It’s all black now. Still. Cold.
Numb.
Chapter Twenty Nine
White sands caress my bare toes, feeling as soft and warm as tiny silken diamonds. I lift my head to the sky, my eyes closing tightly against the intensity of the sun, and take a deep, cleansing breath. The air is so fresh, so clear. My lungs expand gratefully and take in as much as possible. It feels good…so good to breathe.
My lips curl into the most genuine smile I’ve worn in months. My cheeks almost ache with the nearly foreign movement. But I smile through it. It’s a welcomed ache. Just as the bright, intense sun delivers a delightful burn, I relish in the sensation. It makes me feel vital. And happy. Finally happy.
Crystal blue waves crash against large boulders in the distance. A breeze strokes my face and hair, ruffling my white sundress. My skin is flawless and clear, no remains of brutality anywhere to be found. I smile again. Maybe I can be beautiful here. Maybe scars don’t exist in this place. Maybe there are no broken spirits or crushed hearts. Just peace and bliss. Two things I never thought I’d ever truly achieve again. Two things that were ripped from me at only twenty years old.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” an incredibly smooth voice coos from beside me.
I turn my head towards the voice, a voice I know as well as my own. A voice that has whispered anecdotes of love and adoration while warm, strong arms held me tight. A voice that could melt away all the fear and anxiety I’ve ever felt with just a simple ‘I love you.’ The only voice I have ever wanted to hear.
“It is,” I smile at him. “So beautiful.”
Dorian’s eyes sparkle against the backdrop of seawater and cloudless blue sky. His full lips curl up on one side as he gazes at me adoringly. “Only because you’re here.” He moves a curl from my face, tucking it behind my ear. I turn into his warm touch.
“Mmmm,” I hum. “Where am I?”
He brushes my cheek, his other hand finding mine. “Home.”
I smile at the word and turn back into the gorgeous view of stone mountains, endless aquamarine, and distant clay houses. “Home.”
We sit in perfectly comfortable silence for a long moment, enjoying the smell of saltwater and the feel of cool wind whipping through our loose clothing. I dig my toes deeper into the soft sand. I nearly giggle as the tiny granules tickle my sensitive digits.
“Will you stay with me?” I ask in a small voice, still gazing out at the water.
I feel Dorian shift beside me. “If you want me to.”
“For how long?” I turn to face him, my expression free from worry and doubt.
“However long it takes.”
Satisfied with his response, I scoot next to him and rest my head on his shoulder. Dorian wraps his arm around me in response, holding me close to him. I turn into the bare skin of his neck and breathe in his sweet, alluring scent. It feels me with euphoria, and my body relaxes even more.
“I’m not afraid,” I whisper, letting my eyes close for a moment and enjoying his closeness.
His lips are in my hair. “I’m glad. You shouldn’t be afraid ever again.”
I sigh with contentment. “I’ve missed you.”
“Little girl, I’ve missed you more than you could ever imagine.”
“So stay,” I murmur against the fabric of his white shirt. “Stay with me.”
Dorian’s lips brush my forehead. “I’ll never leave you again.”
We sit for several minutes, maybe hours, watching the waves collide with the giant jagged rocks until the sky begins to darken. Before night falls upon us completely, I turn to him. “I have to go, don’t I?”
“Yes.”
I nod, understanding washing through me. “Will you come with me?”
I see Dorian smile in the dimming light, his eyes shimmering and luminescent. “I can’t. But I’ll be waiting for you.” His hands come up to cup my face and he brushes away tears I didn’t even know were there. He leans forward and presses his soft lips on my forehead. Then they caress each cheek. When his warm lips finally meet mine, I instantly melt into his touch. Sensation rips through me, spiking my heart rate and stirring the butterflies in my stomach from hibernation. When he pulls away, I see a single, glistening tear roll down his cheek.
“Close your eyes,” he whispers.
I take in his beauty once more before steeling myself to do as he says. I’m not afraid. I’m not nervous. I just don’t want to end this. I don’t want to lose him again. But I know what I must do. I know that this is the only way. So with a deep, calming breath, I press my lips against his once more, close my eyes, and cross over to the other side.