But then he waved at Asher without looking away, like he really did like my dress. Or maybe he was just freaked by my nipples. Now you know why I flatten them in a bra so vigilantly-as a public service. Because people do look. I can't really blame them.
"Hey, Ash. Long time no see. " Still Hunt kept leering. It was getting weird.
"Happy day, fella!" Asher's tone was hearty, but he clasped Hunt's arm and actually jerked him away from me.
I frowned at him. He wasn't being possessive, was he? For real?
He pursed his lips back at me, his eyes widening meaningfully. Oh, yes, he was.
Okay, now why did I feel guilty? Like this was my fault. Which was ridiculous. No sane human would ever call me flirtatious.
I mean, Hunt's okay. I suppose if an asteroid came and exploded Asher to smithereens, I might get over his demise in about sixty, seventy years, at which point I'd possibly consider Hunt as a viable alternative.
Crap, though, wouldn't that be horrible! A world without Asher. Talk about lonely. I pray he never gets exploded. I wonder if that's ever happened to anyone. An asteroid actually hitting somebody's house I mean. I wonder if in prehistoric times, how often people looked up at the sky and saw a flashing-
"Where's your girlfriend today, what's her name, Aurora?" Hunt said to Asher, bringing me back to the now.
"Aura," I corrected, when Asher didn't.
"Right, right, Aura. She sick or something?"
"Nah, haven't you heard? We're done." Asher smacked Hunt hard on the back. "We broke up. No more Ash and Aura."
Hunt, in turn, smacked his own forehead. "Now I remember. Sorry, bro. Weren't you engaged to her?"
"No."
"No? I could swear … but don't worry, Winnow's got you covered. You won't be lacking for female company today."
"Aw, shit, what's she done now?"
"She's been brewing plans. Didn't realize they were in your honor till just now. Come this way. Come right this way."
Hunt drew us inside, taking Asher's coat, exposing Asher's sinfully form-fitting shirt and jeans. Oh, my freaking god, he's gorgeous. I looked away so nobody would catch me leering.
Then remembered I had a right to.
Then remembered I was pretending I didn't.
Damnation! This subterfuge shit was so confusing.
"Not so fast." Asher grabbed his arm. "Karl here?"
"Not so far as I know. Why, he owe you money?"
"Baby Ash!" Winnow was suddenly there, hugging her brother, till she spotted me. "Sup, Char girl! Look at youuuuu! Love the dress. My lord, chickie, we need to find you some manflesh. Come with me."
And that was just the beginning.
To simplify this, I'll briefly summarize what happened in the next half hour:
People tried to pull me away from Asher.
People tried to pull Asher away from me.
And his family hounded him. Which, I'll remind you, I'd predicted.
Winnow started in first, poking him in the chest. "You're well rid of that witch. I never liked her."
(What? Really??)
"Yeah, I know, Win. You told me enough times."
(Really? When?)
"So spill it! Who is the chick in the black coat? Should I believe the rumors? Do we know her?"
I stepped back, willing everyone not to see me, as Asher drawled, "As a matter of fact," and that's when I panicked and said the thing I immediately regretted.
"She's a myth! She doesn't exist."
Oh, crap.
Why had I spoken? What crazy desperation had led me to such an insane lie?
I stood there with my mouth hanging open, feeling my forehead fry from Asher's glare. And now I had not only Asher furious with me, but a pack of Norrells staring at me, bewildered.
"Nonsense, of course she exists! I saw the pictures on my computer!" The speaker, I was relieved to see, was Asher's dad. And next to him was Asher's mother.
"Mr. N! Erica!" I shrieked, a bit hysterically.
Erica Norrell took me in her arms. "Char, baby! Shona brought a big surprise for you-it's your favorite condiment and some of that fire meat you like. Don't let me forget I made extra salmon rolls to take home. You need to eat them within twenty-four hours or they'll taste fishy. Oh, sweetheart, how lovely you look."
With all the cooing, hugging and twirling, I almost missed it when his dad said, "Come clean, buddy, you know we'll find out sooner or later. Whoever she is, she couldn't be worse than the last one."
(Wait, wait, worse? What?)
"Ash can date whoever he wants to date." Erica let me go in order to draw Asher's head down to kiss his forehead. "He's a smart boy, he knows what he's doing."
"I hope this one isn't so high-strung," Alfred Norrell snorted, and Erica turned her head and gave him the look I call sugary daggers.
"What?" He laughed. "You agree with me."
She put her hands on her hips. "Alfred, mind your manners."
What?
What?
Okay, what was going on here? Asher's parents didn't like Aura? I felt like I'd entered another dimension.
I thought all the Norrells loved Aura. They warmly welcomed her, they complimented her, they treated her like a piece of glass. They never, ever ragged on her like they did me. I mean, I have no complaints. I feel welcome here, too. But Aura was always special.
But hell, what do I know? I'm the crap one at reading people.
"I trust you to find the woman who's just right for you, honey," Erica was saying to Asher with a smile.
Asher's expression softened. "Thanks, Mama, I-"
"Black coat girl!" boomed a new voice.
I whirled. It was Asher's brother, Doug. He was fist bumping Asher. "Who is she? She hot? Way to get back on that horse, dude! We're meeting up for drinks tonight, no arguments. You can tell me all about her."
"There's nothing to tell," Asher said flatly. "Shucks, you heard Sloane. The woman in the black coat is a figment of the cam's imagination." He slanted a sarcastic look at me. I swallowed, because Pissed Male.
Is actually pretty hot.
But I felt like a lowdown dirty skunk.
And it went on like this. And on and on. Until finally Winnow led Asher away. He glanced back at me, mouthed You asked for this, and turned his back on me.
Snubbed.
By my best friend.
And also lover / boyfriend / maniwasinlovewith.
I watched mournfully as they disappeared through a door down the hall.
And crap, did Winnow really have something planned in there for Asher? She could get pretty wild with her shenanigans. I wouldn't be surprised if people were getting laid.
(Ahem. If you're wondering were there kids at this party, yes, there were. It was a family-and-friends party. But remember, many of them are Norrell kids, a different breed of munchkin altogether. Street savvy, for sure. Sheltering them from grownup stuff is pretty much impossible with this gang. Last fall, one little dude kept following me around, chanting, "Chary's gonna google penis, Chary's gonna google penis!" Don't ask. It's a long story-totally innocent, I swear.)
Shona, Hunt's half-sister and Winnow's other bestie, came up to me with a big smile. "What's been going on with you, Char?"
"Oh, you know, teaching and stuff. What about you?"
"I'm just fine. You look bummed. Are you stewing about Asher?"
"What? What do you mean? Why would I be stewing?"
"Well, you guys are buds, I just thought you might be concerned. Don't worry, Winnow's gonna set him up with someone and he'll be back to normal in no time. He just needs a girl in his life, you know?"
"Damn right he does." Nate, a Norrell cousin whose folks own a wheat farm if I recall, wrapped his big arms around Shona and me. "Yo, Char, Shon. Remember that one New Years Ash didn't have a date up at Uncle Matt's cabin?"
Shona burst out laughing. "You mean the year he crashed the snowmobile."
I remembered. I hadn't been there, I'd been with my parents, but I'd heard of it. Asher, charmed devil that he is, only sprained his little toe.
Nate grinned. "Dude's not cut out to go it alone. But you must know that, you're friends from way back, aren't you?" He gave me a keen look. "How long was he with that gorgeous redhead, anyway?"
Oh, hell, would people please stop talking about Aura already?
"Years," I said miserably.
The door where Asher had disappeared suddenly opened and Winnow came out. She shut it behind her with finality. She threw us all a dazzling smile and a thumbs-up.
My heart sank.
The scale of suckery here was increasing every minute. This whole thing seemed pointless. Mel wasn't even here. With the Pass being unpassable, Ryanna was stuck in Seattle, and Aura and Karl still hadn't arrived, if they were coming at all.