Truly Madly Deeply Boxed Set(139)

“You know, this all strikes me as hypocritical. You weren’t willing to talk when I needed you. Why should I open up to you now?”

“Because after all these years, you came to me. And because after all these years, you deserve an explanation. Whether your mother approves or not.”

“I’m not sure if I do or not, but it needs to be said,” Anne said as she walked into the room. The three of them faced each other—three individuals who hadn’t been a family for too long.

Anne’s early return caught Carly by surprise, and she glanced at her father’s guilty face. He’d called her mother home for this meeting. Well, better all at once than one at a time, she supposed. Still, her stomach churned in nervous anticipation.

Anne sat on the couch and Roger joined her, clasping her hand in his. Carly narrowed her eyes, seeing reality as if for the first time. Had her parents done more than made peace with their lives? Had they truly come together after all this time? Carly shook her head. They’d obviously done more than made peace, but it hadn’t happened overnight. She’d just closed them out of her life and shut her eyes to the progress they’d made in the years following the scandal and her lonely childhood.

Carly sat alone. She faced her parents, who now sat together on the sofa, united in a way she hadn’t understood until now.

“We didn’t talk about things because I insisted. I thought if we just put it behind us, it would go away.” Anne fiddled with a ring on her hand, twisting it in a nervous gesture.

“If you don’t acknowledge things, they can’t hurt you,” Carly murmured in repetition of the phrase her mother had ingrained in her over the years. Only now did Carly realize that that philosophy had taught her to avoid personal confrontation and dealing with reality.

“And I went along,” her father continued. “I’d promised. The only way your mother would take me back was to pretend it never happened. After all I’d put her though, that one request wasn’t too much to ask.” He met Carly’s gaze. “I see now I was wrong. We were wrong. In saving our marriage, we made you the victim.”

His words were so on target that a lump rose to Carly’s throat and remained there.

“But not on purpose.” Anne came up beside Carly and knelt down beside her. “I thought I was protecting you. Honest to goodness, I believed I was doing the right thing for us all.”

Carly blinked back tears. “I know you did.” Although nothing could change the past, at least they were talking now. “But I have to know something.”

Anne swallowed hard. “Anything,” she said, and Carly understood for the first time how difficult that word was for her mother to say.

“Did you love each other once?” she asked in a small voice that sounded so childlike, it was pitiful. But she knew for certain she’d walk out of this room a much stronger person than she had been coming in.

“I always loved your father,” Anne said slowly. “And he loved me.”

Carly cleared her throat and turned to her father. “Then... why?” Why have an affair? Why go looking outside his marriage for something they’d started out with from the beginning?

Her father nodded, seeming to understand without hearing the rest of the words. “I can answer that.”

“No. I will. Because I didn’t know how to show that love and I drove him away with silence and lack of communication.”

“But I shouldn’t have strayed. I should have tried harder to make things work. Spent more time at home and less time focusing on my career. It shouldn’t have taken an affair and a tragedy to set us on the right course.”

They each accepted blame. They’d each come to terms with their lives. It seemed only Carly continued to live in past shadows. “And you are? On the right course, I mean?” Carly asked.

Her mother had reseated herself on the couch and her father grabbed for Anne’s hand. “We’ve been in counseling for years. Each time we tried to make an overture, you turned us away. We didn’t blame you, but we couldn’t figure out a way to make things right for you either.”

Carly smiled. “Because it wasn’t your job. I’m a grown-up, and I chose to be ruled by the past.” But not anymore.

“We’re so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

She shook her head, then wiped the tears that dripped down her face. “You know, we’re all to blame in a way. But...”

“I want to start over,” Anne said. “I know it’s too late to be the mother you should have had, but I want more than we’ve had lately. It’s selfish, but...”