“We said we’d work things out as we went along and … ”
“You’re about to walk out the door for two days and you want to talk about living together?” Pulling away from him, she added, “Everything’s been fine the way it is. You were the one who said we should just enjoy what we had and not try to overthink things.”
“All I’m suggesting … ”
“I know what you’re suggesting. But I don’t know why you’re bringing it up now.” She could feel tears beginning to form and she swallowed hard to keep them from falling.
“What’s going on, Margo? Why’re you crying?”
She moved to the farthest corner of the couch. “Okay, it’s been good for the past week. But it’s not real. Our real lives are three thousand miles apart. On top of that, we have careers with time schedules that don’t mesh very well. I don’t know if we can even find jobs in the same place.”
“Those are the same things about geography and careers you’ve brought up before, things we can work at fixing. I don’t buy that’s what’s bothering you. What’s this really about?”
She was silent, twisting a ring on her right hand, not looking at him. Finally she did. “Do you remember much about the year of my father’s trial?”
“Your father’s trial? What does that have to do with … ?”
“What my father did always has something to do with how I look at things, Tony, don’t you know that? It was an awful year, except for your kindness that summer.”
“I don’t remember being kind. I remember kissing a beautiful girl in a bikini.”
“Great. You didn’t take that any more seriously than you’re taking this.”
“This is how I take things seriously, Margo. I thought you knew … ”
“Okay, you’re taking it seriously. It’s another one of those things that keep tripping me up. Somehow I keep expecting you to be, I don’t know, like … ”
“You?”
“Maybe that’s part of it. We approach things so differently. I think everything through from every angle before I make a decision. You jump in. You had this amazing family life growing up. I had none to speak of and ran away from what I did have like I was being chased by demons from hell.”
“You left Philly because of your family? I thought you wanted to see what the West Coast was like.”
“I didn’t leave Philly. I escaped. I gave up Yale and Columbia and Princeton and every place I was accepted to go to college, the places I’d dreamed of going all through high school, to go to the University of Washington, so I could get away from being Kenny Keyes’ daughter. From being Daisy Keyes.”
“Who the hell is Daisy Keyes?”
“That’s what my grandmother called me. That’s who I pictured myself as. Daisy Keyes was a sad nothing, powerless over her own life, at the mercy of the people around her who were in control — my father, the prosecutors, the press.”
She ran her hand through her hair and looked directly at him. “I killed Daisy on that plane to Seattle and swore I’d always be in control of my life. And I’ve made good on that promise.” She dropped her eyes. “I won’t go back to being Daisy again. Not for anyone. Not even for you.”