When I break the threshold, I see James and a few others in the back by our pool table. No Jake. When I scan the bar area, I finally spot him sitting on a stool, talking to old man Jack at the end of the bar. He’s in the farthest seat from the door. Before I can chicken out, I head over and sit in the empty seat to his left.
“Hey, Jack. Slow night?”
“Eh, it’s still early,” he says as he slides a draft beer in front of me. Jack gives me an encouraging little nod and walks over to the other side of the bar to help other patrons.
“What are you doing here?” Jake says without looking up from his mug of beer.
“Saw your truck and thought I’d stop in.” We don’t say anything for a few minutes, both of us drinking our beers while I try to figure out what to say. Since he hasn’t gotten up and walked away yet or thrown me off my stool, I decide to take a shot at fixing our broken friendship.
“You know, Jake, I never wanted to hurt you.” He doesn’t say anything so I decide to forge ahead. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but your sister means more to me than anyone ever has. I tried to fight my attraction to her for awhile, but there’s just something about her. I’m drawn to her. And I’d never do anything to intentionally hurt her.”
“Sounds like you already did.”
I let out a long sigh. He’s right and it kills me to know that I’m the reason she’s hurting. “Yeah, I did. I walked away from her instead of fighting for her because I was hurt and afraid. That’s on me, and I regret it more than anything.”
“Why’d you do it? Why’d you walk, man?” Jake spins to his left and is looking me in the eyes for the first time in weeks.
“Because I was pissed. She assumed that I was seeing someone else the entire time I was seeing her. It pissed me off that she didn’t trust me enough to just ask me without jumping to conclusions. But more than being pissed, I was scared. Scared that if I actually put my heart out there and followed through with what I was feeling for her that she’d throw it back in my face.”
“She deserves someone who will fight for her, and love her and Bean. Someone who won’t walk away when things get tough. She deserves better than you.”
I look down at my beer again. “I know she does. But she makes me a better man, and I want to be that man for her. I want to be the guy she deserves. I know I can be because I can’t picture my life without her in it.”
“Do you love her?”
I look up at Jake and stare straight into eyes that are the same crystal blue color as Avery’s. “More than I ever thought possible to love someone.”
Jake stares back at me for a few moments, not wavering or letting on to what was going through his head. After several of the longest seconds of my life, he finally reaches his right hand out and holds it halfway between us. I look down at his extended hand and put my hand in his, shaking it a few times. He smiles at me for the first time in weeks and says, “Then go get your girl, Mad. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for her and Bean. Someone who is going to love them and take care of them.”
“I want to be that guy, Jake.”
He drops my hand and reaches for his beer, “Good. And if you ever make her fucking cry again, I’ll do more than bruise up your pretty-boy face.” He smiles as he takes another drink.
I laugh. “Yeah, well if I ever do that again, you can beat the shit out of me again, and I won’t fight you.”
“So, have you seen her?” Jake asks.
“No. I drove by a couple of times and wanted to pull in, but I knew I needed to get all my shit together before I did. I was hoping to call her maybe this weekend.”
“We’re working all weekend. And besides, Mom mentioned when I was at the bakery today that Bean’s got that cough again.”
I spin on my stool to look at him. “Brooklyn’s sick again? Does she have another fever?” I ask, my voice full of concern.
“Yeah, I guess. Mom said Avery was off again today trying to get her into the doctor. I haven’t heard how it went though. I guess Mom and Will were both taking turns going over to her house to help with Bean so she could get a little work in.”
“Have you talked to Avery yet?”
“Yeah, I ran into her at the bakery earlier in the week. She wouldn’t let me leave without fighting it out. Gave all the customers a good show,” Jake said with a chuckle. “Stubborn ass woman. I have no clue where she gets it from.”
“Right, no clue, huh?”
“None. Wait, I think she gets it from Nate.” We both laugh at that, and for the first time in weeks, I have my best friend back. We sit on the bar stools for another hour and a half, not drinking anymore because we both work this weekend, but talking about everything we’ve missed in each other’s lives over the past few weeks.