent, the map could be seen through it. Somewhere in Lambeth, around Waterloo Road.
"That's the best you can do?" Pearl protested.
"It's better than anything we've had before." Grey whirled back to address the Briganti who had moved in behind them.
"Sort yourselves into search parties and-" He pointed. "You, what's your name? Luling? Loring-arrange for transportation, since the carriage is out. We're going to Lambeth. Those of you whose spirits are awake, pass word to those out and about to meet us there. At the church square across from Waterloo Station."
Grey took Pearl's cloak from the stand and enfolded her in it, speaking to the spirit of the murdered man. "You will come with us, won't you, friend? Help us track?"
Galloway shrugged. Sure. Though I do no' know what use I might be. Your old ones, they're the trackers.
"Good idea." Grey sent out a call for older spirits, asking them to search, and at Pearl's suggestion, painted the safety sigil once more on her delicate wrist. Angus Galloway was, as he kept reminding them, very new at this spirit business. When Mary turned up as well, Grey was doubly glad of the sigil. By that time, the summoned transport had arrived.
"How are you maintaining your form so well?" Grey asked Galloway when they were in the closed hansom with the spirits.
I've no idea. Usually I canno'. Must be more o' the lady's magic. Since she raised me, an' all.