She jumped up, whirled around, and slapped my hand away. “Don’t touch me.”
I pressed her into the wall, one hand curled around her wrists as I shoved them into the wall above her head. “Yesterday you let me touch you, let me eat your pussy, let me fuck you. You gave me yourself, willingly, desperately, wantonly.”
The last word broke through her mask. “You would have forced me eventually.”
My eyes locked on hers, my grip on her wrists tightening. “I thought you were brave, Angel. I thought you wouldn’t choose the easy way, but now I see you can’t even stand down the truth of what you did.”
She didn’t look away.
“Now tell me again, why did you give yourself to me yesterday? And be brave. Was it because you feared I’d take your gift without asking or because you wanted to be the one who decided to whom you wanted to gift it to?”
She swallowed hard. “I wanted to gift it to Danilo. It was his privilege.”
“Did you really? Or did you feel obligated to gift it to him because someone promised that gift to him without your consent.”
“Don’t you dare talk about consent.”
I moved closer. “Why did you give it to me?”
Her eyes flashed and tears sprang into her eyes. “Because I wanted to!” She snapped her lips shut and finally looked away. A tear slid down her perfect cheek, and she took a shuddering breath. “They won’t forgive me for it. They will hate me fiercely, but never as much as I hate myself, never enough.”
I leaned down and grazed my nose over her pulse point, my hand cupping her face.
“Do it,” she whispered, begged, and I drew back, looking into the blue pools of despair.
“Do what?” I nuzzled the soft spot behind her ear.
“Hurt me.”
My mouth brushed her chin and higher over her lips.
“Hurt me.” She said it harsher this time. I gripped her waist and turned her around, pressing her into the wall, her wrists still above her head, my body caging her. I was already painfully hard. The hand that wasn’t holding her wrists moved under her satin robe, and I found her bare beneath. I exhaled against her neck then bit down lightly, causing her to shudder. My fingers moved to her flat belly then lower to the trimmed curls until I dipped between her folds. “Hurt me, Remo!”
“I will, Angel. Patience is a virtue. Don’t you remember?” My fingers slid deeper.
She wasn’t wet like she’d been yesterday, just barely aroused, mostly broken and desperate to exchange one form of pain for another. I unbuckled my belt and took out my cock before easing it between her beautiful firm ass cheeks. Her breath caught but I dipped lower to her pussy. She was tense as a fist against my tip, sore, braced for the pain.
I didn’t push in. Instead my fingers started playing with her pussy, light, teasing, coaxing touches. Nothing like what she wanted.
“Why can’t you just hurt me?” she whispered, tilting her face sideways and upward.
Yes, why? My hands always gave pain readily.
I held her in place, arms raised above her head, her front pressed to the wall, my cock wedged between her thighs, and watched her cry. I claimed her mouth for a kiss, tasting her tears as my fingers stroked between her pussy lips. Soon I could feel her surrender. My fingers slipped through her wetness, and her pussy loosened against my tip. Using my foot I shifted her legs further apart then looked into her teary blue eyes as I eased into her. She winced and I kissed her mouth again, slow and languid, until I was sheathed in her up to my balls, my cock buried deep inside her.
“Now your patience will be rewarded, Angel.”
She smiled joylessly against my mouth, and I pulled all the way out of her then slammed back in. She gasped, her body coiling tight, trapped between my chest and the wall. Her pussy clenched mercilessly around me. I stroked her clit as I drove into her again. My body longed to go even harder, and so did she, but I held back not wanting to do any lasting damage.
Fuck.
What the fuck was Serafina doing to me?
Her eyes held mine as if she could find salvation there, but we were both damned, and I was dragging her closer to damnation every day.
My balls slapped against her with every thrust, and I was losing control, not just of my fucking dick but also of everything else. Serafina was still tight and her moans hesitant, pain stronger than pleasure. Claiming her mouth for a kiss, I abandoned control and came with a violent shudder.
She shivered in my hold as my cock twitched inside her. I pressed my forehead to hers, staying inside for a few moments. Her warm breath fanned over my lips, and finally I pulled out of her. Her whimper made me kiss her shoulder blade. Then I lifted her into my arms.
I carried her over to her bed and laid her down then pressed up to her back, and she let me. She was quiet. I ran my fingertips over her smooth arm. Her sweet scent mingled with mine and the muskiness of sex. The perfect mixture.
“And do you feel better? Did the pain help?” I murmured against her shoulder blade as I kissed it again. I wasn’t sure why I felt the urge to kiss her like that, but I simply could not stop.
“No,” she said quietly.
“I could have told you that.”
“You know all about pain and its effects, don’t you?”
“I don’t think one person can ever know everything about pain. Everyone feels pain differently, reacts differently. It’s a curious thing.”
Serafina’s body loosened further in my embrace. “I think I prefer pain. It doesn’t make me feel as guilty as pleasure does.”
I buried my nose in her hair. “You have no reason to feel guilty.”
She didn’t say anything and eventually her breathing evened out. I lifted my head carefully and found her asleep. Her pale lashes fluttered, her face peaceful. I’d never understood the appeal of watching someone sleep, had always found it dull, lacking. I had been so fucking wrong.
I kept stroking her arm then kissed her skin again. Fuck. How was I going to give her back?
I rested my head back on the pillow. I wasn’t tired despite the long night I’d had, but I couldn’t bring myself to get up with Serafina in my arms.
Closing my eyes, I allowed myself to relax. I had fallen into a light slumber when Serafina stirred, jerking me awake. She stiffened in my hold.
“It’s strange when your nightmares are less horrendous than reality,” she whispered.
“I’ve lived it, Angel. It makes you stronger.”
“I wished you had taken me on the first day, back in that basement on that dirty mattress like the whore that I am.”
The words ripped from her throat as if every syllable was pure agony.
I tensed, turning her around to me, feeling so fucking angry. For an instant, Serafina shrank back from the force of my fury, but then she met my gaze. She lay unmoving on her side, eyes full of anguish.
“You aren’t a whore. Is your fucking virginity all that matters to your family?”
“It’s not just that I’m not a virgin anymore,” she whispered. “It’s to whom I lost it to. They won’t understand. They won’t forgive. They will hate me for what I’ve done.”
“Shouldn’t they be relieved that you didn’t suffer through pain and humiliation? You succumbed to pleasure. So what? All of them have sinned worse than that, even your brother, particularly your fiancé. What right do they have to judge you?”
She blinked slowly. Then she surprised me by leaning forward and kissing me. A soft kiss. A soft nothing that felt like fucking everything. My brows drew together, trying to gauge her mood.
“I’m lost, Remo.”
I cradled her head and kissed her again before I rasped, “My note said that I ripped your innocence from you, that you fought me like a spitfire and that I enjoyed every second of breaking you.”
She held her breath, searching my eyes. “You made it sound like you raped me.” She swallowed. “Why did you lie? Was it because it would hurt my family worse?”
I smiled darkly. “I fear your family would have been more crushed if they knew you gave yourself to me freely.”
“They’d hate me.”
“Now you can decide what you tell them when I return you to them.”
“You will?” she asked quietly.
I drew back and sat up then turned my back to her. “You were never meant to be a captive forever.”
Her fingertips traced my tattoo. “Now that you got what you wanted from me, you’ll ask for Scuderi.” There was a strange note to her voice, but I didn’t turn around to see her face because then she would have seen mine as well.
“Do you think they’ll still want me now that I’m ruined?”
Serafina was many things, but ruined wasn’t one of them, and anyone who declared her as such was a fucking fool. “Your family loves you. They will do anything to save you, even now. Especially now.”
I rose to my feet and left without another look at her.
It was nearing midnight when my phone rang. I turned away from the screen where Savio and Adamo were playing a racing game. Nino and Kiara had already retired to their room to fuck. Without looking at the screen, I knew who it was. I picked up.
“Dante?”
My brothers slanted me curious looks. “I got your message,” Dante gritted out. I could practically feel his fury. It wasn’t as exhilarating as I’d expected.