She wasn’t saying it as directly as I had…but I understood. She did love me. She didn’t want to, but she did, and she didn’t want to fight it anymore. She was mine. Finally.
Chapter 26
Here’s My Heart
I moved over her again, returned my mouth to hers. I kissed her with everything I had, my entire soul, but still…I held a part of me back. She could change her mind at any second. She could crush me with a word. I wanted to be prepared for her rejection; maybe then it wouldn’t hurt so much.
My body trembled with restraint, and every place she touched me burned with painful need. She was everything I wanted, everything I needed, everything I hoped for. She ran her fingers down my back, then swept my shirt over my head. I ran my fingers up her skin, taking her shirt with them. I wanted us to be laid bare, no barriers between us. Not anymore. But I didn’t want to spook Kiera, so I kept my movements teasingly slow.
Her fingers caressed my bare back, then swept along my side, to the scar I had along my ribs from when I had protected her. The healing wound was a small price to pay for her. I’d gladly pay it again. More if I had to. I’d give my life for her.
I felt her exposed shoulders, let the pads of my fingers run across her bra and down to her waist. I wanted so much more, but I didn’t know if she was ready. I didn’t know if she’d 100 percent meant what she’d said.
Shifting my weight, I brought my hands to the waistband of her jeans. I desperately wanted this, but I couldn’t handle another no. I’d explode. I needed some sort of assurance from her that this was okay. As if she heard my musings, Kiera whispered, “I’m yours…don’t stop.”
Her hips wriggled in a way that let me know, without a doubt, that she wanted this. She was mine. I had nothing to fear. There wouldn’t be a rejection this time.
With a relieved exhale, I began working on her jeans in earnest. Yes, this was going to happen. We were going to give ourselves to each other. Everything was going to be fine.
Kiera unfastened my jeans while I did hers. Once hers were undone, I started pulling them off her. Adoration radiating from my chest in waves of happiness, I murmured, “Kiera, I love you,” then placed a soft kiss on her neck.
As I was nuzzling against her neck, I heard her quiet voice, “Kellan, wait…just a min—”
I didn’t even let her finish saying our code phrase for “back off.” “Kiera…” I groaned. Disappointment warred with grief in my body as I relaxed my hold on her jeans and slumped against her. Had she really done this to me again? “Oh…my…God. Are you serious?” I rocked my head against her shoulder; at the same time I was both shocked and not surprised at all. “Please don’t do this again. I can’t take it.”
Her voice was apologetic, but firm. “No, I’m not…but—”
Incredulous, I lifted my head to look at her. “But?” The sudden stop in the proceedings was starting to give me a stomachache. It was an ache I was getting all too familiar with when it came to Kiera. Irritation boiled a path through my disappointment. “You do realize that if you keep doing this to my body, I will never be able to have children?”
Kiera pressed her lips together, but she couldn’t stop the giggle that escaped. Pulling back to look at her, I frowned. I really hadn’t been kidding. “I’m glad you find that funny…”
Still laughing, humor and happiness lightening her eyes to a peaceful shade of sea-green, she ran a finger down my cheek and said, “If we are going to do this…if I’m going to be with you…it’s not going to be on the floor in the back room of Pete’s.”
Her eyes scanned the area and I relaxed. She wasn’t rejecting me, just our current location, and I could understand that. This wasn’t exactly the most romantic, or comfortable, place in the world. I could wait to be with her again, but I couldn’t resist a chance to tease her.
With a soft kiss, I whispered, “Now you object to being with me on a dirty floor?” Giving her a fake frown that I hoped was charming, I added, “Did you…did you just get me to pour my heart out to you…so you could get me naked again?”
Kiera laughed, then gently grabbed my face. “God, I missed you. I missed that.”
Content, I stroked her stomach as I gazed at her. “Missed what?”
“You…your humor, your smile, your touch, your…everything.”
There was so much tenderness in her voice, it seared me. “I missed you so much, Kiera.”
I watched the emotions sliding over her face, then I leaned down and kissed her. An idea struck me and I pulled back to look at her with a playful grin. “You know…there are other options for this room besides the floor.”