He shoved out of the tent before I could finish.
“Give it a rest, Bella,” I heard him mutter as he re-zipped the door.
I listened for the sound of his retreating footsteps, but it was perfectly still. No more wind. I could hear morning birdsong far away on the mountain, and nothing else. Jacob moved in silence now.
I huddled in my coats, and leaned against Edward’s shoulder. We were quiet for a long time.
“How much longer?” I asked.
“Alice told Sam it should be an hour or so,” Edward said, soft and bleak.
“We stay together. No matter what.”
“No matter what,” he agreed, his eyes tight.
“I know,” I said. “I’m terrified for them, too.”
“They know how to handle themselves,” Edward assured me, purposely making his voice light. “I just hate missing the fun.”
Again with the fun. My nostrils flared.
He put his arm around my shoulder. “Don’t worry,” he urged, and then he kissed my forehead.
As if there was any way to avoid that. “Sure, sure.”
“Do you want me to distract you?” He breathed, running his cold fingers along my cheekbone.
I shivered involuntarily; the morning was still frosty.
“Maybe not right now,” he answered himself, pulling his hand away.
“There are other ways to distract me.”
“What would you like?”
“You could tell me about your ten best nights,” I suggested. “I’m curious.”
He laughed. “Try to guess.”
I shook my head. “There’re too many nights I don’t know about. A century of them.”
“I’ll narrow it down for you. All of my best nights have happened since I met you.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really — and by quite a wide margin, too.”
I thought for a minute. “I can only think of mine,” I admitted.
“They might be the same,” he encouraged.
“Well, there was the first night. The night you stayed.”
“Yes, that’s one of mine, too. Of course, you were unconscious for my favorite part.”
“That’s right,” I remembered. “I was talking that night, too.”
“Yes,” he agreed.
My face got hot as I wondered again what I might have said while sleeping in Jacob’s arms. I couldn’t remember what I’d dreamed about, or if I’d dreamed at all, so that was no help.
“What did I say last night?” I whispered more quietly than before.
He shrugged instead of answering, and I winced.
“That bad?”
“Nothing too horrible,” he sighed.
“Please tell me.”
“Mostly you said my name, the same as usual.”
“That’s not bad,” I agreed cautiously.
“Near the end, though, you started mumbling some nonsense about ‘Jacob, my Jacob.’” I could hear the pain, even in the whisper. “Your Jacob enjoyed that quite a lot.”
I stretched my neck up, straining to reach my lips to the edge of his jaw. I couldn’t see into his eyes. He was staring up at the ceiling of the tent.
“Sorry,” I murmured. “That’s just the way I differentiate.”
“Differentiate?”
“Between Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Between the Jacob I like and the one who annoys the hell out of me,” I explained.
“That makes sense.” He sounded slightly mollified. “Tell me another favorite night.”
“Flying home from Italy.”
He frowned.
“Is that not one of yours?” I wondered.
“No, it is one of mine, actually, but I’m surprised it’s on your list. Weren’t you under the ludicrous impression I was just acting from a guilty conscience, and I was going to bolt as soon as the plane doors opened?”
“Yes.” I smiled. “But, still, you were there.”
He kissed my hair. “You love me more than I deserve.”
I laughed at the impossibility of that idea. “Next would be the night after Italy,” I continued.
“Yes, that’s on the list. You were so funny.”
“Funny?” I objected.
“I had no idea your dreams were so vivid. It took me forever to convince you that you were awake.”
“I’m still not sure,” I muttered. “You’ve always seemed more like a dream than reality. Tell me one of yours, now. Did I guess your first place?”
“No — that would be two nights ago, when you finally agreed to marry me.”
I made a face.
“That doesn’t make your list?”
I thought about the way he’d kissed me, the concession I’d gained, and changed my mind. “Yes . . . it does. But with reservations. I don’t understand why it’s so important to you. You already had me forever.”