He grabbed for her hand. “It’s a start.”
Was it her imagination or did his words sound like a plea for understanding? But she couldn’t sleep with him and not have her emotional needs fulfilled too.
“I thought so too. But no more.” She lifted her arms to his shoulders and pushed him away. He let her, backing off because she’d asked. Ironically, a part of her wished he’d press the issue and not allow her to withdraw so easily.
Her wish went unanswered and a chill washed over her as he placed emotional and physical distance between them.
“Go ahead. Get some sleep,” he said in a rough voice. “It’s late.” He gestured toward her room—the guest room on the other side of the house. Far from his bedroom. Far from him.
She’d been hoping he’d understand everything she’d said tonight, and realized she’d been wishing for the impossible. Disappointment filled her—disappointment in him for his unwillingness to try and disappointment in herself for caring so much that he’d let her down.
She started for her room, and when she felt his burning gaze on her back, she turned around. “Kevin... ”
“What?”
“I just want you to know I’ll be out most of the day tomorrow. I’ll be back sometime after dinner.” She’d finally heard back from her guidance counselor. He had numerous options to discuss, and Nikki had convinced Janine to drive her back up to school to work out an arrangement that would enable her to graduate. Then maybe she’d find a private position that had some kind of day care.
She braced herself for the inevitable argument. Instead he merely shrugged his shoulders. “Suit yourself. You will anyway.”
If she could close the distance between them, she’d do it in a heartbeat. But the next move wasn’t hers to make.
THIRTEEN
Kevin pulled into the parking lot to Dr. Molloy’s private office and shifted the gearshift to park. “This is standard?” he asked Nikki.
“For the fifth time, yes. It’s my monthly appointment.”
“And you’re feeling okay?” He’d been so wrapped up in himself and Max lately that Nikki’s health had taken a backseat.
“Perfectly fine. If I wasn’t you’d have heard about it. We live in the same house, after all.”
But they barely communicated. Funny how he’d miss something he’d never really had. Nikki was sleeping beside him, but not with him. He sensed in his gut the next move was his, but damned if he knew how to make it or bridge the gap that was of his own making. He didn’t let her into his life, so she didn’t let him into her body. Somehow it didn’t seem like a fair exchange.
“You ready?” he asked.
She nodded and minutes later, they were ushered into a small but modern-looking room. Immaculately clean and antiseptic-smelling, the examining room was a far cry from the dilapidated one downtown. And though Nikki got the same care from the same doctor, he couldn’t help but be grateful she’d given in on this point and allowed him to foot the bill for private practice. At least he could feel like he was taking care of his family in a way that counted.
His family. Before he could process that thought, the door opened and Dr. Molloy entered.
She glanced at Nikki. “It’s good to see you again, Nicole.” Then she turned toward Kevin. “Mr. Manning. I’m glad to see you two have worked things out.”
“I’d be foolish to turn down good medical care, Dr. Molloy.” Nikki smiled, but Kevin wasn’t fooled by her affable demeanor. As a general rule, she barely said two words to him without him prompting her first. This morning’s “I have a doctor appointment at noon, remember?” was the longest sentence to pass from her lips.
He hadn’t forgotten but he was grateful she’d included him on her own. Otherwise he’d have to resort to caveman tactics again, and he didn’t relish another scene in front of the good doctor.
“Well, I wasn’t talking about using my private practice instead of the clinic,” she said wryly. “But I think you made a wise decision. Now let’s get started. Nikki, since this is a routine monthly visit, you don’t need to undress. Just let me see that stomach and you’ll be out of here before you know it.”
Kevin watched as the doctor readied a small machine. With barely a glance in his direction, Nikki lifted her shirt to reveal her pale, rounded stomach.
He walked around to the side of the examining table and reached for her hand. Her protest was minimal—a slight resistant tug against his hand, but when he refused to release her, she stilled.
“Everything okay?” Dr. Molloy asked her. “Any unusual symptoms, questions?”