Dark Wolf(60)

"You pulled away from me," he admitted starkly. "You've never done that  before. I know everything that's transpired in the last few weeks has  happened fast and you needed time to assimilate it all-especially  becoming fully Carpathian."

It was more than that-she would eventually become as he was-Hän ku pesäk  kaikak. There was no getting around it, not when they were lifemates  and would never be able to resist the urge to exchange blood.

Skyler was silent a moment, turning his words over and over in her mind.  She had to admit to herself she'd been nervous each rising. She felt  safe, there in the ground, in her little cocoon, wrapped in Dimitri's  arms.

Before, when he had come to her, sometimes several nights in a row, just  to talk, they'd merged minds to do so, and she'd thought she knew him.  He didn't hide anything from her, but she'd never really merged so deep  with him that she saw beyond the darkness in him. It had grown like a  cancer, spreading over his soul, always looking for a way in.

To save him, she had pushed beyond that crouching darkness. She saw  every memory, every deed. She knew the dangers he'd faced without  flinching, the centuries of loneliness he endured without dishonor, and  she'd seen how patient he'd been, even while the darkness pushed at his  soul. Then, he had saved her, possessing her body, taking control of her  mind, merging them both so deeply that she relived those memories with  him, not just observed them.

Every kill took something from him, leaving behind tears in the fabric  of mind and soul, even after losing one's emotions. Bringing even the  worst of criminals to justice was not without a price-and he'd paid  often. The fissures and cracks had deepened, and that darkness had crept  in, taking advantage at every turn.

She saw the thousands of physical wounds. He'd been alone, or he'd been  with Fen, and sometimes, rarely, another hunter she didn't know. Mostly,  he'd been alone. He'd lived lifetimes, through history, and he'd always  been honorable, no matter the circumstances. He'd saved lives and never  asked for anything for himself-except her. His lifemate. He'd held on,  hoping someday he would find her.

"When I was trying to find you, Dimitri, I felt empowered. I felt as if I  was a partner to you, someone who could give you every single thing you  needed and deserved. I knew you needed me and I knew that I could be  exactly what you needed." She sighed. "But then we came here to the  Carpathian Mountains and I began to have doubts."

The pads of her fingers went still, remaining over the burns on his  neck. He found it amazing that in those raw indentations, he could feel  the concentrated power of her healing ability, and yet she was  expressing her reservations about whether or not she could be a partner  to him.

A thousand arguments rose in his mind, but he stayed silent. She needed  to be able to talk to him without misgivings that he might not really  listen to her. As much as he wanted to reassure her, this was her  moment, not his.

"I kept thinking, what have you really gotten in a lifemate? I've only  lived nineteen years. I couldn't hope to know the things you know. How  could I possibly match you intellectually? I'm smart, I know I am. I'm  only nineteen, but I already have several degrees. Still, what I know  about any one subject is a drop in the bucket compared to your  knowledge."

Dimitri felt her fingers moving again, smoothing over the burns around  his throat. She settled back on her heels and followed the chain links  wrapped around his shoulders.

"I kept wondering, what exactly do I have to offer you?" Her gaze jumped  to his and color flushed beneath her skin before her eyes went back to  her work. "I'm afraid of physical contact-intimacy-you know that. It  isn't news to you, but I just keep thinking I'm not bringing you  anything at all. Not only do I not know the first thing about pleasing a  partner, I find the entire idea repugnant." She paused. Took a breath.  "Or I did."                       
       
           



       

He was grateful for that small admission. He knew, better than she did,  that she was beginning to respond to him. She loved him, and her body  had begun to respond to his touch. He felt it with every touch, every  look. As they spent time together, he knew, if he was patient and  careful, allowing her to take the lead, she would come to want his body  as much as he wanted hers. It was another expression of love, she just  had to come to realize that herself.

"I don't know the first thing about pleasing you, Dimitri, and that  bothers me. I don't know how I'll react when you make love to me. What  if I freak out?"

He wanted to assure her it wouldn't matter. They would stop until she  was ready, but again he remained silent, waiting for her to tell him  everything.

"I don't even have my virginity-that was lost long ago," she added sadly.

That was too much for him. He had to respond, but when he opened his  mouth, she shook her hand and laid a finger across his lips.

"This is difficult for me. One of the things I valued most in our  relationship was that we could talk about anything. My past, yours, sex,  all of it. But we weren't face-to-face. We weren't skin to skin. I want  to be as comfortable just like this as I was all those times we talked  telepathically," she explained. "So I need to tell you this."

She linked her arms around his neck and leaned close again, using the  healing saliva from her tongue to bathe the worst of the burns around  his chest. He closed his eyes and just let himself feel her skin moving  over his and the intimacy of her mouth against him. Her breasts  tantalized him, swaying against him. His body was already hard, as it  was nearly every moment around her, but he found the ability to feel  anything at all was a miracle, let alone such intense desire.

His love for her was all encompassing; if that meant giving her time, he  had all the time in the world, now that they were bound together.  Whatever she needed, he would provide, and if that was time, it was a  very small price to pay, in his mind, for her to be truly comfortable  with him.

Skyler ran her hand down his chest, very lightly, just a brush really,  but it set his blood on fire. Her palm brushed his thick cock. Again, it  was the lightest of touches, but it sent a shock wave through him.

"I know you want me. How could I not? The crazy thing is, Dimitri, I  need you to want me. I do. I need to know that you think I'm beautiful  and desirable and even sexy. I dream of the time that I can touch you,  and love you without reservation or hesitation."

Once again she sank back on her heels and looked at him with tears  swimming in her eyes. He lifted her chin with his thumb and finger,  waited until she lifted her long lashes before he leaned in to sip away  her tears. Very gently he took her hand and formed it around his heavy  erection. No doubt his size was intimidating when he was fully aroused,  but she'd seen him naked several times now.

Her palm was warm as she curled it around his girth, her fingers one by  one bending to make a fist, trying to close. He kept his hand over hers,  light, so she could pull away the moment she needed to. Her heart beat  so hard in her chest, he could almost see it beneath her pale skin.

He tapped his chest. "Feel my heart. Hear it. Follow the rhythm of mine."

The tip of her tongue moistened her lips, sending another rush of heat  surging through his veins, straight to his groin. His cock jerked in  reaction, grew hotter, swelling even more in her hand. Her thumb slid  over the sensitive head, smearing the pearl of liquid. He knew she  wasn't trying to tease him, she was trying to get to know his body, to  feel comfortable with it, but her touch was killing him.

Her breathing turned ragged-small little gasps as if she couldn't get  enough air. Her body flushed with color. He very gently placed his free  hand over her heart, feeling it race beneath his palm.

"For me, you will always be sexy and desirable. Knowledge of technique  or practiced art is never going to be sexy to me. The desire to give me  pleasure, to please me in the same way I want to please you is what  makes you sexy to me, csitri. I can feel that desire in you with every  touch of your hand. Even now, your fingers stroke over my shaft instead  of pulling away."

He stifled a groan of need. Her fingers brushed back and forth, but in  that slow, leisurely way of hers, as if somehow she was imprinting the  shape and feel of him into her very bones. She was naturally sensual.  Given the right circumstances, she would grow in confidence and trust in  herself and him, allowing that sensual part of her freedom.

He watched her take a breath, the action lifting her breasts temptingly.  She didn't realize how intimate, how possessive her touch was. Long ago  she had become his, her heart, her soul and her mind. She loved him  with every fiber of her being. He belonged to her, body and soul, and  she was very comfortable with him, even skin to skin, whether she knew  it or not.