It was a quick drive to my apartment where I ditched my Tahoe and ran inside to secure my gun back in its safe in my closet. Then, I hurried back out and slid into the passenger seat of Austin’s Alfa Romeo. Being in his car again brought back a flood of memories. When we had been together before, everything had been so easy. So effortless. It was as if things were really supposed to be like this all the time.
I’d fooled myself into believing it. And I didn’t know why I was giving Austin a second chance. But I needed to toss the memories aside and live for today.
“So…dinner?” I asked. “I’m already starving.”
“Shooting takes it out of you, doesn’t it?”
“It’s like I ran a marathon.”
“Same. That was a total adrenaline rush though. I see why you do it so often.”
I frowned and glanced away. No one really knew why I went to the shooting range that often. But it for sure was not for the adrenaline rush. That was more of a bonus.
“Food then?”
“Don’t worry, Jules. I’ll take care of you.”
I leaned back against the leather seat, enjoying the sentiment. I’d thought he’d want to take me to a fancy dinner. It seemed like a Wright move. And, while we were in West Texas, where jeans, boots, and belt buckles were common dinner attire, I knew Austin preferred to dress up for such occasions. That likely ruled a fancy dinner out of the equation.
It felt nice, letting someone else take the lead for once. Even if nerves hit me, I liked the idea of Austin taking care of me. I had been in charge of my relationship with Trevor. One hundred fifty percent. And, already, I could feel myself handing over some of that control that I clung so desperately to. It was terrifying and refreshing.
We were past the loop and halfway out of town when I sat up to appreciate the flat farm fields on either side of us. The country? We are going into the country? Now, that was unexpected.
“Where the hell are you taking me, Wright?”
He laughed. “Well, your stipulations made it a little difficult.”
“I had one stipulation.”
“Sure, but I wanted to do it right.”
“Right or Wright?”
He rolled his eyes at my inflection. “Both.”
The first indication of where we were going was the Ferris wheel on the horizon. My jaw dropped, and I turned to face Austin in wonder. He had put some effort into all of this. I hadn’t even known there was a carnival happening right now. I would have thought it would be too hot.
“I hope you like carnival rides.”
“You are full of surprises,” I admitted.
He parked in the open field next to the carnival and helped me out of the passenger side. I glanced at the dirt on his shiny car.
“We probably should have brought the Tahoe.”
His hand slowly slid into mine, and he tugged me close. “I don’t mind getting a little dirty.”
“You or the car?”
“Yes.”
I laughed. Of course.
Austin looked like he wanted to kiss me but instead locked our fingers together and walked me to the entrance. I sighed at the ease with which we were together. Hard to believe that I had been screaming at him only a couple of days ago.
Okay…it probably wasn’t that hard to believe. Austin and I were only extreme highs and extreme lows. It was why those weeks we’d dated were some of the best of my life…and any time I’d spent with him after were some of the worst.
We headed straight for the heavily caffeinated, fried, and sugary foods.
“What are you in for, Jules?” Austin said.
“Funnel cake!”
“You’re going for a sugar high?”
“Best high out there, trust me.”
Austin ordered us two cheeseburgers, two giant Cokes, and a hand-battered, powdered-sugar-covered, deep-fried funnel cake that made me bounce up and down with excitement.
We carried our food to a wooden picnic bench and plopped down. I saw Austin look up at a sign over my head with a wistful glance. I craned around to see what he was looking at. The stand next to the burger place had a sign offering ice-cold beers.
Oh.
“Are you doing okay?” I asked, picking at my burger.
“Don’t worry about me. I’m fine.”
I almost believed him. Except I didn’t. He might seem as if he was doing really good on the outside. Great even. But I knew better.
“You know the road ahead isn’t going to be easy.”
“The road ahead?”
“Withdrawal,” I said in a small voice. “It’s going to be really hard.”
“I suspect it will be.”
“You don’t have to do it alone. You have people who care about you, you know?”
Austin reached forward and took my hand. “I’m doing fine, Jules. It’s a slow process. I’m not going to go cold turkey. It’ll take time, but as long as I’m with you, I feel like I can do anything.”