“What's wrong?” Luke asked, confusion and hurt mingling on his face.
“I.... I just.... can't remember you ever kissing me like that before. I was surprised.” Sadi studied Luke's face looking for some sign, some signal, that something was amiss, but she found nothing. No guile. Just unguarded affection. Sadi saw the fire burning in his eyes. His eyes roamed hungrily over her body. Sadi felt her skin flush with the pleasure of being noticed. Luke hadn't looked at her like that in months.
Luke gripped Sadi’s hand, turning it over so he could run his finger over her knuckles. He looked up and met her eyes with his. She was surprised to see a sheen of moisture there. “Sadi, I.... I came so close to dying. I've lost almost everything I ever loved and cared about. Yet you're still here with me. I've been so thankful to have you with me these past few weeks. You've been my only light through this.”
Sadi smiled though she felt her throat close with tears. The bombing had been terrible. People had been hurt and Connor was gone. Their life lay in tatters, yet Luke was thankful for her. Of course she should be here. Of course she should be supportive and loving. She was Luke’s fiancé. She felt her stomach do a flip flop of guilt. Had Luke sensed that she wasn’t in love with him anymore? Had he been having second thoughts about their relationship as well?
“We can start over Sadi,” Luke said gently. “I want our life to be different. I realize now what’s really important. It’s not the business, it’s not the money, not working out, not eating so damned healthy. It’s the people. Living every single moment with them like you’re not going to get another one.”
Sadi smiled gently. She reached up and stroked Luke’s cheek. She didn’t know what to say. Simply touching Luke sent shivers racing through her fingers and down her arm.
“I know we were happy before, but I want our lives to mean something now. After everything that happened... It made me realize how short life is. I want to make the most of it, with you."
Sadi thought about all the doubts she had about marrying Luke before the bombing. They had both been so busy with everything that their relationship felt like an afterthought. None of that mattered now. If Luke wanted a fresh start, a clean slate, Sadi would do her best to give it to him. She had vowed if they got another chance, she wouldn't squander it. She would do everything in her power to find happiness, to love Luke like a wife should.
“Luke,” Sadi whispered. “I’m so sorry for everything that happened, but you’re right, it made me see things much more clearly. I want this life, with you. No matter what happens, all I need is you."
It was Sadi who took a step forward this time. She went gladly into Luke’s open arms. He held her for a long while, letting her savour the feel of him before he tilted her head up and kissed her soundly. The kiss was less desperate than the first one. Sadi didn't feel like she was being claimed. She felt treasured. Desired. Needed. It was no less searing in its intensity.
Sadi wrapped her arms around Luke's neck, moved her hands up and through his blonde hair. It was coarser than she remembered. Probably from the horrible shampoo at the hospital.
In one swift motion, Luke surprised Sadi by picking her up. He carried her to their bedroom and laid her gently on the bed. She expected him to do something else, remove her clothes, kiss her… but he just took her into his arms and held her. Sadi hung onto him as well. She could feel his pain, his stress, all his pent up emotion pouring into her.
She couldn’t remember the last time Luke held her, or let her hold him. He was just always so busy, always in such a rush. Their relationship had really lacked the intimacy Sadi hadn’t realized she craved. She took a deep breath and clung to Luke, more thankful than ever that he was still here with her. She thought that if they could just get through the next couple weeks, maybe they would have a shot at making it after all.
Sadi stood beside her husband, trying to let her presence be the support he needed. She slipped her hand into his. She didn’t miss the trembling that started in his fingers and spread to his palm. She gave a firm squeeze and the trembling stopped.
Despite Luke’s protests, they had decided to hold a memorial service for Connor. Luke hadn’t been in a hurry. Sadi thought he was trying to delay as long as possible; to give his brother the time he needed to show up. Sadi found it hard to believe that Connor was gone.
No body had been found. It just didn’t make sense. Sure it had been explained to them that the blast could have obliterated any remains, but Sadi found that hard to buy. Surely there would have been something left. They had advanced forensic science for god sakes.