Fear of Falling(72)
Recognizing the intro of Paramore’s “The Only Exception,” Angel joined in with her own guitar as she sat in a stool to my right. We had played it before, and I knew she would pick it up. I looked over and smiled at her. Yeah, I hated Angel sometimes, but I loved her fiercely.
When I opened my mouth to belt out the first notes, I knew my voice was shaky. I was afraid, but it was ok. Fear would fuel my determination. I wouldn’t let it ruin this moment. Not this song. Not when it verbalized every single emotion I was feeling but couldn’t reveal.
As we entered the second verse, K.C. joined in on bass while MiMi picked up her own guitar. I smiled and let my eyes close, letting the melody completely take over me. This was the sweet spot. This was the place where everything clicked into place and created magic. I didn’t even think about the movement of my fingers on the strings. I didn’t even worry about remembering the next lines of the song. I didn’t have to. Somewhere in those lyrics, Angel’s voice harmonizing with mine perfectly, I became those notes. I was one with each chord. I let the music guide me as I recited the story of my life, stripping myself bare in front of a room full of strangers. And I didn’t care. I was fearless, even if only for a few minutes.
Nessa carried us into the second chorus, the heavy drumbeats pushing us into the bridge. With my eyes shut tight, I sang for hope. For understanding. For courage. For love.
For Blaine. I sang my heart out for Blaine.
We finished belting out the notes together, as if I was a part of the band. And, in that moment, with the girls backing me up in beautiful harmony, I was. But the last verse, the lyrics that I so desperately needed Blaine to hear, I sang alone. I revealed more than my feelings for him on that stage. I exposed my soul.
I opened my eyes to a crowd of stunned faces before the entire building broke into hellacious cheers. I smiled, turning to my temporary band mates, as they all swiped tears from their eyes. Even K.C. was blotting her black-lined eyes and nodding at me. Turning my attention towards the crowd before emotion took over my own tear ducts, I jumped down in front of Dominic, who quickly pulled me into his arms.
“I’m so fucking proud of you, you know that?” he murmured, squeezing me to his body. “So fucking proud, Kam. I knew you could do it. I never doubted you for one minute.”
I gave him a swift kiss on the cheek before bar patrons congratulated me with hugs and high fives. It was all scary as hell, but judging by the overwhelming praise, it was worth it. If I never did anything that impulsive again, I would always have that moment.
I was surrounded by a group of fan-boys asking to buy me a drink, when my body began to hum, the intoxicating smell of mint and spice impaling my senses. I felt his heat at my back first, creeping up over my shoulders and down my chest, before settling between my thighs. With a slight grin on my face, I turned. I didn’t know what to expect. I didn’t even know if he truly felt the same, but the look of pure adoration on his beautiful face said it all.
“Blai-,” was all I could get out before his mouth was on mine, taking me hungrily, as he picked me up and coaxed my legs on either side of him. The bar broke out into hoots, hollers and whistles, as Blaine claimed me for the world to see. He didn’t care about staying professional. He didn’t give a damn what anybody else thought. And with his mouth working feverishly against mine, my legs wrapped around his waist, neither did I. It was overly dramatic, corny as hell and ostentatious, and I loved every single second of it.
“You are so amazing,” he murmured against my lips. “So fucking amazing.”
His tongue dove in for another taste, and I gleefully complied, squirming as his hands squeezed my ass through my jeans. My hands fisted the long layers of his hair that he so masterfully styled into unbelievably hot, “Fuck Me” hair. And that’s exactly what I wanted to do.
“Get a room!” someone called out, making us chuckle into each other’s mouths.
Blaine reluctantly let me slide down his body, letting me feel the hardness concealed under worn denim. I gasped and bit my lip, unable to tear my eyes away from the pronounced bulge. Following my gaze, he pulled me by my hips into his middle, giving me just a sample of what I longed to feel.
“A round on the house!” he announced to the onlookers, still holding me close to his body. “And you all can thank this beautiful woman beside me!”
We made our way back to the bar, where CJ was already distributing beer. He shot us both a knowing grin and clapped Blaine on the back. “Proud of you, cuz.” Then he looked to me and winked. “Sexy and talented. B better keep his eyes on you. Big dicks run in the family, you know.”