We ordered pizza for dinner. When it arrived, we had to open the oven and set the box in there, because there was no space to put the box. We turned the television on to watch a movie, but much of the screen was blocked by sprigs of flowers.
“I’m staying over tonight,” Jenny announced.
I had stopped crying by then, but was drained. The life had been sucked from me. I’m glad she offered, I didn’t want to be alone. I needed to feel loved from someone. And I needed her to monitor my intercom. I was still nervous about Jay turning up at my condo.
“I’d stay too, but,” Sam looked around the room, “There’s no room with all these flowers.”
“Are you going to go to work tomorrow?”
“I don’t know, I should come back here.”
“You’ll be bombarded with questions about me, you know that, right?”
“I don’t care. You know I can handle myself. Maybe I should go in. No, I’m definitely going in. Someone’s got to be there on your side.”
My heart swelled at her words. I was so lucky to have such great friends. That’s all I need in life.
My phone beeped. It had to be Jay. I hadn’t heard from him all day. Maybe he was letting me clear my head. Maybe he thought I’d calm down and get over it. No Jay, I wouldn’t. I picked up my phone but was trembling so badly I couldn’t hit the message icon. Sam took it from my hand and opened it for me.
Let’s talk. J.
“No fucking way,” I blurted. Sam typed what I said then added several exclamation marks before hitting send. Even though he deserved much harsher words, my stomach felt queasy at the thought of him reading the text.
“There, he should get the picture,” Sam said.
We sat for a few minutes, all of us staring at the phone, but he didn’t text again.
I barely slept and often woke, only to become aware of Jenny holding me tight. Each time the weight her her arm comforted me enough to fall back asleep. At least for a short while.
She was still asleep when I awoke around six. I didn’t want to wake her, so tiptoed around the flowers and into the living room. My phone was still sitting on the coffee table from last night, and I picked it up, my heart pounding as I looked for a response from Jay. But there was none.
There’s no way I wanted anything to do with him. To ever see him again. Still, it might be nice if he groveled a bit. At least showed some regret for what he did.
I sat and absentmindedly surfed the internet on my phone, being careful to avoid any websites that might have my story. Like Buzzfeed or Perez Hilton. Man, I love those sites, but this is exactly the kind of story they love. Instead I watched a load of silly animal videos on YouTube.
Jenny appeared about an hour later.
“Hey, how are you?”
“As you’d expect.”
She sat on the sofa, squished up against me and together we watched a cat have a bath and a dog play with a bird.
“You know, you can stay here as long as you need, hiding and recovering. No one will expect anything more of you.”
“Good, I intend to. Except I have to pay my bills. How am I going to manage?”
“You don’t need to worry about that right now. Force McAllister isn’t going to stop paying you, you know that right?”
“I don’t want his money.”
“Jeez Abbie, they owe you. Take it all and don’t feel guilty. Not for one second.”
“I can’t.”
“I’m not saying do it forever, just don’t stress about money. Marla will help you find another job. Take your time and find the right one. Until then, your mortgage is covered.”
The tears started falling again. I looked at her and said, “But no one will hire me, they’ll all know this story. My reputation is ruined.”
39
By Thursday, I’d convinced Jenny she could leave me alone. That I would be okay. That Jay wasn’t going to turn up at my door.
Fortunately, I’d already done up my resume from before Calvin got fired. I debated whether to include my promotion, but realized one week in a job I’d slept my way into didn’t belong anywhere near it. I sent it off to Marla and waited.
Maybe I should leave Chicago. Start over some place new. I could go somewhere warm, like Miami or LA. But Jenny was right. There was no hurry, I could take my time. I had to take my time, to make sure I made the right decision instead of rushing into something stupid and making things even worse.
Except there was nothing to rush. Marla didn’t get any nibbles let alone any bites. Each day the weight in the pit of my stomach grew and grew. I cast my net wider, sending out my resume to every online job site I could find.