‘Whatever, dude. You go ahead and learn the hard way, but don’t be pissed off at me when I say I told you so.’
‘Get out of here. Go downtown and wait for Mr. Carlos.’
I waited and waited for her return. She’d been gone for almost two hours. I was beginning to panic. She ran. I was such a fool. I let her run again. I decided to call her.
‘Hello,’ she answered her phone in a whisper. I smiled. She wouldn’t have answered if she’d run.
‘Why are you whispering?’ I whispered too.
‘I’m in the library.’
‘Come home. We were going to buy you a dress, remember?’
‘Okay, sorry. I got into this really good book. Have you ever read The Morning by Onslow Warrior?’
‘No, and that’s not a real name.’
‘Yes, it is. It’s really, really good. I don’t want to put it down.’
‘Can you check it out and maybe read it later at home?’
‘Yes, I’m coming, but I’m a little afraid of stairwells right now.’
‘Let me guess, it’s another one of those horror books?’
‘Yes, he only kills girls in stairwells.’
‘There are no stairwells in that library.’
“Yeah, well there are steps.’
‘Come home.’ I laughed, at her silliness.
If someone would have told me I was going to fall in love with Morgan, I would have called them crazy. I was so in love with Morgan, with this Morgan, the Morgan that ran around in shorts and short shirts, the Morgan that told Derik off every chance she got. This Morgan barged into my office, fell asleep on my chaise lounge while I worked, and believe it or not wanted me to spank her and do all the dirty little things that I loved doing.”
Nice, Drew.
“I did ridiculous crazy things for her. I was wearing jeans, sneakers, going to baseball games, and sleeping with her in my bed. I drank beer in a sports bar and ate messy barbeque, which I loved by the way. I swam in our pool with her. I hadn’t been in that pool since I was a boy. Men didn’t do that, Michael told me so, and like a dumb boy I believed him.
I moved her to my room after a couple months of her being home. I needed her to feel safe and stop with the nightmares. It broke my heart to see her wake like that, scared and alone. I hoped that her being out of that room where the nightmares originated would help. I guess it did to a certain degree, but she still had them, and I wanted to be right there to hold her and talk her down from them.
My new mission in life became only her, making her happy and praying like hell that she never remembered. I needed her to know this Drew, and how much he loved her. I never wanted her to remember again. I loved her.
‘Stop that,’ she ordered, crawling into my lap and closing the work I had in front of me.
‘I’m going to start working in the office downtown,’ I threatened, although I was loving it on the inside. She didn’t want me to work. She wanted my attention.
‘I’m bored. It’s after five, you always work.’
‘I work so you can live like this,’ I reminded her, running my hand up her bare legs.
‘I don’t need this. Give me a beach and some sea glass and I’d be just as happy,’ Morgan said.”
“You remember that, Morgan?” Drew asked, turning my way, but continued without my response. “She froze. I froze. She was remembering something.
‘Why did I say that, Drew?’
‘I don’t know, Morgan. I guess you were seeing something.’
‘Telling the truth is easier to remember,’ Morgan countered.”
I smiled, remembering that day. That was a good day. My Grandma Joyce always told me that. I knew Drew was lying that day. He didn’t want me to remember.
“I smiled up at her without a reply. I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t lying though. I didn’t know when she’d ever been to a beach. Was that where she was during her time she was away from me?
‘You can work, I’ll read or something,’ she offered, removing herself from my lap. I held onto her, picking up on the mood change. She sounded sad and distant.
‘Morgan,’ I quietly spoke, looking down to her tiny hand in mine.”
‘It’s okay. I get it.’
‘What do you get? Talk to me.’
‘You don’t want me to remember, do you?’
‘No, Morgan. I don’t.’
She smiled a sad smile and left me. I’d long forgotten that she may be faking the whole loss of memory thing. She didn’t remember. I was sure of it, and my worst nightmare was that she would. She would remember everything and not love me. I wasn’t sure I could live without her now. I’d take a bullet for her. I’d give up every penny for her. None of it meant anything without her.