Undercover Hunter(65)

                “Of course it could. That’s why Gage has told so few people who we are. He’s not just worried about gossip. Right now he’s worried about a lot of people who work for him.”

                “Thank God I’m not him.”

                But while speaking of Gage, and finding his position unenvious, another unpleasantness was creeping through her: she’d broken her major rule not to become involved with a coworker, however casually. A beer after work was one thing. Tumbling into the sack was another, and she’d gone and done it. Broken the rule. And she didn’t know what had caused her to cross that hard-and-fast line. So much for her bold comment about no regrets.

                She moved papers around her, keeping her gaze fixed on them as if they were all that held her attention, but now that the glow had worn off, reality was crashing in on her.

                She’d acted, reacted, without thinking it through, without weighing the dangers, without even pausing to stop for one clear minute of consideration. That was unlike her, and scary all by itself. Strict rules of conduct, whether her own or the army’s, had gotten her through a lot of tough spots, had kept her out of messy situations, and now this. God, had her brains gotten scrambled?

                She’d known attractive men before. She’d had flings and relationships before, however truncated, and they always followed the basic rule: never with a coworker.

                She’d acted like a woman possessed, without a single rational reason for busting the rules wide-open. There’d be a price to pay for this, she was sure. Cade seemed willing to put things back on a professional footing, but she didn’t think that was going to work now.

                How could it? They’d just had amazing sex. She wanted to do it again, and she was almost positive he did, as well. Hadn’t he just given her a choice between work and play?

                How was she going to handle this? She didn’t want to make him feel rejected, but she had to get back to the professional distance that had been her creed for so long. Work and pleasure shouldn’t mix, and when they did, trouble brewed too often. She hadn’t created this rule for herself out of thin air.

                “DeeJay?” Cade reached out and touched the back of her hand. “You’re...nervous.”

                She lifted her gaze glumly and decided she needed to be truthful, even if it meant admitting her own shortcomings. “We shouldn’t have had sex. It was wrong. We’re colleagues. That’s always messy.”

                His fantastic eyes narrowed a hair. He drew his hand back and studied her. “Sex is always messy,” he said finally. “But I’m not going to wish it away. So the question is, Agent Dawkins, are you capable of separating the professional from the personal? Because I am. I made love with you and it was wonderful, and I’m not going to act like it never happened. I want to make love with you again. But I think I’m capable of focusing on the case and working with you without letting that become a major problem.”

                It was a challenge. She couldn’t mistake the tone of his voice. “Are you sure?” she asked finally.

                “Hell, yeah. I don’t know how you factor all these things, but I know myself. I can work with you and save everything else for appropriate times. Or not at all, if that’s what you want. I’m sure as hell not going to force myself on you.”

                That stung a bit, but she took it in and made herself think about it. He was willing to agree not to have sex with her again if that’s what she wanted. Not words she liked hearing, silly as it seemed to her. She wanted him to want her. Just that simple. She even kind of needed it.

                But he was saying he could turn it all off if she preferred. While that didn’t make her feel very good, it also made her feel safer.