“Can I have a hamburger and a milk shake and onion rings?” Rose said, reminding me that I’d fed her nothing except candy from the motel vending machine since I’d yanked her away from the demonic ceremony early that morning. Save her, then starve her. So much for my amazing skill at nurturing. Wouldn’t Mom be proud?
Since I’d been living off Kit Kat bars, too, I ordered the same thing Rose was having, then leaned back and sipped my coffee, trying to decide what to make of my new partner. She slid over until her back was against the wall, then kicked her feet up, her boots landing with a thunk on the tabletop. From two tables over, the waitress glared, but Kiera lazily lifted her hand, then shot her the finger. Then she rolled her head over and looked at me. “I really do try to be good, you know? I mean, my boy Clarence handed me this whole big chance to get my shit together, and you’d think I’d be a little more prissy sweet girl about the whole thing. But that’s just not me.”
A burly cook started to walk in our direction, and she exhaled loudly, then swung her feet to the ground and sat up straight. “Sometimes I wonder if with what we do, redemption’s even really possible.”
I licked my lips, wary. “What do you mean?”
She eyed Rose, and I nodded. “It’s okay. She knows.” Not entirely true. I had yet to have the talk with Rose. But under the circumstances, I think Rose had picked up on the salient details.
“Just all the killing,” Kiera said. “I mean, shit, yeah, we’re whacking demons, but it’s still heavy-duty, you know?”
“Yeah,” I said, because I knew exactly what she was talking about. At the same time, I didn’t believe a word she was saying. I mean, sure. Maybe Clarence had paired me with a partner who’d been duped just like I’d been—who thought she was out there fighting bad guys so that St. Peter would open those pearly gates up wide. Maybe Clarence would do that, but I didn’t believe it.
I hooked an arm around Rose and pulled her close, pretending to focus on comforting my sister. Mostly, though, I just wanted the chance to check Kiera out. She looked human enough, but I knew better than to assume anything. The second demon I’d killed had not only looked human, she’d had Rose’s big, innocent eyes. And although that had thrown me for a loop, there hadn’t been a single speck of humanity in her.
I wondered if there was any in Kiera. I thought of my hands—of my visions. I could figure it out, I knew. All I had to do was touch, and look. But she’d know I was in there, poking around. I couldn’t sneak into minds like a thief in the night. Instead, my entrances were like home invasions, rousting the mind’s owner and making my presence very well-known.
There had to be a way to fix that. Because if I could figure out a way to sneak in, I’d be in that much better position to protect Rose, not to mention myself.
And, I thought, I could finally learn the truth about Deacon.
I frowned, then looked down at the tabletop, fearful my thoughts would reflect on my face. The truth was, I felt bad—even disloyal—to still keep Deacon at arm’s length. After all, he was the reason I knew the truth about Clarence, about everything, and the old Lily would have hopped on the Deacon train, no questions asked.
The new Lily was more cautious, though. The new Lily had been seriously burned and wasn’t inclined to be scorched again.
“So what’s your story?” I asked, figuring that at least some bit of truth would filter through the bullshit.
She grabbed the saltshaker and spun it on the table, making a pattern of salt on the Formica. “Typical, I guess. I was arrogant and angry and messed up in the head. Did a lot of drugs. Fucked for money. A lot of breaking and entering—I’m great at B-and-E—and I’d fence whatever shit I stole. One night, I’d been out drinking, you know? Ended up on the road. Some jerk cut me off. Got pissed. Gunned it. The next thing I knew, both our cars were going over and over, then I felt this pop in my neck.”
I realized I was holding my breath. “You died.”
“So they tell me. And it wasn’t pretty. Where I ended up, I mean.” She shivered a little, her eyes cutting away from mine. Then she shoved the saltshaker away and drew her hands through her short hair. “Anyway, when I woke up, I was in the hospital, and Clarence was there. He said I was getting a second chance.”
“Wait a sec,” I said. “You woke up in your own body?”
She looked at me like I was from Mars. “Uh, yeah.”
“What about your parents? Your friends?”
She lifted a shoulder. “Haven’t seen my parents since I was fifteen, so going on ten years now. Still see my friends sometimes, but we have a different groove going on now, you know?”