“Now class, I would like you to welcome back Alanna Hart. How are you feeling Alanna?” My face flushes hot and everyone in the class has turned to face me. I clear my throat and I awkwardly say.
“I am fine.” There are a few sniggers and I notice that a few groups of girls begin whispering amongst themselves. I try to hide my embarrassment but not with much success. I listen as hard as I can to everything Mr Hopkins is saying. My mind tends to flash back and forth to Adrian and I sometimes lose concentration. My eyes get hazy and my wound is beginning to ache. I grit my teeth from the pain and focus on my essay. I soon realise that I am not writing to my highest standards. My mind has been occupied with Adrian and everything that happened before the shooting. The break that I took in the middle of the semester is beginning to show. I do not know anything about this paper. I have missed so much schooling that I feel there is no way that I could graduate this year. I hate to think about failing and there is no way I want to do another year at college. I must focus completely on college right now; I could not cope with failing in college in the same way that I have failed in love.
The bell rings and it is not a moment too soon. I quickly grab my bag from the floor and pack my books. I begin to march out the door when Mr Hopkins asks me stay for a moment. I turn around and walk over to his desk. He signals for my essay and I reluctantly hand it over. He briefly smiles as he takes it from me. He does not say a word; he places his glasses on bridge of his long nose and begins to read over my essay. I stand patiently waiting to hear what his opinion will be. My eyes are blinking rapidly as he reads over the paper. He finally pulls his eyes from sheet.
“This is good, I am surprised.” I cannot believe his words, I am gobsmacked by them.
“I know that you have missed a lot of classes, but your work is good, Alanna.” I cannot contain my smile.
“I was worried that it wouldn’t be good enough. I know that I have missed a lot, but I am willing to put in the extra work. I would love to graduate this year.” He considers the paper again and I await his response.
“If all your work is like this, then I see no reason for you not to graduate.” I am ecstatic when I hear his words.
“Thanks, I will work extra hard.” I say beaming. He looks at me and says,
“I am sorry for your ordeal, it must have been horrendous.” I shift uneasily, I do not know why I act so strange whenever someone mentions the shooting. I try to hide my stress.
“It was horrible, but I now have to move on from it.” He nods in agreement. I smile again at Mr Hopkins and then I walk out of the classroom. I reach my room and I walk in to find Sophie and Katharine sitting on the bed. Sophie smiles when she sees me. However Katharine does not even look at me, instead she shifts nervously and diddles her foot against the bedframe. They look as if they were in deep conversation before I came in and I feel uncomfortable because I know that I was perhaps the topic of their discussion. I glance over at Sophie but I do not say a word. I throw my bag onto the dresser and I head for the bathroom. I rummage in my wash bags to find my pills. I take out two and I run myself a glass of water, I quickly swallow the pills and head back out into the room. Katharine and Sophie are again engaged in conversation; however, they quickly stop whatever they were saying as soon as I enter the room. It is clear to see that they are discussing me and I cannot say that I am not annoyed with them. I walk over to my bed and carefully sit down; I lay back and rest my head against the soft pillow. I do not look at the girls; I stare up at the ceiling and wonder what they are discussing. My mind is overflowing with every thought possible. I listen to them talk and I cannot believe their cheek. They do not even acknowledge that I am here and I am stunned by their arrogance. I look over at them for a split second and I catch Sophie glaring at me.
“Alanna, how was class.” She finally says. I manage to say,
“Good actually,”
“That’s wonderful; did you have any pain today?” She says looking concerned. “I am in pain right now, I wasn’t all day but I think that sitting around brought it on. I took two pills so hopefully that will help.” I say only looking at Sophie. Sophie sighs and I can see that this is a strain on her. It must be hard to see your two best friends arguing. I would hate it if I were in that situation. I feel that I want to work things out with Katharine. However, this awkwardness proves to me that I cannot.
“This has gone on long enough.” Sophie says and I feel surprised by her forwardness. I look to Katharine but she still has not said a word and there is no way that I will be first one to talk. Sophie gets up from the bed and walks over to sit my bedside. She leans closer to me and whispers,