Rose, I’m so tempted, but would it make me feel miserable all over again? He’s already hinted that it could become a regular arrangement (his girlfriend thinks he goes out to play darts every Friday night, but he doesn’t).
Help me, please. What should I do?
Julia
Dear Julia,
You sound strong to me. Your ex-husband sounds weak. He knocked your self-confidence and it took a while for you to get back on your feet.
Now, I’m sure most advice-givers would tell you to turn him down flat because you’re better than he is and he doesn’t deserve the opportunity to hurt you again. Nor does he deserve sex.
This is all true, but I think you do deserve sex. You deserve closure. He took your love life away from you without warning. If you can make a pact with yourself that it will only happen once, I really do think you should sleep with him for that one last time. Then, afterwards, tell him it’s over for good. Use him like he hoped to use you. Get your own back on him and grow in confidence as a result. You already know he’s a pathetic excuse for a man and you deserve better. Hammer that last nail into the coffin of your relationship. It’s what Madonna would do, isn’t it? Oh, and make sure he uses a condom too.
Do the unexpected, be amazing and surprise yourself. Set yourself free.
Then move on triumphantly with your new life!
Love,
Rose xxx
‘Spot on. Couldn’t agree more,’ announced Margot, having finished reading. ‘What a snake. Get your own back on him, girl!’ Her dark eyes were glittering. ‘Can’t beat a bit of closure.’
‘I hope we get an update.’ Flo was watering the house plants lined up along the windowsill of Margot’s apartment; sometimes people got back in touch to let Rose and her readers know what was now happening in their lives.
‘Sooner rather than later, preferably. Don’t want to pop my clogs and still be waiting to hear how she’s doing.’ Margot tilted her head to one side like a bird, surveying Flo with interest. ‘Have you had a haircut?’
‘Just a trim.’
‘And a colour?’
‘Semi-permanent. It’s called Autumn Leaves.’ Pleased, Flo swished her ringlets from side to side. ‘D’you like it?’
‘I do, very much. And you’ve had your eyebrows tinted too.’
‘It was the hairdresser’s idea.’
‘Nice. This is for a special occasion, I take it.’
‘Possibly.’ Flo smiled and put down the watering can.
‘Your chap back from Toronto at last, is he?’
My chap . . .
‘His plane landed this morning. I’m seeing him tonight.’
Margot said, ‘D’you suppose he’ll have had his eyebrows tinted to impress you too?’
‘His are black already.’ Unable to help herself, Flo said, ‘Honestly, you should see them. He has amazing eyebrows.’
‘Ah, look at you. You’re glowing.’ Margot added cheerfully, ‘And you’re lovely too, never forget that. He’s a lucky chap.’
‘Hi,’ said Zander when Flo pulled open the front door.
‘Hi.’ Was she beaming like an idiot? Oh, but it was so wonderful to see him again.
‘I’m back.’
‘I noticed.’
He was nodding admiringly. ‘You look great.’
‘Thanks. I had my eyebrows tinted and I’m still getting used to them. Every time I catch sight of myself in the mirror I get a shock.’ OK, babbling now, time to stop before she heard herself blurting out that she’d had her legs waxed too.
‘I like your eyebrows.’ Zander was smiling. ‘I like you. I’ve missed you.’
His words made her quiver; it was the perfect thing to say. Her skin prickling with anticipation, she breathed in the scent of Zander’s body, his aftershave, his leather jacket. And then he kissed her and all was right with the world . . .
Well, almost all.
Drawing away a minute later, she rested her hands on his shoulders. ‘Sorry, but I have to ask. Have you spoken to Lena yet?’
‘Yes. She told me what happened last week. Was it awful?’
‘Put it this way, she’s not happy with me. Is Giles her new boyfriend?’
Zander looked resigned. ‘Seems like it.’
‘He’s pretty ghastly.’
‘Ah well, that’s my sister for you. Line up a row of potential men and you can guarantee Lena’ll go for the most obnoxious one. It’s like a moth to a flame.’
‘Did she manage to lock herself out of the flat while you were away?’
Zander grimaced. ‘A couple of times. I had to leave spare keys with all the neighbours. Anyway, can we not talk about my sister just now? I’ve been looking forward to this evening. Let’s not spoil it.’