I feel the fur-wrapped fish leave my hands, and a little noise escapes my throat. I will not open my eyes though—I refuse to watch her go away. I hold my breath and wait for her footsteps to be out of my range of hearing, but I hear no steps at all.
There is a soft, light touch of fingertips on the edge of my jaw.
“Ehd,” she whispers. Her finger trails over the tip of my nose, and my entire body shudders as I finally look at her. She makes more soft sounds as she crouches down in front of me and balances on the balls of her feet. I still feel like I’m melting, but this time I am melting into her—into her face, her eyes, her touch. We look at each other in silence for a moment before she huffs out a long breath. Her fingers run over my cheek and across my jaw again, and more soft noises come from her mouth.
I still don’t like the noise too much, but at least the sounds aren’t loud. I am more confused now than I was before though. Why isn’t she leaving? She obviously doesn’t want me, so why hasn’t she left? She must have other people nearby because it would be too dangerous for her to be alone.
Alone.
I whimper as she makes more sounds, and she keeps touching my face. I don’t ever want her to stop. The feel of her fingers moving through the short hairs of my beard is indescribable but also makes me wonder: Does she think I am not old enough to be her mate? My beard is not thick like an older man’s would be.
Her thumb runs over my nose again, and her lower lip disappears behind her teeth. She utters more quiet sounds, and my name-sound is among them again. Her eyes are as soft as the sounds she makes, and I start to doubt.
I doubt everything. Everything I have thought since I first laid eyes on her at the bottom of the pit I dug to hunt antelope is uncertain now, and I have to try to figure it out.
Did she not mean it when she hit my nose?
Will she still be my mate?
Do I not have to be alone?
“Beh?”
I have to know for sure. Does she accept me as her mate or not? Did she react too quickly because of whatever I did to upset her but didn’t really mean what she did? Is that what she is telling me now?
I have to know.
Her hand doesn’t leave the side of my face as I rise up on my knees and reach out to touch her face as well. I am a little surprised when she doesn’t pull away from me, and with trembling fingers, I place my other hand on the other side of her face. I lean forward slowly until the tip of my nose touches hers. Her eyes close, and I can feel the stiffness in her arms, her nervousness coming through in her posture and muscle tension, but she doesn’t move away.
Very, very slowly, I run the tip of my nose all the way up to her forehead and then back again. I can feel the warmth of her breath against my mouth as I stop and pull back a bit, looking into her clear blue eyes and hoping against all hope that this means she is going to accept me after all.
I’m not going to guess what she might be thinking—not anymore. I will not risk making another mistake and angering her. I want her; I know I do. It is far beyond not wanting to be alone anymore. I want her—only her.
I will do anything to make Beh mine.
I take a deep breath and let it out again. Beh smiles at me as she lets go of my face and places her hands over mine. She pulls me away from her and we slowly stand together with her hands holding mine. She looks out to the lake and sighs heavily.
I move closer and lean down so I can touch her nose with mine again. Beh’s eyes close as I do, and I can see the corners of her mouth turn up a little at the same time. I reach back up and place my hand on the side of her face before I run my nose up one side of hers and then down the other.
This time when my skin meets hers, her shoulders are more relaxed, and she does not seem as nervous. I lay my head on her shoulder, tilting my face toward her neck so I can run my nose along her throat, too. I inhale slowly, taking in the scent of her. It’s different than it was the previous day; the scent of fruit is muted now, nearly gone. As I turn toward her hairline, the fragrance is more noticeable but still much weaker than before.
I feel her hand on the back of my head but only for a moment before she takes a step back and brings her hands up to my wrist to break my hold on her. I watch intently as Beh takes my hand, turns me so I am facing the tree line away from the lake, and then makes more sounds. Her finger points toward the trees, but I don't see anything there when I look. I turn my head back toward her, but she takes my head in her hands and turns it back to the forest again.
She does this again before I realize she doesn't want me to look at her.
What does she think I will see?
She makes no sense at all.
I glance at her eyes and can see the frustration in them. It is the same look she gave me this morning when she needed to relieve herself, and she wouldn’t do it until I had turned my back to her. Does she not want me to see her body? Why not? Is there something wrong with it, and she is embarrassed?