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Thoughtful(35)

By:S.C. Stephens


Seeing how they’d cut me out of their existence had been a bigger hit to the gut than every kick from Dad’s steel-toed boot. I’d wanted to cry, I’d wanted to vomit. What I’d ended up doing was putting every piece of furniture they’d owned on the side of the road with a FREE sign on it. By the time I was done removing any trace of them, the house had been as empty as I was.

I heard a knock on my door and looked up to see Kiera standing there. Pushing aside my dark memories, I waved her in.

She cringed a little when she spoke, which made a cute wrinkle form on the top of her nose. “Hey…sorry about the stuff. If you don’t like it, I can take it down.”

She looked so apologetic as she sat down beside me, like she’d truly done something wrong. But all she’d done was add a little…life…to my life. “No, it’s fine. I guess it was a little…empty.” To say the least. I pointed over at the Ramones picture behind me. “I do like that…thanks.” I more than like it. And thanks isn’t enough, but it’s all I can give you.

“Yeah, I thought you might…you’re welcome.” Her beautiful smile shifted to a frown. “You okay?” she asked, her brows bunched like she was actually worried about me.

Was she concerned over me? All she’d seen was me staring at the floor for a second. What did she think she saw? “Yeah, I’m fine…why?”

Again, she seemed embarrassed, like she was infringing on my privacy. “Nothing, you just looked…nothing, sorry.”

Remembering all the times she hadn’t pried when she could have, remembering how opening up to her just a small fraction had felt nice before it had hurt, I considered telling her what I was thinking about when she’d walked in. There was no way I could though. It wasn’t something simple that could be explained with a line or two. No, to explain just how much what she’d done meant to me, I’d have to explain everything. And I couldn’t. It wasn’t a story I told people about.

Instead of telling her what I was sure she wanted to hear, I smiled and asked, “Hungry? How about Pete’s?” Amused, I added, “It’s been so long since we’ve been there.”

Once we were at Pete’s we settled down at the band’s table and placed our order with Jenny. People were staring at the pair of us together, but I ignored them. I was having a meal with my roommate. That was all.

Kiera was usually fine when it was the two of us, but sometimes she could slip into funks. “Denny depressions,” I called them. While we waited for our food to arrive, I watched the perkiness on her face shift to sullenness. She was missing him.

Even though I knew what was wrong with her, I asked if she was all right. She shrugged it off, shaking her head and sitting up taller as she said she was fine, but I could see that it was all for show. Her heart was aching, and she was lonely. I could understand loneliness. I wished there were more I could do for her, but I wasn’t the one she was yearning for, so my help was limited. I was a patch, something to help suppress the sadness. That was okay. At least I was useful.





Chapter 7





Promise Made, Promise Almost Kept




It had been several weeks since Denny had left Seattle, but the time had flown by. For me, anyway. One thing I’d begun to notice was the fact that Denny was calling less and less frequently. I didn’t mention my concerns to Kiera, but it was starting to bother me. Mainly because it bothered her. I saw the disappointment on her face. It was like watching a sculpture getting chipped apart piece by piece. If Denny didn’t shape up soon, he was going to have a problem on his hands that had nothing to do with his unfounded fears about me.

I talked to him sometimes, when he’d call the house while Kiera was gone. “So, how is Tucson treating you?” I asked him one afternoon.

He laughed. “It’s a hell of a lot hotter than Seattle, but I like it. How are things there?”

“Good. No worries here.” I’m keeping my promise.

He let out an exhale that was saturated with relief. “That’s good. I’d hate for there to be…problems…while I wasn’t around.”

My jaw clenched, wondering if that was a vague warning to me. He had nothing to worry about, seriously. Kiera wasn’t even interested in me. All she ever thought about was Denny.

Clearing my throat, I redirected my thoughts. “I’ve noticed you haven’t been calling as much. Any problems on your end?” See, I can ask vague questions with hidden meanings too.

Denny was silent for several seconds. He was a smart guy, so I knew he understood what I was really asking. He was either shocked that I would go there, or he was debating how to answer me. My stomach churned at the idea of Denny possibly straying on Kiera. Would I tell her if he had? I already knew I would. Withholding the truth from Kiera wasn’t something I ever wanted to do.