Her fingers reached up to grab my face. “Don’t leave me. You are mine…and I’m yours. I want you…and you can have me. Just stop being with all those—”
My guard up, I pulled away. So that was what this was about? “No. I won’t be with you because you’re jealous.”
Her hands returned to my skin, pulling my face down again. Mimicking a move that I had done on her before, she slid her tongue under and along my upper lip. I shivered in delight. She felt so good. No. Yes. “Kiera…no. Don’t do this to me again…”
Kiera paused with her mouth almost touching mine. “I’m not, Kellan. I’m sorry I pushed you away before, but I’m not saying no anymore.” Her tongue returned to my lip while my mind spun. She wasn’t saying no? I could have her? Whenever I wanted? What about Denny? Could I handle sharing her with him? Yes. Not being with her was worse than any other fate I could think of.
When her tongue was only halfway along my lip, I crashed my mouth down to hers. God, she tasted good, felt good, smelled good. I’d missed this so much. A nagging thought picked at my mind as our mouths moved together. I stopped kissing her and pulled back to look at her. What am I doing? My breath became shallow and fast as I made a split-second decision. If she was going to do this with me, then she was going to know the truth. She was going to know how I felt about her. I couldn’t let her believe this was a casual fling, that this was just sex to me. It went so much deeper than that. There was no casual here. I was all in, and she needed to know that.
Terrified of the words I’d never spoken to another human being before, I whispered, “I’m in love with you.” She started interrupting me, but I didn’t let her get very far. If I didn’t say this now, I never would.
Bringing my hand up to her cheek, I gave her a kiss as tender as my words. “I’m so in love with you, Kiera. I’ve missed you so much. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I say awful things to you. I’m sorry I lied about your sister…I never touched her. I promised you I wouldn’t. I couldn’t let you know…how much I adore you…how much you hurt me.”
With each word I spoke, the next word was easier. Before I knew it, I was rambling in between brief, heartfelt kisses. “I love you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. The women…I was so scared to touch you. You didn’t want me…I couldn’t take the pain. I tried to get over you. Every time with them, I was with you. I’m so sorry…I love you.”
I didn’t know if I was getting through to her. I didn’t know if I was making sense, but I needed her forgiveness. I’d done so much wrong. “Forgive me…please. I tried to forget you. It didn’t work…I just wanted you more. God, I’ve missed you. I’m sorry I hurt you. I’ve never wanted anyone like I want you. Every girl is you to me. You’re all I see…you’re all I want. I want you so much. I want you forever. Forgive me…I love you so much.”
Kiera’s breath increased, and our kisses became heated, intense and passionate, just like everything about us. “God, I love you. I need you. Forgive me. Stay with me. Say you need me too. Say you want me too. Please…be mine.”
Reality snapped back into me as I begged for her love. She’d been silent this entire time. She hadn’t said a word in response, besides my name. What did that mean? Was she okay with what I was saying? Was she surprised how much I cared about her? Was she ambivalent? Did she care about me at all? What was she thinking…?
“Kiera…?”
She tried to speak, but no words came out. Calming herself, she closed her eyes. I could see the tears squeezing through her eyelashes, but I didn’t know what that meant either. She didn’t say anything for a long time, and she didn’t open her eyes. I guess that was my answer. She didn’t feel what I felt. She didn’t love me. I’d poured my heart out for nothing. No, not for nothing. I’d opened myself up to someone, and I’d never done that before. That had to count for something.
I pulled away from her and her eyes finally opened. She grabbed my arm, stopping me. I felt my eyes stinging as I looked down at her. Was this the moment she broke my heart again? Could I stomach it? I really didn’t feel like I could. A tear in my eye trickled down my skin. Kiera brushed it away, then cupped my cheek and pulled me closer. Our lips met, and my heart soared and cracked.
“Kiera…” I pulled away. I needed words from her right now, not actions.
Her eyes were as wet as mine as she stared up at me. She swallowed a harsh lump in her throat, then she finally spoke. “You were always right—we’re not friends. We’re so much more. I want to be with you, Kellan. I want to be yours. I am yours.”