True for You(49)
“What do you need me for? Because I’m pretty sure sitting around here, doing nothing, isn’t helpful.”
“Classes start soon,” he says.
“They won’t start until summer,” I point out. “Besides, I’m not paying for them. You are.”
“When you’re done, get a job and pay me back. Problem solved.” He scoots closer to me, taking my book out of my hand and setting it down carefully. “Maybe you could read to me one night. Cameron says reading out loud is very helpful.”
“How would you know what Cameron has to say?” I snap.
“Because I called him on the way over here to make sure I didn’t say something ignorant or hurtful. Sometimes he knows what he’s talking about.”
A tiny bit of my anger melts away. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do after classes are finished.” I don’t know what I’m supposed to do at all. All I ever wanted was a family. However, the longer I stay married to Jackson, the less like family he feels, because it seems like he’s found a new family with June and his music.
Only how can I say that to him without sounding selfish or unreasonable? He had his career before we ever got together, and I knew how important it was to him. So, none of this should be a surprise.
But it doesn’t stop the pain in my heart.
“Whatever you want.”
“Stop being so agreeable.”
“Nope.”
I growl at him. “That’s not funny.”
“Why don’t you come out with me tonight, to a bar downtown? June invited us.”
“She invited you, not me.”
A slow grin kicks up the corners of his mouth. “Same thing, as far as I’m concerned.”
“Did anything happen while I was gone?”
He nods. “I figured out a few things, but I’m still working on some others.”
My heart almost stops in my chest. “And those would be?”
His phone vibrates and he pulls it out, his brows crashing together. “Violet.”
*** *** ***
Jackson
“I have to take this call.” Damn it. I don’t want to take this call. Bliss and I need to finish our talk. She needs to tell me what’s bothering her and what I can do to fix it. But Violet… “She never calls me, so it has to be important.”
Hurt flashes in Bliss’ eyes and I want to take back the words, but Violet picks up before I can apologize or explain myself.
“Jackson?”
Her voice sounds off. “What’s wrong?”
Bliss grabs her book and leaves the room, taking my heart with her. Son of a bitch!
“Nothing’s wrong. It’s just—no. I can do this. Promise.” She’s speaking to my brother. More than likely he’s pissed that she’s even calling me.
“Does Cole need another concert for his bar?”
“What? Oh that, no.” She clears her throat. “Actually, I want to, um…”
“I’m right here, no matter what,” I hear my brother say,
“I’m having a memorial service, for the, my, our… for the baby. I need closure, and I thought you might like that, too.”
Closure. For a child that I never knew, never knew existed, until after the fact? Regardless, once I found out, I had been devastated. Unable to comprehend that something I had helped create in love had been killed in a matter of minutes, by one girl’s decision to drive drunk.
Not drunk—she’d been drugged out of her mind by some sicko waiter testing out a new date-rape drug, but I hadn’t know it at the time, and I hadn’t stopped her from driving.
I rub my jaw, tug at my ear, and clear my throat a couple of times before trusting myself to speak again.
“When?”
“Tomorrow, two o’clock, at my nana’s church. I know it’s last minute, but I had debated on asking you, but Cole said I should at least give you the choice.”
“My brother—Cole said that?”
“Yes.” I can hear the smile in her voice. “He’s all about choices. Seriously, Jackson, if you can’t or don’t feel comfortable… it won’t hurt my feelings if you choose not to come.”
For about a second, I debate bringing Bliss with me, but the subject of kids isn’t the best one for us. Maybe this is exactly what I need to help me decide and have an honest conversation with her, without my past clouding my judgment or clawing into my heart.
“I’ll be there.”
“Thank you,” she breathes into the phone.
After we say a quick good-bye, I go to find Bliss. Maybe we need to go out, as a couple, have a good time, and then talk some more. Though I doubt Bliss feels like going anywhere with me after I took that call.