BO
I LET AM HOLD ME EVEN though I could have broken away at any moment. In a flash I realized that this moment, more than any, would determine my future, because this was my choice, my decision. It wasn’t my father being a shithead or my mother being victimized. This was all on me. Would I answer every provocation with my fists, or would I employ that self-control I had supposedly learned? I forced my hands to unclench and AM grabbed on and lifted them to press them against her lips. I looked at her when I said the words.
“Not worth it.”
“What’s that, Baker?” Jerry taunted.
“You aren’t worth the effort,” I said loudly.
“Puritan, you’ve always been sick in the head,” I heard Gray say. He was backed up by murmurs of agreement from my other friends. Jerry Purdy wasn’t going to have an easy time of it when he returned to base. There were a thousand little things that the other guys could do to make his life miserable, and he had to know it. There was a scuffling sound but I paid no attention.
AM’s shining smile washed away the tension and filled me up. As I leaned in for a kiss, she glanced past me and her smile turned to a grimace before she shouted at me. I sensed him before I felt him, and twisted on the balls of my feet. He flew past me, and I gave him an extra push, which propelled him into the garbage dumpster. His body struck the metal with a loud clang.
“You ripped my fucking shirt,” he bellowed. Facing him, I could see the flush of inebriation riding high on his cheekbones. His pupils were pinpoints. Maybe Jerry wasn’t drunk; maybe he was high. I swung AM behind me, and I could feel the boys close ranks. “This was my favorite t-shirt, you asshole.”
I turned my back on him, not just to avoid the spittle-laced curses, but to put this day to bed. I grabbed AM and pulled her into my arms.
“Still with me?”
“Like glue, baby.”
“I thought I was Thor.” I nuzzled her hair, filling my lungs with the fresh lemon scent of her shampoo. I began walking AM backward to the waiting hire car, holding her a few inches off the ground so she wouldn’t trip and fall.
“Hey, Bo.” Gray ran up beside me. “A minute?” I nodded and held the door while AM climbed in.
Gray swept a hand over his hair, only small remnants of his regulation haircut showing slightly in the back. “I’m thinking of getting out.”
I gaped at him in total shock. Gray had a hard-on for the military. I thought for sure he’d be career. “I didn’t see that coming. Why?”
“Now that the troops are drawn down, we’re all just sitting around base and devising pranks. Guys are spending too much money and hooking up with boot chasers. There isn’t much going on, and it’s driving me crazy.”
“What about going to Officer Training School, moving up?”
“It’s either that or trying for one of the Spec Ops, but I’ve been thinking that maybe I should just do what you and Noah did and get out. How is it?”
This time it was me rubbing my head. “I mean, shit, man, I don’t know what to tell you. If you had caught me before AM, I would’ve said I regret it.”
“But now?”
“I lucked out there. Look, if you want to see what it’s like, a little, come with me for the rest of your leave. You can bunk with Noah and me, go to some Central College functions, and see what you think,” I said.
“What’s Noah up to? He hunt down his girl?”
“Yeah, although it was no walk in the park for him. Damn amusing for the rest of us. He bought a yogurt franchise.”
“A yogurt what?”
“A place where you go and get frozen yogurt and put shit on top. People love it. I think he’s going to buy another one.”
Gray scratched his head in wonder. “What’re you going to do when you’re done with school?”
“Thinking of throwing in with my man Finn. He flips houses, buys old ones and renovates them.”
“No shit. You gotta have a four-year degree for that?”
“Nah, but I’m about three semesters away from graduating with a degree, so I might as well finish it out.”
“Huh.” Gray sounded intrigued and while I didn’t mind shooting the shit with him, I wanted to take AM back to the hotel and remind her why she was still with me.
“Give me a call or just show up. We’ll show you around,” I told him and then climbed into the backseat with AM. “Tell the other guys I’ll see them this summer.”
Gray nodded and jerked his head toward AM’s side of the car. “She’s really it for you?”
“You know how it’s all about God and country over there in Afghanistan.” Gray nodded. “Well, when you find someone like AM, what you felt about the cause, about being a patriot, is like eating eggs from the MRE pack. Dry, tasteless, meaningless. It’s nothing. I’d kill for her and,” I paused, “I’ll learn to walk away.”