“Night,” he muttered, knowing she was right. And not knowing what the hell to do about it.
He let Mrs. Reid out. Following instinct, he made his way toward Nikki’s room. She’d left the hall light burning but her room was dark. Kevin walked down the brightly lit hall toward the door, open just a crack. With any other woman, he’d consider it an invitation. But Nikki had never resorted to playing games.
Even the night she’d shown up on his doorstep, she hadn’t been shy about what she wanted. He stepped into the room, his gaze drawn to the figure in the bed. He walked closer. Her even breathing told him she was asleep.
He ought to turn and go. He’d done his duty. He’d checked and she was fine. He could leave her in peace. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to walk out. Instead he sat beside her on the double bed, careful not to move the mattress and wake her up. As if of its own volition, his hand moved, and he smoothed the dark hair off her forehead.
She stirred, rolling toward him. So much for good intentions, he thought.
“Kevin?” she murmured, her voice groggy with sleep.
“Right here.”
Her eyes opened slowly, and her gaze met his. Surprise warred with pleasure. Pleasure she quickly stifled and he felt its loss. “What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Just wanted to make sure you were okay.” It was too late to remove his hand, nor did he want to. He’d spent too much time keeping them apart but wanting more. He fingered the silken strands between his fingers.
He’d believed the only way their new living arrangement could work was if he kept his distance. He still believed that, but knew it was the selfish man’s way out. “So are you okay?” he asked.
Nikki bit down on her lower lip. She held onto Kevin’s gaze and decided, if she had any hope of happiness, that she had to be honest. “I’m fine,” she told him. “Better now that you’re here.”
His sharp inhale told her she’d hit a nerve. Well, good. It’s about time someone didn’t let Kevin off easily. All this tiptoeing around each other wasn’t good for her and wasn’t good for the baby. If she wasn’t careful she’d end up in a self-induced depression and there was no way she’d let these circumstances get her down. It meant pulling Kevin into the feeling world, kicking and screaming, but she didn’t care.
If she was going to live in his house and be around him constantly, then he was going to have to acknowledge that he wasn’t alone. That she was here, and she affected him as much as he affected her. Not that she expected anything more to come of it, she assured herself.
Perhaps this nap gave her more strength and perspective than she’d realized. Or maybe it was breaking through Mrs. Reid’s reserve, but something had changed. She was pregnant, she was happy about it, and she wasn’t going to let confinement get to her. She was going to live, and drag Kevin along with her.
“I can’t stay.”
She pushed herself higher against the pillows. “Why? Do you have important reruns to watch on television? Push-ups to do that can’t wait?”
A grin edged the sides of his mouth. “You aren’t going to make this easy on me, are you?”
“Why should I? I’m living in your house and having your baby. What about this is easy for me?”
“You’re too smart for your own good, Nicole.”
She laughed. “No, just too stubborn for yours. Stay with me,” she said, knowing she’d be catching him off guard. “Please.” She added the latter for good measure.
He leaned forward and studied her with his intense, dark-eyed gaze. She caught a whiff of his masculine scent and her insides curled with a rush of pleasure. By asking him to stay, she realized she was torturing herself with what she couldn’t have, and yet she wanted nothing more than to wake up with Kevin beside her.
“Mrs. Reid says you’re lonely.”
“It’s a combination of things. Boredom is one of them, but she’s right. I’m lonely. In here.” She tapped on her chest right above her heart. “It’s hard to explain. Maybe some of it’s hormonal, what with the baby and all—but...”
He narrowed his eyes as she spoke, absorbing every word. “Go on.”
“We created this life together. But when I found out I was pregnant I didn’t want to burden you. I planned on doing this on my own, but you pushed and pushed until you became a part of things. And now... here I am. But we’re further apart than ever.”
He let out a groan. “You know what I am, what I’m capable of. Isn’t it better if we just...”
“Shut up and lie down, will you?” She patted the bed beside her. Nikki wasn’t in the mood to hear how they were better off operating separately, how she shouldn’t put her faith in him because he’d let her down. She was tired of the argument, tired of the knowledge, and all she wanted was his shoulder to lean on for just one night.