“Yes,” I answer assertively, but he doesn’t look at me or acknowledge my answer. He remains focused forward, holding my hand gently while I follow the curve of the fountain.
“And I trust you to share your troubles with me.” He halts and turns me into him, taking both of my hands and gazing up at me.
I clamp my lips together, loving him more for knowing me so well but hating that it means I’ll probably never be able to hide anything from him. I also hate that he feels so obviously guilty for dragging me into his world.
“Tell me, Olivia.” His tone is soft, encouraging. It’s desperate.
My eyes drop to his feet, seeing them move in closer. “I’m being silly,” I say on a mild shake of my head. “I think all of the shock and adrenaline were playing games with my mind.”
He shifts his hands to my waist and lifts me down, making me sit on the edge of the fountain. Then he lowers to his knees and secures my cheeks in his hands. “Tell me,” he whispers.
His need to comfort me fills me with the courage to spit out what’s been tormenting me since we’ve been here. “At Heathrow… I thought I saw something, but I know I didn’t, and I know it’s stupid and impossible and absolutely absurd, and my vision was obstructed and I was so stressed and tired and emotional.” I draw a breath, ignoring his wide eyes. “It couldn’t have been. I know that. I mean, she’s been dead for—”
“Olivia!” Miller breaks through my verbal vomit, his blue eyes wide and with a look of alarm on his perfect face. “What on earth are you talking about?”
“My mother,” I breathe. “I think I saw her.”
“Her ghost?”
I’m not sure if I believe in ghosts. Or maybe I do now. With no obvious answer, I just shrug.
“At Heathrow?” he pushes.
I nod.
“When you were exhausted, emotional, and being kidnapped by an ex-escort with a terrible temper?”
My eyes narrow on him. “Yes,” I push through clenched teeth.
“I see,” he muses, glancing away briefly before returning his eyes to mine. “And this is why you’ve been so quiet and cagey?”
“I realize how stupid I sound.”
“Not stupid,” he argues quietly. “Grief stricken.”
I frown at him, but he continues before I can question his conclusion.
“Olivia, we’ve been through so much. Both of our pasts have been very much present in recent weeks. It’s understandable that you’d be feeling lost and confused.” He reaches forward and rests his lips on mine. “Please confide in me. Don’t let your troubles weigh you down when I’m here to ease them for you.” Pulling away, he smoothes his thumbs across my cheeks and melts me with the sincerity that’s shining from his extraordinary eyes. “I can’t see you sad.”
I suddenly feel so very stupid, and with nothing left to say, I close my arms around his shoulders and pull him into me. He’s right. It’s no wonder my mind’s a jumbled mess after everything we’ve been through. “I don’t know where I’d be without you.”
Accepting my fierce embrace, he inhales into my hair. I feel him locate a lock and start to twist it around his fingers. “You’d be in London living a carefree life,” he muses quietly.
His somber statement pulls me from the warmth of his body immediately. I didn’t like the words, and I definitely didn’t like the tone. “Living a hollow life,” I counter. “Promise you’ll never abandon me.”
“I promise.” He says it without a second’s hesitation, yet right now it doesn’t feel like enough. I’m not sure what else I can make him say that will convince me. A bit like his acceptance of my love. That wavering is still showing signs, and I don’t like it. A repeat of him leaving, even if he didn’t want to, is still something I live in fear of.
“I want a contract,” I blurt out. “Something legal that says you can’t ever leave me.” I realize my stupidity in an instant and I cringe, slapping myself all over Central Park. “That came out all wrong.”
“I hope so!” He coughs, almost falling to his arse in shock. I might not have meant that the way it sounded, but his clear disgust is like a slap in the face. I haven’t given a second thought to marriage, or anything beyond today. There’s too much shit blocking dreams of futures and happiness, but now I’m really thinking. His clear abhorrence to the idea is making it hard not to. I want to get married one day. I want the kids, the dog, and the cozy family house. I want a mess everywhere from children running riot, and I know in this moment that I want it all with Miller.