Until Lilly(47)

“I love them, both,” I tell her, looking down at Jax, who is helping Ashlyn with the glue bottle. “If I could adopt Jax as my own son, I would do it in a heartbeat. He is so much like Cash that it’s scary. He has a big heart for such a little guy.”

“That’s all I need to know,” Susan says, and my eyes go back to hers, seeing tears fill them. I reach out and pull her in for hug. When we pull away, we’re both a mess with mascara running down our cheeks. The kids both look at us like we’re crazy, and then Jax makes me crack up when he tells us that his Uncle Nico said that girls are weird, and that’s why he doesn’t want one.

“Nico isn’t going to know what hit him when he finally finds his girl,” Susan says, and I agree completely.



*~*~*

“I have a question, and don’t be afraid to say no,” I say later that night when we’re in bed. “I won’t be mad; I promise,” I say, and feel my stomach roll at the thought of him not wanting us.

“What is it?”

“Um…do you, um…doyouthinkthatAshlynandIcouldmoveinwithyou?” I ask quickly, trying to get it out. I won’t be able to sleep until I know my daughter and I won’t be homeless. I love Cash, and have wanted him to ask us to move in with him for a while now, but I don’t want to pressure him about it. And Cash is Cash. I figure if he wants us here, he would find a way to make that happen. I feel his body start shaking, and I know he’s laughing. I just have no idea what could be funny about this.

“Are you laughing?”

“Baby, I have wanted you to move in since I walked you and Ashlyn to your car outside of the Jumping Bean,” he says laughing. Then his eyes search my face and grow serious. “I hated knowing I would have to wait to see you again. And it’s only gotten worse over the last few months. So yes, I want you to move in. I just didn’t want to push you too fast,” he says softly, and I can hear the vulnerability in his words.

“Do you think it’s too fast?” I ask, rubbing my face against the skin of his side.#p#分页标题#e#

“It’s not too fast.” He squeezes me.

“The kids?”

“Will be fine. Ashlyn loves being here. Jax loves having you both here. Don’t worry about this right now.” He pulls me so I’m almost fully on top of him. “The kids are their happiest when we are all under one roof. Right now, I want you to sleep. Tomorrow, we will sit down with the kids and talk to them and just make sure that they are good with us all moving in together, okay?” he asks quietly.

“Yeah,” I sigh, laying my head down against his chest and snuggling closer.

“I’m really sorry about all of this, Lil.” My eyes fly open, and I lift my head to look at him. His eyes are full of pain, and I know that he thinks this is all his fault, but it’s not. His ex is crazy and needs serious help.

“This isn’t your fault.”

“It is.”

“It’s not,” I say, sliding one of my legs over both of his and rolling so I’m sitting on top of him. My hands go to his chest; feeling the hardness of his muscles under my palms makes me rock against him. “This isn’t your fault,” I repeat as I rock against him again. I moan when I feel him harden beneath me. His hands slide from my thighs up my waist, under the edge of his shirt. I want to forget about today. All I want is to feel him inside me, and feel the delicious sensations I experience when he takes it over.

“What are you doing?” he asks as his hands move over my skin, leaving a path of fire in their wake.

“If you have to ask, then I’m doing it wrong,” I say, grinding down onto him. One of his hands squeezes my ass, the other goes to the back of my neck, pulling my face down to his.

“You’re doing it right,” he says as his mouth takes mine in a deep kiss, my fingers digging into his chest. I pull my mouth away from his, kissing my way down his chest to the edge of his boxers. I pull them down and lick up his length with one long stroke of my tongue. I want him in my mouth, but I really want him inside me, so I roll to my back, lift my hips off the bed and my legs into the air, pulling my panties off and tossing them away. I start to roll back when my ankles are grabbed and crossed above me, then pushed down towards my head.

“What are you doing?” I breathe as I feel his mouth suck the skin at the back of my thighs.

“If you have to ask, I’m doing it wrong,” he says, and I can hear the smile in his voice. Then he licks me.

“Oh.” I try to move, but in this position, I’m immobile. He licks me again, and this time I can feel his tongue slide lightly over my clit. Before he licks me again, I try to push up to get more contact, but he presses my legs closer to my body.