“No, I’m not. I don’t mind if you want to give me the wrong impression again.”
“That’s probably a bad idea. You’re not the only one who gets carried away.”
“Yes, I am,” I grumbled.
He chuckled. “You have no idea, Bella. It doesn’t help that you are so eager to undermine my self-control, either.”
“I’m not going to apologize for that.”
“Can I apologize?”
“For what?”
“You were angry with me, remember?”
“Oh, that.”
“I’m sorry. I was wrong. It’s much easier to have the proper perspective when I have you safely here.” His arms tightened around me. “I go a little berserk when I try to leave you. I don’t think I’ll go so far again. It’s not worth it.”
I smiled. “Didn’t you find any mountain lions?”
“Yes, I did, actually. Still not worth the anxiety. I’m sorry I had Alice hold you hostage, though. That was a bad idea.”
“Yes,” I agreed.
“I won’t do it again.”
“Okay,” I said easily. He was already forgiven. “But slumber parties do have their advantages. . . .” I curled myself closer to him, pressing my lips into the indentation over his collarbone. “You can hold me hostage any time you want.”
“Mmm,” he sighed. “I may take you up on that.”
“So is it my turn now?”
“Your turn?” his voice was confused.
“To apologize.”
“What do you have to apologize for?”
“Aren’t you mad at me?” I asked blankly.
“No.”
It sounded like he really meant it.
I felt my eyebrows pull together. “Didn’t you see Alice when you got home?”
“Yes — why?”
“Are you going to take her Porsche back?”
“Of course not. It was a gift.”
I wished I could see his expression. His voice sounded as if I’d insulted him.
“Don’t you want to know what I did?” I asked, starting to be puzzled by his apparent lack of concern.
I felt him shrug. “I’m always interested in everything you do — but you don’t have to tell me unless you want to.”
“But I went to La Push.”
“I know.”
“And I ditched school.”
“So did I.”
I stared toward the sound of his voice, tracing his features with my fingers, trying to understand his mood. “Where did all this tolerance come from?” I demanded.
He sighed.
“I decided that you were right. My problem before was more about my . . . prejudice against werewolves than anything else. I’m going to try to be more reasonable and trust your judgment. If you say it’s safe, then I’ll believe you.”
“Wow.”
“And . . . most importantly . . . I’m not willing to let this drive a wedge between us.”
I rested my head against his chest and closed my eyes, totally content.
“So,” he murmured in a casual tone. “Did you make plans to go back to La Push again soon?”
I didn’t answer. His question brought back the memory of Jacob’s words, and my throat was suddenly tight.
He misread my silence and the tension in my body.
“Just so that I can make my own plans,” he explained quickly. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to hurry back because I’m sitting around waiting for you.”
“No,” I said in a voice that sounded strange to me. “I don’t have plans go back.”
“Oh. You don’t have to do that for me.”
“I don’t think I’m welcome anymore,” I whispered.
“Did you run over someone’s cat?” he asked lightly. I knew he didn’t want to force the story out of me, but I could hear the curiosity burning behind his words.
“No.” I took a deep breath, and then mumbled quickly through the explanation. “I thought Jacob would have realized . . . I didn’t think it would surprise him.”
Edward waited while I hesitated.
“He wasn’t expecting . . . that it was so soon.”
“Ah,” Edward said quietly.
“He said he’d rather see me dead.” My voice broke on the last word.
Edward was too still for a moment, controlling whatever reaction he didn’t want me to see.
Then he crushed me gently to his chest. “I’m so sorry.”
“I thought you’d be glad,” I whispered.
“Glad over something that’s hurt you?” he murmured into my hair. “I don’t think so, Bella.”
I sighed and relaxed, fitting myself to the stone shape of him. But he was motionless again, tense.