Ugly(11)

“Hi,” he says when he sees me get off the bus. “How was school?”

“It was kind of boring today, I really wasn’t paying attention to anything.” I look down and smile as we begin to walk toward my house.

“Why is that?” Trent teases as he nudges me with his shoulder.

“I just had a really good time at the movies, and I was kind of hoping you did, too.”

“I did, I had a great time.” I smile. “Here, let me.” Trent takes my backpack and continues walking. “There’s something I’m concerned about though.” Oh crap. “What is it with you and your dad? The moment you saw him, all the color drained from your face and I knew something wasn’t right.”

I shrug my shoulders and avoid his intense stare. “Nothing really.”

Trent stops walking and grabs me by my upper arm. “Does he touch you?” he asks, his tone angry and his eyes wild with fury. “Does he fucking touch you?” His voice heats with pure rage.

“No,” I answer, though it’s not entirely the truth. But I know what Trent is asking, and Dad has never touched me sexually.

“Don’t fucking lie to me, Lily. If he’s tried to…”

“No, he hasn’t,” I interrupt before he can say those disgusting words. “It’s not like that,” I add, stopping any thoughts of Dad doing that to me.

“Then what is it? Tell me so I can understand what it is you’re going through.”

“You can’t understand, no one can. It’s just how things are.”

“I can help you, Lily. If it’s bad, I can help.”

“You can help me? No one can help me. Seriously, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it.” I shake my head and continue to walk toward my house.

“Look,” Trent exhales and jogs to catch up to me. “Here, take this.” He thrusts a phone into my hand. “My number is programmed into it, and if you ever need me, just call.”

I stop walking and look at the tiny phone in my hand. “I wouldn’t even know how to begin to use this,” I say looking at it, and then back at Trent. “Thank you for the gesture.” I hand the phone back.

“No way am I taking it back. Here’s the charger and the phone number is written on the back of it.” I turn it over to see a phone number scribbled on the back. “It’s easy to use, here.” He takes it, and shows me what I need to do to call him. “I got that number for you, so only you and I have it. No one else. And don’t give it to anyone either.”

“Okay,” I say as I slide the phone into my pocket. Trent puts the charger in my bag.

“Whenever you need me, you just call me. You probably don’t trust me enough to tell me what it is that goes on in your home, but one day, and soon, I hope you’ll tell me.”

I keep my eyes down and keep walking. “Thank you. If I need you, I’ll call.”

“Great. Now Wednesday nights I train for the hockey team, and I’d really like you to come and watch.”

“You would?”

“Yeah, well yeah…”

I smile as we round the corner to my street. “I’ll see if I can, but I can’t make any promises.”

“That’s cool.” Trent goes quiet and he walks me to the front of my house. Dad’s car isn’t here, so I know I’m safe for a while. “Um, this is my house.”

“Ahhh, um… Um, can I kiss you, Lily?” Trent asks shyly.

I feel my face turn bright red, heat immediately going to my cheeks. No one has ever kissed me before. Never. I’ve never even had a kiss from Mom or Dad. I don’t have grandparents or aunties or uncles. So I’ve never experienced anything like a kiss. And now, a boy wants to kiss me.

“Um,” I say, not really sure I want him to kiss me.

“Just on the cheek, nowhere else.”

I count to ten in my head, just letting the nervousness settle before I nod my head. On the cheek is okay, but I’m nowhere near ready to have a kiss on the lips. That’s too much. And I don’t want him to think I’m like some of those girls at school. I hear what they’re up to, and how many boys they do things with. I’m not like them, I’m different.

Trent steps closer, and instinctually I take a counter step back.

“I won’t hurt you, Lily,” he says as his right hand rubs up and down my left arm.

“It’s okay.” I sort of tell myself.

Trent steps closer, and this time I stay still, not moving. I close my eyes and just wait until I can feel his mouth on my cheek. His touch is incredibly soft, a tiny warm breath spreads against my flushed skin. His lips stay connected to my blazing cheek for no longer than it takes the human heart to beat.