Fear of Falling(122)

The look of love.

Not everyone gets to experience it. But if you’re ever so fortunate, remember it. Hold onto it and never let it go. Because you’ve been given a gift.

“Dude, you just gonna sit there and fucking daydream or help us move this shit?” CJ scorns, nudging me with his shoulder as he and Dom maneuver around me with more boxes. “Fuck, how much shit does one chick need?”

“Welcome to my world,” Dom chimes in, dropping a box labeled ‘Shoes.’ He claps me on the back. “You’ll soon be the proud owner of shower drains clogged with hair, bathroom sinks sprinkled with makeup, and the occasional wish-I-didn’t-know-you-did-that moment that leaves you with a permanent what-the-fuck? face.”

“Nah, man,” I chuckle. “I’m ready. Bring it on.”

Yup, you heard that right, too.

After much persuasion, both in and outside of the bedroom, I finally convinced Kami to move in with me. We knew we wanted to raise our child together, and, hell, she was already over most nights, but Kami still had serious reservations about it. She had never lived with a man outside of Dom, and not having the crutch of her friends was seriously freaking her out. But she was getting used to the motherhood thing—you know, putting your own needs aside for your kid—and finally admitted that moving in would be the only logical solution. Plus, there was no way I was letting my newborn go back to the brothel known as Angel’s condo. That place had a revolving door of pussy, and some of it was pretty sketchy.

A shrill wail grabs our attention and we all look towards the door in time to see Angel stumble in, her face streaked with tears.

“Oh, Kam, I’m going to miss you so much!” she cries, falling onto the couch with her friend. “I can’t believe you’re leaving me with Dirty Dom and his band of glitter-wearing gutter sluts.”

“I think you’re mistaking my dates with your Wednesday night stripper conquests. There’s still a layer of edible body dust on the furniture. I feel like Elton John every time I sit on the damn couch,” Dom retorts.

Angel waves him off, yet doesn’t deny his accusations. “So Kam… you’ll still visit, right? We can go get massages and pedicures—Oh my God, can you still get those? Isn’t there like some bacteria you can get that’s not safe for pregnant women? And I read you can’t eat sushi. Sushi! But we love…”

Kami cups Angel’s damp cheeks and smiles warmly. “Angel, honey, breathe. You’ll still see me. Hell, I’ll be at the bar almost everyday, like always.”

“The bar?” CJ scoffs. “A bar is no place for a baby. Not my little cousin.”

We all whip our heads to his stern expression. “What?” he shrugs.

Hmph. My cousin, Craig Jacobs, the guy that made it his mission in life to sleep with the entire volleyball team in high school, the same guy who bribed the AV geeks to set up hidden cameras in the girl’s locker room, the very same man that vowed to never commit to one woman ever since his mom walked out on him and his dad, actually said something not centered on tits, ass or all things oral.

Maybe things are changing for the Jacobs men. Hell, maybe there’s a chance that CJ could one day be as deliriously happy as me.

After every box of shoes, clothes, books, and knickknacks is carried into the house, and Angel has cried herself dry, I kick everyone out. Finally, Kami and I are alone. In our home.

Kami’s head rests in my lap as I play with her hair and massage her scalp. The TV is on, but I can’t seem to tear my eyes away from her. The woman of my dreams. The woman that will make me a father.

Damn.

I can’t keep my hands off her. And knowing that her body is now more than just my personal playground, I can’t help but be in awe of her.

God, she’s beautiful.

My hand trails down to the edge of her jeans and up her shirt. I rub the bare skin of her belly, so soft and warm under my fingers. Without even thinking, I begin to hum softly, angling myself closer and closer to her stomach. It’s a bittersweet song for us. The song that touched Kami in a way that had her fleeing from the bar with tears streaked down her face. The song that prompted me to follow her, so I could wipe away those tears and hold her tight.

I think that was the moment I fell in love with Kami. The moment she had branded me down to my soul.

“Interesting song you’re humming. What makes you think we’re having a daughter?” she smiles at me.

“A man can dream,” I beam proudly.

“What? No bouncing baby Blaine to carry on the Jacobs name?”

“One day,” I shrug. “But for now, I just want to be our little girl’s hero.”