The squaws were getting out of hand, he declared, and it was largely Critch's fault. For where you had one squaw with a man and one without, there was no damn telling what might happen. And what the by-God was wrong with Critch that he didn't marry Joshie?
'What's the hurry?' Critch shrugged. 'I'll get around to it some day.'
_'Some day?_ What kind of answer is that? You like her don't you.'
'Very much. In fact, I think she's the most delightful female I've ever known.'
'Well, she's crazy about you, too. So marry her, dammit! She needs a man, and you need a woman.'
'Oh,' Critch said innocently. 'You mean we need each other to sleep with? That's why we should get married?'
Arlie said, why, sure, what else, adding that he had been greatly concerned about his brother's sexless state. 'It just ain't natural for a man not to be gettin' his stuff,' he said darkly. 'An' it sure don't do a squaw no good either. Why, it plumb makes me shiver t'think what might happen, if you an' Joshie don't start knockin' it off pretty soon. Might go crazy as bed bugs.'
'Well, gracious me!' Critch said. 'We certainly can't have that, now can we?'
He looked over his shoulder, swung an arm in a beckoning motion. The two girls immediately drew abreast of them, and Critch lifted Joshie from her saddle and onto his own.
She cuddled against him happily, giving him the reins of her horse. While Arlie stared dumbfounded, Critch suggested that his brother and Kay take a long ride by themselves, since he and Joshie had private business to transact at the hotel.
'We usually take care of it at bedtime,' he explained, 'but that suddenly seems too long to wait. I hope you don't mind… big brother?'
Arlie gulped; scowled. 'Now, look here – ' he began. 'What the hell's goin' on here? What kind of business you takin' care of, anyways?'
'Well…' Critch arched an amused brow at him. 'Let's just say that it isn't fiddling, but it's something that rhymes with the word.'
Joshie again burst into giggles, quivering deliciously against him. Kay gave Arlie a resigned look, then rolled her eyes heavenward.
'Ho, boy,' she sighed, 'you plenty damn stupid, ol' husband.'
'But – but – God dang it!' Arlie looked helplessly from his wife to Critch and Joshie. 'I mean, why, hell's fire -!'
He blinked his eyes. Vigorously shook his head in the manner of a man recovering from a hard punch. Somehow, as Critch began to draw away with Joshie, he managed to raise his voice in a feeble facsimile of insouciance.
'Ride her easy, little brother! Take your spurs off before you mount!'
'Leave spurs on,' Kay called. 'Make ol' Joshie jump!'
'I jump anyway!' Joshie called back happily. 'Ol' Critch, he plenty damn man!'
*The End*