She walks past us and sits at the bar, right next to Summer. Great.
“You never came to see me,” I tell her, getting straight to the point. She tries to look down so I gently lift her chin up with my thumb. “Why?” She mumbles something I don’t hear. “What did you say?”
“I said, I’m scared,” she says, so softly that I have to strain to hear her.
“You don’t need to be scared, beautiful,” I tell her. It kills me that she feels like this, but I know if she gives me the chance, I can fix our marriage. “I want nothing as much as I want you, Tay. I’m not going to mess anything up this time. You need to give me a chance to prove myself,” I tell her. She licks her bottom lip, before giving me a slight nod. I exhale heavily, feeling relief and hope pour through my system.
“You won’t regret it,” I tell her, before kissing her gently. I take her hand into mine, intertwining our fingers and walk her back to her seat. Reid has served Mia her drink, and is leaning over the bar talking with Summer, their foreheads almost touching.
“You want me to take you home?” I ask her.
“Are you going now?” she asks, and I nod. “I’ll come with you.” It feels like Christmas morning. We say our byes and I walk her to my bike. I pick her up by her curvy hips and place her on, putting the helmet over her head. The curls sticking out from underneath make me smile. Nothing can fully contain that hair of hers. I slide my leg over and hop on. Taiya holds on tight, her arms around my stomach, gripping onto my abs. I have one last thought before I ride off.
This is exactly where I’m meant to be.
*****
“I thought you were taking me home,” she says as we walk into my apartment.
“I am,” I reply, closing the door behind us. She spins around to face me, studying me for a moment.
“You really want to make our marriage work?”
“More than anything,” I tell her, taking her by the hand and leading her to my bedroom. I turn the knob, opening the door, then pick her up and carry her to my bed. Laying her down gently, I lean down and take off her shoes for her, putting them neatly in the corner of the room. I take off my own, and then jump into bed with her. We lay side by side, both staring at the ceiling. I reach out and grab her hand with mine, absently drawing circles with my thumb on her palm.
“Do you believe me?” I ask. She knows exactly what I’m referring too.
“Yes, I do.”
“But?” I ask, sensing her hesitation.
“It’s not as simple as that, is it?” No, I guess it isn’t.
“Are you ready to listen?” I ask her. She nods, turning on her side to face me. So I tell her. I tell her how I went to see my father, all the things he said to me. How he told me I was a coward. How I will never be the man Reid is. I tell her how the night Reid got his scar, he was defending our mother from our father, and how I was too scared to do anything about it. Reid’s scar is proof of his courage, and of my cowardice. It’s my shame to bear, and I’ll live with that for the rest of my life.
Who the fuck would marry you, son? She’s going to figure out you’re worthless sooner or later.
“Ryan, you were a kid,” she says, squeezing my hand. I shrug, because really that isn’t an excuse. Not in my eyes.
“When I got back home, Sarah was waiting at the door. She said she was there looking for you. I let her in, and then she started hitting on me. I was numb. I wasn’t thinking. She kissed me, and yes, I kissed her back. It was different. Not even good different, just different.” I clear my throat, not wanting to continue, but knowing I have to. “She took her top off, and I knew that it wasn’t what I wanted, or who I wanted. I told her to get dressed and get out. Instead, she threw herself on me and that’s when you walked in. The look on your face. I couldn’t believe what I was doing, Tay. You were and are everything to me. I don’t know what was wrong with me. I was such a fuck up, just like he said.” I look over at her to see her staring into space, her face expressionless. “I’m so fucking sorry, Tay.”
“So, would you have continued if I didn’t walk in?” she asks, her voice small. I bring her fingers to my lips and kiss them.
“No, Tay. No,” I tell her, my eyes pleading with hers to believe me. “And then you left me. You just left, without letting me explain.”
“I need some time to think,” she says, sliding off the bed and standing up. She grabs her shoes and then walks out without looking back.
But what did I expect?
I just told her in detail what happened between her ex-best friend and me.