Surprise washed over me at the vehemence in her voice and the fierceness in her eyes. She meant it. There was not a hint of doubt in her expression. Her crush had led me to believe that she might be open to a bit of playing outside of the rules. Now I realized I might have misjudged her.
“I’ll be your husband soon, and then everything is mine.”
“But you aren’t yet,” she said firmly. “And until then I won’t give you anything. My family will seek retribution if you take something. They won’t care that you are a Falcone. They will protect my honor.”
Diego’s words from last night flashed in my head, and my anger spiked once more. “They would die.”
She swallowed. “Maybe.”
I leaned down, regarding her olive eyes, resolute and anxious. “They won’t have to seek retribution, Gem. If you want to wait until marriage, I won’t push you.”
Suspicion filled her face. “You won’t? That’s not your usual style.”
My smile widened. She was right. I loved to push her buttons, and it would be difficult not to keep doing so, but this was different. While my brothers and I weren’t Traditionalists, we respected our men and their families, and that included their old-fashioned values. Remo kept reminding me of that fact repeatedly.
Besides, it gave me a thrill knowing that Gemma would only be mine alone, even if the wait until our marriage would prove tricky. But I had other girls for fucking and sucking until then. Maybe the wait would add even more thrill to our wedding night. I tilted my head, bringing our faces closer. Gemma was the full package. Choir girl and sex bomb, a lethal combination of heaven and hell. Being around her, you couldn’t help but want to be sinner and saint, only so you could be closer to her.
“Savio…” Gemma said in warning, bringing her palms up against my chest.
I got that she didn’t want to have sex before our wedding night, but why deprive herself of all the other fun things I could show her? “Is a kiss really so bad? Your mouth is so fucking kissable.”
“Well, your mouth is coming around too much for my taste. You’ve probably kissed more lady parts than most toilet seats.”
My arms gave in from the force of my laughter. Fuck, Gemma was one of a kind. Resting my forehead against the wall, my body pressed into Gemma. “Lady parts?” I repeated between chuckles as I tilted my head down.
Gemma raised her head. We were so fucking close, her lips were begging for me to bridge the few inches between us. “How about you call them what everyone does? Pussy.”
Her cheeks turned red. “I’m not going to take that word into my mouth.” She pushed harder against my chest, but I didn’t budge.
“I’d love to have your pussy in my mouth,” I growled, and doing my usual routine without even thinking about it, I ground myself against the woman in front of me to show her what she was doing to me.
Gemma tensed, her eyes widening in shock. She jerked her knee up and hit my balls. Pain shot through my body and I groaned. She quickly slipped out under my arm and stormed away. “That’s called Bull’s eye!”
Fuck. Anger surged through me. I chased her despite the fucking throbbing in my balls, and I grabbed her wrist. She whirled on me. “Don’t do that ever again,” I growled.
She narrowed her eyes. “How about this then?” She swung her fist at me, aiming straight for my nose. My arm shot up, blocking her assault. I’d been fighting in the cage for years now against guys weighing twice as much as Gemma. She was a good fighter for a small girl, but that was it. I gripped her other wrist and jerked her against me, holding her fast. Her hair had come undone from her ponytail and framed her face in wild curls. “Apologize,” she seethed.
My eyebrows shot up. “I’m not the one who smashed his knee into your lady parts.”
“Apologize for disrespecting me.”
I regarded her. She was dead serious.
“If anyone else treated me the way you just did…”
“I’d cut his dick off and let him bleed out,” I finished.
“Do you want people to think I’m someone who can be disrespected? Do you want people to call me your slut like they do your other girls?”
“Nobody would dare because you are my fucking fiancée, because you’ll be a Falcone. That’s a fucking big difference.”
“Then treat me different to your sluts.”
I sighed. “Fine, Kitty. I’ll honor your boundaries from this day on if that’s what you want.”
“I do.”
She’d be the one who had to get herself off with her own hand while I’d just do what I’d always done. The thought of Gemma touching herself wedged itself into my brain.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked suspiciously.
I stepped back with a smirk. “Don’t you need to head home to prepare for your confession this Sunday?”
“You should consider confessing.”
“I don’t want to give the pastor a heart attack.”
Diego came to pick me up. He’d only dropped me off at the gym, claiming he had something to do. I suspected that something was Toni. I’d ask her later. He’d avoided me since I’d caught him with Toni yesterday, had spent our entire drive talking to Dad on the phone as if their conversation about the new opening hours of the Capri couldn’t wait until we were home.
Diego nodded a greeting at Savio who returned it. I used the chance to step away from him and grabbed my gym bag before I followed my brother outside without another look at Savio. “Anything I need to know?” Diego asked when we were in the car.
“No. Anything I need to know about Toni and you?”
His mouth tightened as he started the car and pulled on the street. “There’s no Antonia and me.”
“Really? It didn’t sound that way when she told me about you two.”
He slanted me a wary look. “You talked about me?”
“She’s my best friend, Diego. So, are you two dating?”
Diego made a small noise that could have been confirmation or denial, I couldn’t tell. When I didn’t stop staring, he sighed. “No, we’re not dating, Gemma, and we won’t.”
“But you took Toni’s virginity!”
Diego looked as if he considered jumping out of the driving car. I couldn’t take his comfort into consideration when Toni’s heart was on the line.
“She talked to you about that?” he growled.
“Of course, she did.”
“We’re just having fun, Gemma. Antonia hasn’t been brought up with our values. Her virginity doesn’t have the same importance in her life.”
“Are you serious?” I hissed. “That doesn’t mean it didn’t mean anything. My God, Diego, can you be any more of an asshole?”
“Don’t stick your nose in my business, especially my sex life.”
“I couldn’t care less about your sex life if it didn’t involve my best friend!” I paused. “And ditto, by the way, concerning my sex life with Savio.”
Diego jerked. After a glance at me, he relaxed. “You don’t have a sex life.”
“Yet,” I said, enjoying the tortured look on my brother’s face.
Savio didn’t try to initiate anything in the months that followed. No word about marriage either. He kept visiting Diego like he’d done in the past, but he’d returned to treating me with a distant respect and the occasional teasing. It wasn’t really what I’d hoped for. I’d thought he’d make an effort, not pull back entirely.
It was the beginning of April—Savio’s twenty-second birthday, and I baked a cake for him. Even if things between us were currently more distant, I wanted to surprise him with it. One of us had to make an effort, at least.
My phone rang when I was about to pull the cake out of the oven. Nonna frowned, still not happy with me having my own cell phone, but she removed the cake for me. I sent her a smile before I picked up.
“Hey Toni, what’s up?”
“Nothing.”
She didn’t sound like nothing. “Toni?”
Nonna watched me closely. Her feelings toward Toni hadn’t changed, and she didn’t even know about her and Diego. No one did, except for me.
I headed into the living room, away from Nonna’s watchful eyes. Mom was playing on the floor with Carlotta, who had been getting worse. She’d need a heart transplant soon, if we found a heart for her and if Dad got the money we needed for her treatment.
I touched Carlotta’s head in passing.
Toni sniffled and my insides tightened. She, unlike me, wasn’t a crier. “Diego broke things off today.”
I froze. Diego had refused to talk to me about Toni, and she had kept seeing him despite my veiled warning that he might not be serious about her. “What happened?”
“I don’t know. He didn’t say much. He didn’t have much time. Apparently, he’s helping Savio with his birthday party.”
“Party?” I echoed. I hadn’t been invited to a party. A suspicion wormed its way into my head.
“Yeah,” Toni said, already sounding more like herself. I wished I could stop crying this quickly. “I asked around a bit. It seems Savio is throwing a big party for friends and fellow Camorrista in a mansion he bought for that purpose. The house party of the year.”