His conscience piped up. Can you blame her?
He shoved aside that guilty thought. He was trying to help Skylar access a side of herself that scared her. He was trying to give them both a shot at real intimacy without barriers. He’d never do a blasted thing to hurt her and she knew it. She was just being stubborn. And controlling. Which brought him back to square one.
“Been a real baby explosion around here.”
“The McKay name ain’t gonna die out any time soon.” He smiled. “Except for our line, bein’s I have a girl.”
“So what’s it like, havin’ a kid?” Colt asked.
“Weird. Cool. Cool as hell, actually. Eliza is a lot of fun. She’s growin’ every damn day, which is a kick to watch. But she’s a lot of work, feedin’ her, changin’ her, and holdin’ her all the time. Mostly it don’t feel like work. I like doin’ it. When she looks at me…it’s like I want to do everything in my power to protect her and make her happy.” Funny. That’s how he felt about Skylar too. Still, at that honest admission, Kade braced himself for his brother and his cousin to rag on him about being baby-whipped, but they didn’t make a smart ass remark.
In fact, Colt said, “We gonna be hearin’ weddin’ bells soon?”
“They ain’t gonna be ringin’ for me.” He chugged the rest of his tea and passed the empty jar to Colt. “Later.” He climbed in his truck and went home.
The house was quiet. Skylar didn’t wait supper on him, although she’d left a plate in the refrigerator, which was so damn sweet it gave him a funny tickle in his chest. He ate the beef and mashed potatoes cold, barely tasting it. Damn lonely eating by himself. He’d gotten used to his family’s company in the last three weeks.
Kade showered. Checked on the baby and wandered downstairs. Skylar dozed on the couch. The baby monitor sat on the coffee table and the TV droned in the background. For some reason, an odd sense of peace filled him at the domestic scene. He snagged the remote and settled on the floor, not wanting to disturb her rest.
An hour or so later Sky stirred behind him.
“Hey. How long have you been home?”
“Couple hours. Before you ask, she’s fine. She’s still sleepin’.”
“I’m that predictable, huh?”
“No, you just think about her first. You’re a good mama, Sky.”
“You wouldn’t say that if you’d seen me earlier today.”
Kade turned around. Sky’s face was blotchy. Her usually sparkling eyes were a red-rimmed and sad. “Why? What happened?”
“Eliza screamed. I mean she really screamed. Literally for hours. I didn’t know what to do.” Skylar explained in such detail Kade found himself wincing at her obvious anxiety. She finished with, “When I fed her right before I tucked her in bed, that sweet baby girl just looked at me with those big blue eyes, like she was…disappointed in me for being such a bad mom.” A small hiccupping sob punctuated her distress.
“Ah, sweetheart. C’mere.” He crawled next to her on the couch, bringing her into his arms. Skylar curled her body into his and cried softly. He let her, even when it broke his damn heart. After she’d calmed down, he brushed his lips across the crown of her head. “Sorry you had a rough day. I expect Eliza Belle will give us both more than a few of ’em.”
She nodded against his chest.
As Kade ran his hands up and down her spine, he realized Skylar hadn’t granted him much opportunity to just hold her. To soothe her. She hadn’t shown her vulnerable side to him. Ever.
Now that she’d finally lowered her guard, his earlier demand of her total sexual submission made him feel like a fucking heel. Maybe if he didn’t bring it up again, she’d forget about it, allowing him to gentle her like he’d do with a skittish horse. Oh, he still craved her succulent body nine-ways-’til-Sunday, no doubt about that, but he wanted her heart too.
And that took time.
Good thing Kade was a patient man.
He closed his eyes and breathed her in, matching his exhalations to hers and floating off to sleep.
Hours later a wailing cry startled them both. Skylar groaned.
“Stay put, I’ll get her.” Kade fed Eliza and rocked her back to sleep. He couldn’t drum up the energy to climb the stairs so he nestled her in the bassinet. Then he snuggled behind Skylar on the couch, covering them with a blanket. He waited for Sky to wake up and protest, but she just burrowed deeper into his body and sighed.
Skylar woke with a start.
“Easy.” The warm body next to hers shifted. The very hard, very warm male body.