I frowned, but truthfully, I was feeling so bleak that I didn’t want to be in my apartment alone, and I didn’t want to ruin Ellie’s night out either. Bo held the purse in his firm and unrelenting grip while I rummaged in it to find my keys.
Unlocking the door, I led the way up to my second-floor apartment. I was mentally cataloguing the interior. The living room was mostly clean, as was my bedroom. I might have a few things I needed to toss into a closet, but for the most part, there was nothing in there that would make me cringe. It was silly to even contemplate that some random bra left on the floor could make me blush after what I’d just gone through with Bo.
He followed me upstairs without a word. Once inside, he took in the space with a single gaze and turned back to me. “Couch looks comfortable. Uglier than the backside of a steer, but comfortable.”
It was, but I wasn’t sure what he was getting at. At my questioning look, Bo enlightened me. “I’m not leaving you alone tonight. I’ll sleep on your couch until Ellie gets home, whenever that is.”
God, I was going to have to call Ellie and interrupt her night out, because there was no way I was getting any sleep with Bo lying out here on the sofa. My intentions must have been clear on my face because Bo made a tutting noise with his tongue. “No, Sunshine, I’m not going anywhere tonight. I want to be here with you, and the sofa is just fine for me.”
I could see by the set of his jaw that his mind wasn’t going to be changed. Throwing up my hands, I stomped into my bedroom and slammed the door behind me.
I was drained, emotionally. I had no reserves to fight off my own attraction. I couldn’t think of an argument to make Bo leave, mostly because I didn’t want him to leave. The moment he’d shifted in the car and I drew back, I felt a hundred times worse. I opened my mouth and in the darkness, it had all spilled out. It had been embarrassing to cry and to tell him how I’d lost my virginity and how I felt victimized by the toad. But I’d also felt protected and safe, resting my cheek against his marble chest and feeling his arms around me like bands of steel.
I wanted that feeling back right now, but I wasn’t prepared to give anything else tonight. I was wiped out and felt less sexy than I did on the first day of my period. Discomfited, I disrobed and got out my nighttime attire, which consisted of a pair of men’s boxers, small, and a large men’s Central College T-shirt. I pulled out an extra set for Bo and held them up. There was no way he was fitting into the boxers and even the T-shirt might be a stretch for him.
I changed, washed my face, and looked around for a spare toothbrush. I found a travel one my mother had likely stuck in my bag. Setting that out with the T-shirt and shorts for Bo, I opened the bedroom door. He’d shed his shoes and was lying back on the sofa with the TV on. At the sound of the door opening, he sat up and gave me a smile, which, as he took me in, turned to a frown.
I looked down and realized that I had the worst type of sleepwear. He was probably used to satin and lace and other sexy stuff. I plucked at my shirt.
“That’s a guy’s shirt,” he accused.
“No, it’s my shirt,” I corrected.
“Whose shirt was it originally?” he demanded.
“Um, mine? I bought it at the Bookstore.” Immediately his tense shoulders relaxed.
“You bought shirts in sizes that don’t fit you?”
“It’s comfy.” I defended myself.
“As long as it didn’t belong to some other guy,” he muttered.
“Okay,” I said, confused by why the shirt’s origins made any difference. I had washed it a million times. There weren’t any cooties on it, not even mine. “I’ve laid out some things for you in the bathroom.” I extended my hand into my bedroom to point the way. My bathroom was accessible only via my bedroom. As he advanced, I felt unreasonably nervous. I hadn’t ever had a guy other than Brian in my bedroom before, and he really didn’t count. The two other guys I’d hooked up with had taken me to their places.
Unlike when he first came into the apartment, Bo took his time looking around my bedroom. My mother and I’d tricked it out with bright pink and green and white linens. I had several throw pillows that never quite made it on the bed and matching curtains. The bed itself was my childhood bed, a double that was quite big for me, but Bo looked like he’d only be comfortable in a king-sized bed.
He looked at the hastily made bed for what seemed like an eternity, then turned his back on me as he walked to the bathroom. The door closed, and I thought I heard a groan.
I rushed over and gave a little knock, “Um, you okay?”