“Where was your grandmother? You said she took care of you.”
“She lived up the lane, but she wasn’t well. She couldn’t take care of a baby, and my dad forbade me to take him there.”
“He’s not your dad. Stop calling him that. Why didn’t you tell a teacher, a principle, anyone? Why didn’t you stand up for yourself and get yourself and Justin out of that environment?”
“I was twelve, Drew. Where do you think I would have gone? I was a statistic, just like everyone else that lived there.”
“Would you change it, Morgan? Would you give all this up and go back to that day if you could?”
“It’s not always about money, Drew. Yes. I would give it up in heartbeat to have Justin in my life, to have never watched him scream for me while he was being ripped out of my arms.”
“I can’t imagine that, Morgan. I’m so sorry.”
I had told Drew I’d forgiven him for the choice of taking Justin from me, but I hadn’t, not until that night anyway. Drew and I talked about my childhood, my mother, the lack of food, heat, and clothing, all of it. For the first time ever, Drew wanted to know these things. He asked many questions, apologized a million times for the life I was forced to be born in, and held me close while I cried for my little brother. I didn’t want to stop thinking about Justin. I loved him and never wanted to lose that.
Drew made slow, obsessive love to me, knowing I needed to be close to him, close to something permanent in my life. I think he needed the same thing, and once again we melted together, both needing to belong.
***
“What are you doing for the next couple days?” Drew asked at breakfast.
“Changing my shirt,” I laughed as Nicholas sputtered orange baby food from his mouth. He was so happy in the mornings.
“After that?”
“I’m going to the doctor with Alicia, probably get some lunch, maybe get our nails done. Why?”
“Curious. Are you taking little man?”
“No, he’s staying with Ms. Marta,” I inform Drew, then face Nicky. “Aren’t you, Nicky?”
“That’s it. I’m changing his name.”
“Maybe when Alicia has her baby I’ll stop,” I lied. I liked calling him Nicky.
“What’s she naming her?”
“She’s got a couple picked out: Daisy—which Celeste hates—and Trinity.”
“I hate them both.”
“Yeah, Celeste isn’t crazy about them either. She wants to call her Gabriella.”
“I like that. That’s much better. I could do business with a Gabriella better than a Daisy. She’ll never be taken seriously.”
“That’s stupid. Maybe she won’t grow up to be in ‘the business,’ maybe she’ll be an artist like Alicia.”
“I doubt that, not if Celeste has anything to do with it. You should hear Vincent’s role play closing techniques with her. He’s a spitting image of her.”
I rolled my eyes. I was like Alicia in that department; you don’t role play closing techniques with an eight-year-old. I’d save that conversation for Alicia. Drew and I would never agree on that. He’d be doing the same thing with Nicholas, I was sure.
“Drew, let’s go,” Celeste announced, pointing her arm towards the door. She was worse than Drew when it came to work.
I stood and kissed his soft lips.
“I love you,” he whispered hot words to my mouth.
“I love you too. I’ll talk to you later. Hurry home to me.”
“I will,” he replied, kissing my forehead and turning his attention to noisy, babbling Nicky. “I love you too, little man. Daddy will see you later on the computer, okay?”
“Drew!”
“I’m coming,” he yelled at Celeste, kissed me one more time and disappeared.
“It’s just you and me again, buddy,” I said, shoving more food into Nicky’s mouth for him to spit it back out. I hated Drew traveling all the time. Why couldn’t we have one or two stores? Why did we need twenty four strung about the country? I think that’s what we were up to anyway, I didn’t pay much attention.
***
“Spend the night. I don’t want to be home alone,” I begged Alicia once we were back from our errands for the day.
“Okay,” she agreed. I knew she would. She hated being home without Celeste too, and Vincent loved our house, well, the pool, I should say.
Marta, Alicia, and I made more food than we’d ever eat. It was mostly Alicia’s fault. She was the one eating for two. You would have thought she was eating for ten. We ate out by the pool and then watched a movie with Vincent. Alicia and I traded kids for the evening while Marta cleaned up. I helped Vincent with his spelling words, and she bathed Nicky.