To Love Honour and Disobey(15)

He stood, unable to keep from moving a moment longer. He couldn't think  any more. Couldn't do anything but bow to instinct. He knelt on the bed,  leaned over her, pressing her back against the pillows so she was in no  doubt of his need.

And her hands lifted, fingers wide as she put her palms to his scalp and  pulled him closer still. Her mouth opened beneath his and she kissed  him with the same sort of desperation he was drowning in.

And for a moment, just a moment, he was sorry she hadn't asked for more.

This was it, wasn't it-the searing attraction, the need for that deep  indulgence? Despite everything it was still at the centre of it all.  Nothing less, nothing more.

Ana's breath took for ever to regulate, and only moments after it had,  she shifted in his arms, woke him, roused him again. Determined this  time, to get it right and see it to the end. Because at the back of her  mind the clock was ticking-Africa was all they had. When they said  goodbye to the heat, they said goodbye to each other.

And she knew she had the strength to do that. This past year had shown her she had the strength to handle anything-even him.

She was glad he knew. Had never thought she'd feel that, but his  sensitivity had surprised her. She'd appreciated the comfort of his arms  as she'd cried. And she'd seen the hurt in him too-somehow that had  helped soothe her own. She wasn't alone in her sadness for the baby any  more-he felt it; he understood something of it. And that was enough to  make it that little bit more bearable.                       
       
           



       

They spent the day swimming, sleeping. Not talking of anything but  commonplaces, playing bao, keeping it light. And yet they turned to each  other even more frequently than before. The passion fast, hungry and  still never enough.

The tiny island was exquisite and offered every comfort, yet with the  luxury came other facilities-phone, fax, email. In the late afternoon  she watched him take his PDA over to the office. Yes. Real life was  going to have to intrude-they couldn't avoid the future for ever. She  went to their banda, giving him the space to get his messages in  private. She didn't want to know, didn't want to become involved in his  life back in London. The separation was looming and it was best to start  distancing now. But when he walked in twenty minutes later his  expression was too grim for her to ignore. 'Bad news?'

He pressed a button and tossed the gadget onto the table by the bed. 'Dad reckons he's getting married again.'

'No way. Who to?' Ana gaped.

'What with Mum going for the fourth last year, they're just a joke.' He  flopped back on the bed and pressed the heels of his hands into his  eyes. 'I can't believe it. And it's happening Saturday. This Saturday.'  He groaned. 'So soon-why the hell is he in such a rush?'

The giggle just bubbled from her. 'Like father, like son, I guess.'

'What?' He lifted his head up and then grinned-sort of. 'Oh, yeah. But that's not – '

'Yeah.' Not real. She watched him clearly struggle with the news. 'Does it really matter, Seb?'

'I can understand them having lovers-fine,' he said, throwing his arms  wide on the bed. 'Have as many as they want. But what's with all the  weddings?'

'You don't think it's kind of romantic?'

'No. It's desperate.'

'Seb-'

'Look, you haven't been ring-bearer too many times over.' He sat up. 'It's tacky.'

'So it's all frills and fifty bridesmaids?'

'Ugh,' he groaned again, but eventually it turned into a laugh. 'Depends. No two are ever the same.'

'Have you met this bride?'

'Briefly.' He shook his head. 'I didn't think it was serious. But I  guess he was one behind Mum on the wedding count so he had to catchup.'

'You're kidding.'

'No. Allocation of assets, experiences-they've got to make sure they have exactly the same.'

'But there was only one of you. How did they go about sharing you?'

He looked at her, shrugged in a helpless, resigned kind of way. And instead of answering, he asked, 'Ana … ?'

She knew what he wanted. And she gave it.

When she woke late the next morning she found he was already dressed and looking distant.

'You'd better pack your bag, Ana. We're leaving at lunchtime.'

So that explained why he'd barely let her rest through the night. Why  he'd woken her time and time again with his incredible caresses. The  hour had chimed.

Mentally, he'd already left, his mind miles away as he stared out over  the water-clearly not seeing the beauty of it, judging by the size of  the frown on his face. Was his problem still his father? She didn't ask;  Africa was at an end and she needed to withdraw, too-to handle it with  maturity. It was the contract they'd agreed.

Ten minutes later she stood on the deck and watched him swimming,  tireless strong strokes as he went back and forth parallel to the beach.  She was fascinated.

And then she cursed her idiocy. She wasn't going to stand all morning  staring at him. So she went to the main complex, quite determined to  find something to do to fill in the few hours till they left. She found  the perfect distraction in the beauty spa.

'Where have you been?' He looked grumpy as she strode to where he waited by the boat, the bags already stowed.

'I went for a massage.'

'I'd have given you one.'

She shook her head and laughed. 'You know we're over that.'

He met her gaze for a moment and then looked away. She stood on the  boat, smiled and waved to Hamim and then turned her back to the island.  Determined to look ahead-in everything.

Only hours later Seb led the way onto the big plane. Ana had never flown  first class before and looked around at the amazing space.

'We could have gone another class up.' He watched her investigate all the things in the toiletry bag.

'There's another class?'

'Beyond first class we could have had our own suite.' He looked wistful. 'Big bed and everything. But it was booked.'                       
       
           



       

Thank goodness for that. She'd already mentally resigned herself to the  fact she'd slept with him for the last time. And after what she'd let  the beautician on Mnemba do this morning, there was no way she wanted  him to see her even partially naked. It had been a good method of  restraint.

He read her expression with grim humour. 'You don't want to join the mile-high club with me?'

'Not today.' It wasn't even a lie. Then she saw his surprise turn to  determination. Felt his shift towards her as the atmosphere between them  thickened to intimate. 'No, Seb, we've left Africa.'

'We're still in its airspace, aren't we?'

'No.' They were over it and she was not, not, succumbing again.

Their luggage was the first on the carousel-one of the perks of spending  ridiculous amounts of money on seats that became surprisingly  comfortable beds. Not that he'd slept a wink of the flight. She  pre-empted his move to take her bag, swinging it nonchalantly onto a  trolley. He felt super grumpy now.

She turned to him 'Thanks-'

'I've ordered a cab.' He cut her off. 'It should be there by now.'

'Um … I'll be OK-'

'For heaven's sake, Ana, at least let me see you safely to your place.'

They walked to the rank and he climbed into the cab after her. 'You're staying with Phil?' he asked shortly.

'Yes.'

A flare of jealousy spiked into Seb's chest. Stupid. He wasn't surprised  Phil hadn't said she'd been staying with him. His loyalty was greater  to Ana than to him. But it annoyed him nonetheless. If Phil had been  honest he might have got to Ana before she'd gone to Africa. Hell, how  long had she been staying there?

Added to that, the thought of those two guys sitting either side of her  on the sofa drinking their soy decaff lattes or whatever namby-pampy  juice was flavour of the month, listening to her pour heart and soul out  to them, got his hackles on end. She'd talk to them as she didn't to  him. God, had Phil known about the baby-his baby?

The cab pulled in front of Phil's building. It wasn't far from Seb's  home. But it was far enough to bother him. 'I'll help you with your  bag.'

She raised a single brow. It was only the one pack but he was delaying the inevitable.

She rang the bell. 'I have a key if they're not home.'

Of course she did. But they were home. The footsteps came faster; Seb glared up at the security camera.

'Ana!'

It was Jack-Phil's partner. The most conservative-as-they-come  accountant you'd ever meet in your life. Older than Phil by a good ten  years, he was the anchor to the flamboyant interior-design genius who'd  just appeared in the doorway behind him.

'Darling.' Phil pushed past Jack and hauled Ana into his arms. 'I was beginning to think you'd been eaten by a crocodile.'

'Something like that.' Ana's tone was caustic.

'Seb.' Phil's eyes glinted as he tilted his head to see who was behind  her. 'The crocodile, I presume,' he added, closing the door behind them.

Ana turned, looked surprised to see Seb still standing there. 'What about the cab?'

'It can wait. The meter's still running.' He wasn't ready to leave yet.