Then he had to sneak in the option he knew he had to give her. The one that would make it so she could walk away.
A nauseating fear consumed him at the thought of living without her again. Even if he took Lekzi out of the equation, he couldn’t go a day without his family, and that family began and ended with Sacha. He’d settled back into their love without even realizing it, and if she left, forcing him to spend his life with her just out of his reach as they raised their daughter together… Fuck. Just, no.
But as Vasily had told him yesterday while Alek had sat by his bedside, drowning in relief that he was able to do so, the decision to stay had to be Sacha’s.
“Fuck this,” he mumbled as he shoved away from the bar.
Fine. He would give her a choice. And if he thought she might be leaning toward the wrong one, he would try to sway her.
Decided, he was just about to go to her when a knock sounded. His phone chimed at the same time with a text from Anton.
Food is here.
Going out to the foyer, he let two men in chef’s jackets in and tried to be friendly while they unloaded. Telling them to leave everything on the counter, he over-tipped them and sent them on their way, reassuring them he was okay to plate and serve.
Go time.
When he got there, he frowned at the empty bathroom then continued on. He walked into their bedroom and stopped short. She was standing in the doorway of the closet. The silky wrap, black dress, and three-inch heels held his attention for only a moment. She swiped at her face before turning to him. Her perfect brows were puckered above her eyes that she’d done to accentuate the upturned corners. If the aw in her expression was anything to go by, she liked his sad little secret.
He didn’t have to look to know what it was. The left side of the closet was nearly empty but for a couple of suits. The right side, on the other hand, was full. Every item he’d ever bought her—dresses, skirts, blouses, shoes, t-shirts, pants, nightwear-sets—hung in the exact place she’d left them the day she walked out the door.
“What is this, Alekzander?”
He jammed his hands into the front pockets of his slacks as he walked over. Halfway there, she nearly sent him to the floor when, with a distracted flick of her wrist, she threw off her wrap to reveal perfection. Tits or ass, he didn’t know where to look first. He looked away.
“They’re your things,” he got out in a voice rough with lust.
His eyes came back. Fuck. He wanted his mouth on the curve of her waist. Her bare waist, tongue to skin, fingers buried deep between her legs. Here, she could let go and be the beautifully noisy lover he remembered. He wanted his ears ringing.
Her gaze swung up to meet his when he stopped beside her. “Yes, I…I see that,” she said haltingly. “But, why?”
He shrugged one shoulder, not knowing how to answer. “I…they’re your things. I couldn’t touch them. I tried a few times. Not to remove them but to feel them, hoping to feel you. Didn’t work. Eventually, I had to stop coming here altogether. Couldn’t handle it anymore.”
She dabbed at her eyes with the tips of her ring fingers in that way women did. “I like that.”
His lip quirked.
“But I hate that we lost all that time,” she added.
He nodded, feeling responsible. “Not as much as I do.” He took her hand and led her from the room before he tumbled her onto the bed and destroyed her instead of their waiting meal. “Food’s here. We can talk while we eat.”
They got everything ready together, and he’d never enjoyed more the little touches and fleeting smiles she gave without thought.
Once they sat, he poured the chardonnay and wasn’t sure he’d be able to swallow a bite of the grilled chicken and mushroom risotto. He handed Sacha a glass and picked up his own, holding it over the table until she met his gaze.
“Would you like to do the honors?”
She lifted a bare shoulder. “You have always done this. What would I say?”
“Say what you feel,” he encouraged, loving her beyond words.
She was quiet for a moment. “May I tell you something I have wanted to for a long time?”
“Of course.”
She put her glass down without drinking from it, and he followed her lead.
“I will speak as though in the past. Okay?”
Sweat broke out on the back of his neck as he nodded.
She was quiet for a stretch and then she said, “I went to the doctor’s appointment you set up for me today.”
Alek’s blood froze in his veins when what she was doing became apparent with that one sentence. She was going to tell him what she’d planned on telling him the night he’d broken them. “Oh?” he said through a tight throat. “Is everything all right? Did you mention you might need an iron supplement?”