“Of course, Damien disappeared right after you were arrested. So, I waited. Then, when your release came up, I got in touch with a friend of Jude’s who works in probation service. I told him I wanted to help out with the Back to Work program they have for felons. I said I was looking for a maid because my last one had left unexpectedly. He put me in touch with Toby—”
“Tania,” I breathe out her name. “Did she leave voluntarily? Or did you make her leave?”
His eyes flash with hurt. “Tania was an illegal immigrant. She was deported back to Poland. I kept it quiet, as I didn’t want negative attention brought to the estate.”
“Convenient timing for you.”
Jaw gritted, he says, “Tania was gone for two months before you started working here. I didn’t fucking hurt her, Daisy. I don’t go around killing people for fun. Tania’s alive and well and living in Poland with her family. I can prove it to you—”
“Were you and she…”
“No.” Disappointment flickers in his eyes. “There has been no one but you. You know that.”
“Yeah, well, forgive me for not believing a word you’ve ever said.”
“I’ve never lied to you, Daisy. I’ve kept things from you, but I’ve never lied.”
“Bullshit!” I jab a finger in the direction of his office. “You stared into my eyes and barefaced lied to me the other day! You stood there and told me that fucking door never existed!”
Anger flashes across his face. “Clearly, that was a mistake. And I might have lied about that—hidden that from you, but it was with good reason. But I have never lied about anything to do with you and me.”
“All of this has to do with you and me!” I throw my arms around. “You kept this from me!”
“How was I supposed to tell you? By the way, Daisy, I’m taking out the men who raped and murdered my childhood sweetheart—the men who did this to me and left me for dead!” He slams a hand against his scarred chest. “That getting my revenge is the only thing that’s kept me breathing for the last seven years!” He breaks off, panting, his eyes wild and wide on me.
The worst thing is…I get it.
I get why he’s done what he’s done. If they’d done that to me or Cece or Jesse—what they’d done to him and Haley—I’d want to kill them, too.
But that doesn’t mean I would. I would let the law do its job.
“Why kill them? Why not turn them over to the police?”
He barks out a laugh, but there’s not a shred of humor in it. He steps back, leaning against the wall, and folds his arms over his chest, staring straight ahead at the wall that is covered with the news cuttings and pictures of Haley.
“Because the police don’t do shit. I gave them descriptions. The best I could. They put out photofits on the news. Canvased the area. Brought in a few suspects. Never the right ones though. Time passed. Interest in the case dwindled.
“So, I decided to do something about it myself. It was the least I could do for Haley and her family. She died because I took her in there that night. So, I was going to do the only thing I could. Wipe those three pieces of scum from the earth. It took me a long time to find them. But when I did…” Pained eyes come over to me.
“When I killed Foster…I threw up afterward.” He lets out a sad-sounding, derogatory laugh. “But I also felt good. Like I was finally doing something right for Haley. Killing Betts…I wouldn’t say it was easier, but to know I was ridding the world of those motherfuckers felt good. But Doyle…he’s the one I want more than anything. He was the driving force in what happened that night.”
“He’s the one who raped Haley first? The one who thanked you for letting him…it was him who stabbed you over and over?”
He nods slowly. “I just need to kill him…and then everything will be right.”
I feel like he’s not even talking to me right now.
“I kill Doyle, and I’ll have paid my debt back to Haley.”
I take a tentative step toward him. “Haley wouldn’t have wanted you to do this.”
He looks at me, and the pain in his expression cuts right through me. “I owe her, Daisy.” He looks away from me and to her picture. Tenderness spreads through his expression. “She was mine to protect, and I failed her. I won’t fail her again. I will kill Doyle. I’ll get my revenge for her…if it’s the last thing I do.”
Something inside me breaks.
Watching him stare at her picture, I feel like a voyeur. And I realize in this moment that whatever Kas feels for me will never be anything compared to what he felt for Haley…still feels for her.