“Wait, what? Control the relationship? I never tried to control relationships, I control anything physical.”
One dark brow rose, and his lips twitched in amusement. “Trust me, Kennedy, you control relationships. You tried to control ours. If you think about it, I know you already know this.” When I shook my head, he said, “Tell me why you think you control physical times.”
“Why I think? You already know why I do.”
“Humor me, Kennedy.”
“Because I never wanted to feel like a man had control over me. I wanted to be the one to say how things went.”
“That last part is why you try to control relationships. You told me the night I met your family that you’d grown up wanting a marriage like your parents have, and a lot made sense after you told me that. The way you were before you gave up control was like you wanted to make sure our relationship was like theirs. But the second you stopped trying to make our relationship a certain way was when I knew you had fallen for me as much as I had for you. At the time, I didn’t know your parents or what you were doing, I just knew that you were right there with me for the ride instead of trying to make us something we weren’t. The night you told me about wanting what they have, I knew I’d been right.”
“I don’t—” I began, but he cut me off.
“You do. Or, you did. We’d already talked about the physical part when we were still together, so I knew that I’d been the first person who you’d let control that. But I’ve wondered for years about the rest. Because like I said, when you lost control with me I knew what our relationship meant to you. You just confirmed that you’ve never been that way with anyone else . . . except for him. So now I know what he means to you.”
I stood there completely silent, not knowing what to say. Because as much as I wanted to continue denying what he was saying, a part of me knew he was right. I had grown up wanting what my parents have, and now that Rhys had explained it to me, I could see that I had done things in my past to try to ensure I would have that kind of marriage and love—even in the smallest of relationships. But I hadn’t done any of that since the man standing in front of me had completely rocked my world.
I rocked back on my heels and shook my head once. “That doesn’t make sense now. I tried to avoid a relationship with Liam . . . and that was because of you. I didn’t want to go through what you’d put me through again, and I just knew that he had that power to crush me like you did. But I never once tried to make my relationship with him something it wasn’t. When I gave up with him, I was giving up trying to keep myself from him.”
Another sad smile pulled at Rhys’s lips. “Then I guess that tells both of us exactly what he means to you.” He watched my confused expression for a second before gesturing in the direction we’d been walking. “Come on. Let’s get all this stuff back and make Kira dinner, and we’ll stop with the heavy conversation for tonight. Deal?”
“Deal.”
THE NEXT AFTERNOON I was walking into Brian’s tattoo shop with a bag of greasy food in hand. The air in the condo had been thick with tension as Rhys, Kira, and I had absentmindedly watched TV just so we wouldn’t have to talk to each other, and soon it had been too much for me to handle. With a quick good-bye, I’d gotten in the car and driven around for almost thirty minutes before I found myself in a drive-thru buying food for Brian.
“Dude number one!” Brian called out excitedly. “To what do I owe this pleasure?”
“Why is it you don’t have an issue with figuring out which one of us is which?”
Brian looked offended. “As if I would? I had my share of twinsies before I met my lady love. I’m what everyone should call an expert.”
“Should?” I asked on a laugh. “Here, brought you something so you wouldn’t starve.”
“Glorious!” he sang out as he reached for the bag—once again like it was precious and fragile. “You here for some ink?” he asked over his shoulder as he walked to his station.
“Not today,” I said on a sigh, and took a seat. “I came for your crazy-worded wisdom. Liam said he always went to talk to you whenever anything was going on his life, so I figured I would try.”
“Smart boy.” He pointed at me and grinned cheekily. “And very smart girl! Lay it on me.”
“Has Liam been by in the last month to maybe talk to you about . . .” I trailed off, and my face twisted up as I tried to figure out how to explain the situation in as few words as possible.