"Oh my God." I shook my head, angry and hurt at the same time.
"Sorry," said the other guy. "Tough break. For what it's worth, I think you're way hotter than that Lilith girl."
Nice. Wonderful.
Fuming, I went back to Jude's car. I filled him in. "They're at Rachel Kline's," I said.
"Oh right," he said. "I totally forgot about that."
"So did I," I said. "You asked me if I wanted to go on Sunday."
"Seems like five years ago," said Jude. "It's been quite a week."
"Yeah," I said. It had been.
"So I guess we're going to Rachel's?" Jude asked.
"I guess so," I said. I couldn't believe Jason was going to a party. Was this some way of getting back at me for going to parties without him all the time? I hadn't realized it bothered him so much.
"Could be fun," said Jude. "It's a party, after all."
Fun? Doubt it. And maybe I'd just been fooling myself all this time, thinking that I went out to so many parties and drank so much because I wanted to cut loose and be free. Truthfully, I thought I might just be running from everything that had happened. I didn't want to face what had happened to me. I didn't want to face who I'd become. But I wasn't a crazy party girl. I was a girl who'd fought off a serial rapist. I was a girl who'd faced down the Sons of the Rising Sun. I was girl who could load a gun and flick off the safety. I was a girl who loved a boy more than life itself. I was me. There wasn't any running from it. Not anymore. I had to be myself. Own up to it.
But I smiled weakly. "Party time," I said.
Jude laughed. He started the car. "You sound so enthused."
As he pulled out of the parking lot, Jude got his phone out of his pocket. "I'm going to give a couple of the guys from work a call and tell them I'm going out to the party, okay?"
I listened while he relayed our destination over the phone and gave directions to Rachel's house. It didn't take long to drive out to Rachel's house. It was close to town. Once there, we had trouble finding a parking space since the entire street was glutted with cars, and they were taking up every possible place to park. Finally, we parked maybe three blocks away and had to walk all the way back to the party.
Rachel's house was one of those McMansions that populate the Sarasota-Bradenton area. Easily worth a half-million dollars, it sprawled amongst houses of the same size in a crowded, planned neighborhood. Inside, there was a lot of space, but not a lot of rooms. The foyer had high ceilings and a large chandelier. Overall, however, the house was a regular three bedroom house. Just a fancy one, with big windows and walk-in closets.
Rachel's parents were out of town for the weekend, and it seemed that everyone in BayshoreHigh School knew that. The party was packed. Bodies writhed in the living room, dancing to a pulsing stereo. In the foyer, kids chatted in groups, clutching bottles of beer or plastic cups filled with sugary mixed drinks. The kitchen was similarly crowded. There were puddles of alcohol on the floor. There were stains on the carpet. I didn't see Rachel Kline anywhere. I wondered if she were worried about the fact that her house was being destroyed by the entire student body.
Because the party was so packed, I couldn't find Jason or Lilith. Jude and I made a search of each of the rooms in the lower level of the house. The living room. The foyer. The kitchen. The den. The line to the downstairs bathroom. They were nowhere to be found. Had they actually come to the party? What if they were somewhere else? Together?
Alone?
The thought made me feel nauseated.
"Where are they?" I wondered aloud.
"Should we check upstairs?" Jude asked.
Upstairs? Like . . . in a bedroom? I gulped. If that's where they were, did I want to know?
I chewed on my lip, trying to work up the courage to mount the steps and look. But I didn't have to, because I saw Jason coming out of the kitchen, the plastic cup he held sloshing liquid all over the floor.
Jude touched my shoulder. "You want me to stick around while you talk to him? For moral support?"
I shook my head. "It's probably better if you don't. He doesn't much like you, if you hadn't noticed."
Jude nodded. "I'll be around," he said. "Find me if you need a ride or anything." And then he disappeared into the throng of bodies surrounding us.
I pushed my way through them to Jason.
Jason looked surprised when he recognized me. "What are you doing here, Azazel?" he asked.
"I'm looking for you," I said. "I have something I need to tell you."
He took a long swig of his drink.