"Where?" Vanda turned her head.
"Don't look," Phil growled.
She gazed at him, her eyes wide with worry. "What now?"
"You do your anger thing," Phineas said. When Vanda did nothing, he added, "Sweetness."
She frowned at him.
"I bet you just hated watching your club burn to the ground," Phineas continued. "I bet it made you really mad."
She took a sip of Blissky.
Phineas leaned closer. "I bet it filled you with uncontrollable rage."
She gave him a bland look. "I know what you're doing."
Phineas huffed. "Do something, Phil. Insult her. Make her mad."
Phil shrugged. "Nothing comes to mind. I think she's…perfect."
She gave Phil an angelic smile. "Thank you."
"Oh come on." Phineas glared at them. "Can't you two have a lovers' quarrel? Is the camera on us?"
Phil glanced at the booth where the short bald man was sitting. His camera was aimed right at them. "Yes, it is."
Phineas smirked at Vanda. "You know, you really shouldn't wear those catsuits. The camera adds ten pounds."
She gave him an annoyed look. "You guys talked me into being a sitting duck, but I didn't agree to be a trained monkey."
"Dammit, woman," Phineas snarled. "Everyone knows you're crazy. Start acting like it!"
Vanda shrugged. "Sticks and stones."
Phineas glowered at Phil. "What kind of anger management sponsor are you?"
"A successful one, apparently."
"Shit," Phineas muttered. He glanced at the Japanese vampire tourists and his eyes lit up. He reached under the table, then heaved it at the Japanese Vamps.
The table crashed on top of the tourists, sloshing them with spilled Blissky and beer. They jumped up, hollering in shock and outrage.
Phineas leaped to his feet, giving Vanda an appalled look. "Vanda! Why'd you do it?"
"What?" She stood.
Phineas slapped a hand against his brow. "You can't attack these people just because you hate Naruto!"
"Who?" Vanda asked.
"She hate Naruto?" The tourist named Kyo glared at Vanda, his face turning red.
"You ruined my shirt!" A second tourist wiped at the Blissky stains on his red silk shirt. He glowered at Vanda. "You evil woman."
"Hey, she did you a favor," Phineas yelled. "That shirt belongs on a woman."
The tourist gasped.
"She has insulted your honor, Yoshi," Kyo declared. "And she insults Naruto's honor."
"Hai!" All three Japanese vampires assumed attack poses.
"What the hell?" Vanda jumped back and quickly untied the whip from around her waist.
Phil glanced at Corky's cameraman. He was still recording. They would have to fight.
The Japanese charged with an impressive series of kicks and spins. Yoshi kicked at Vanda, but she managed to dodge it. She snapped her whip at him, and he backed up.
Kyo came after Phil, but he'd had enough martial arts training to block all the kicks and punches. He quickly discovered that a kick aimed at Kyo's expensive digital camera would always make the tourist jump back.
Still, he knew they needed to put on a show for Corky. Phil slung a chair at Kyo, purposely missing him and shattering the chair on top of a table. Customers screamed and ran from the building. Others stayed and laid bets.
Finally, the cameraman vanished. Phil assumed he had a deadline to keep in order to get the video on Corky's show. Live with the Undead was due to start in fifteen minutes.
"All right!" Phil shouted. "The show's over."
Phineas and Vanda stopped fighting. The Japanese Vamps stood there, panting, with confused looks on their faces.
"Congratulations!" Phineas grinned at them. "You guys just got punked. You'll be on a TV show."
"What?" Kyo glanced at the television. The Nightly News was still on. "We American movie stars now?"
"Television stars," Phineas corrected him. "You're going to be famous. And dudes, we love Naruto."
"Who's Naruto?" Vanda whispered.
"Let me buy you some drinks," Phil offered.
Ten minutes later Phil, Vanda, and Phineas were sharing a table with their new friends: Kyo, Yoshi, and Yuki. Robby, Zoltan, and Dougal came over to introduce themselves and congratulate them on their fine martial arts skills. Colbert and his men introduced themselves and gave the tourists more compliments on their fighting. Colbert paid the club manager for the damages, then bought everyone a round of Blisskys.