Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes(68)

 

After we spread out a blanket under a tree, we settled in to eat, the kids excited to play in the water. Violet and I convinced them to eat the majority of their lunch before they took off, leaving Violet, Muffy and me behind.

 

The sun bore down as we stood at the edge of the splash park concrete. Ashley tugged on my wrist, pulling me toward the fountains, looking up at me with pouty eyes. I didn’t have a swimming suit, but decided I might never get the chance again. I hadn't seen a weather forecast for the next few days, but today it was hot and sunny, with no clouds in sight. There was a good possibility it wouldn’t rain between now and Sunday. Maybe this could count for play in the rain.

 

Violet held Muffy’s leash while I ran in, hands over my head, screaming from the shock of the cold water pelting my skin. I shrugged off my inhibitions, tossing them away like an old tattered coat. The chains wrapped around my life slipped off one link at a time with every puddle I stomped. I almost cried from the freedom. Ashley and Mikey laughed as we spun in circles and ran through pools of water. I’d never done this before, completely let go of everything. I felt so light and free I expected to float up into the sky and become lost in the nonexistent clouds above. Violet stood on the edge, eyeing us with a wistful look in her eye and I realized she never had either. I was the chain that tied her down.

 

I ran to Violet, my clothes soaked and clinging, and saw the wistful expression in her eyes. I stood in front of her and simply reached out my hand. Indecision flickered through her eyes, the fear of letting go. I gave her an encouraging smile, holding my palm face up. She looked into my eyes, tears filling her own and she slowly lifted her hand to mine.

 

We stood in the Henryetta splash park, me looking like a drowned rat and Violet in her prim and proper outfit, her hair perfectly in place. Our fingers locked in a tight squeeze and I knew I owed this woman so much. As long as I lived, even if it was only three more days, I would never forget her incredible love for me.

 

My heart swelled with love and gratitude until it overflowed and filled my eyes with tears, falling and mingling with the sprinkler water that dripped down my face. I smiled, my chin quivering with emotion, then I tugged.

 

She was reluctant, so I eased her into it. I, of all people, knew how hard it was to give into frivolity. Violet skirted the edge of the concrete, resisting. Ashley ran over and grabbed Violet’s other hand. Mikey clapped, excited Mommy was going to play.

 

Muffy sat off to the side watching all the commotion with disinterest.

 

When I thought Violet had enough time to adjust, I yelled to Ashley, “Let’s get her wet!”

 

Ashley and I each pulled a hand and Violet screamed and protested in between bursts of laughter. She dug in her heels, leaning her bottom backward as we dragged her toward a huge spray of water spewing from a fire hydrate.

 

“No! I’ll get my hair wet!” she screamed, but this only spurred Ashley on more.

 

We got her directly under the water, Ashley and I circling our arms around her, holding her under the spray, all three of us squealing. Mikey sat at the edge giggling and clapping. “Momma! Momma!”

 

Somewhere in the park, someone turned on music. I leaned over to Ashley giving her a mischievous look. “Let’s dance!”

 

And at two o’clock in the afternoon on a hot June day, for the first time in my life, I danced. It wasn’t the romantic dance I envisioned when I wrote dance on my list, but it was so much better. I looked up into the cloudless sky, flung my arms wide open and spun in circles laughing until I cried. Violet shook her head, a tiny smile lifting the corners of her lips. I grabbed Violet’s hand, Ashley pulling the other. We danced in circles, making fools of ourselves and not caring what anyone thought, just being free.

 

My heart burst right open, right there under the rainbow spray, as I watched Violet let go of her wariness and dance and squeal with her children. Violet had given me hope and love all those years; I had given her so little in return. But that Thursday afternoon, I gave Violet something just as precious. Freedom. I set her free. When I was gone, there would be no regrets for her. Violet turned to me, Mikey on her hip and Ashley twirling around in the sprays. Pure joy radiated from her face and I couldn't contain the happiness billowing like a mushroom cloud. Another memory for my scrapbook.

 

I wiped the tears streaming down my face and ran into the water, spinning Ashley around to her delight. We played for another half an hour until Mikey looked like he was about to fall over with sleepiness. None of us were ready to go, so we changed the kids out of their wet suits and into dry clothes. We lay on the blanket under the tree, letting the warm breeze dry us. The kids fell asleep within minutes. Violet and I looked up at the leaves of the oak tree hanging over our heads, the soft rustle a soothing lullaby.