This Man(174)

He leaves me on the unit to turn the shower on. I fall into a daydream, just watching the muscles of his back ripple with his movements.

‘In you get.’ He holds his hand out. I slide off the unit, taking his hand and letting him lead me into the shower. ‘It kills me to do this.’ he sighs, taking the natural sponge.

‘What?’ I hold his shoulder as he kneels in front of me, working up my legs to the insides of my thighs in slow, soapy circles.

‘I hate washing myself off of you.’ His face is sorrowful. He really means it?

I stand, letting him clean all the traces of him away from me, working carefully, lovingly and flicking me small smiles when he catches me watching him. My hair is shampooed and conditioned, and I take the sponge to return the favour. It takes me a lot longer with his body being a lot bigger than mine, my task hindered further by my need to kiss every square inch of him. He lets me have my way, smiling down at me and squirting more shower gel on the sponge when I hold it out. As normal, I linger over his scar, hoping he will open up to me, but he doesn’t… again. One day, I tell myself – when, I don’t know. Perhaps this will all be over before I ever do know. The thought depresses me. I never want this to be over.

I’m wrapped up in a soft, white towel, showered with light kisses all over my face before he tucks me under his arm and walks us into the bedroom.

‘Put lace on.’ he says softly, making his way into the wardrobe and appearing a few minutes later in some green, striped lounge pants. I smile. I love him in sludgy green. ‘I’ll meet you in the kitchen. Deal?’

‘Deal,’ I confirm quietly. He winks, striding out of the bedroom, leaving me to find my lace. I was actually thinking more along the lines of big knickers and a cosy sweatshirt, but he’s in too good a mood to break it over such a minor detail. Where would my underwear be, anyway? And would Kate have packed lace?

I look around the room for any signs of my bags, seeing nothing. Wandering into the wardrobe, I only find my dresses and shoes. He said a few days. There’s more than a few days’ worth of clothes in here, all hanging neatly in their own little space. I smile at the thought of Jesse making a little gap for me in his vast wardrobe. Did he unpack my things?

I pad back out to one of the two chests of drawers I had made in Italy. Pulling open the first drawer, I find three neat piles of boxer shorts, in black, white and grey – all Armani. They look brand new. I work my way to the next drawer, finding dress socks. Does he have them ironed? I open another to discover belts – all coiled neatly, in every shade of black and brown leather you could imagine.

He’s a neat freak. Oh, this is bad news! I’m shockingly untidy at home. I shut the drawer, opening the last one, but all I find are sports socks and various caps. I proceed to open every drawer on the other chest – all occupied with an array of running shorts and vests.

Giving up and with my towel still wrapped around me, I make my way downstairs to the kitchen, finding Jesse with his head in the fridge.

‘I can’t find my stuff.’ I inform the fridge door.

His head pops up from behind the fridge, his eyes running up and down my towel clad body. ‘I’ll take naked.’ he says, shutting the door and sauntering over to me with a jar of peanut butter. ‘Cathy’s off and the fridge is empty. I’ll order in, what do you fancy?’

‘You,’ I grin.

He smiles, reaches forward and whips the towel off, throwing it to the side and running his appreciative gaze down my naked body. ‘Your God needs to feed his temptress.’ He flashes his dancing eyes to mine. ‘The rest of your stuff is in that dirty great big wooden truck that you had dumped in my bedroom. What do you want to eat?’

I ignore him and shrug. I could eat anything. ‘I’m easy.’

‘I know, but what do you want to eat?’

I must stop saying that. ‘I’m only easy with you.’ I grumble. He thinks I’m easy?

‘You fucking better be. Now, tell me, what do you want to eat?’

‘I like anything, you choose. What time is it, anyway?’ I’ve lost all concept of time. In fact, I lose all concept of everything when I’m with him.

‘Seven, go and dry your hair before I abandon dinner and take you again.’ He turns me around, smacking my backside to send me on my way.

I take my naked body back up the stairs to fulfill his instructions. When I reach the top and take a left to the Master suite, I glance down and see Jesse stood by the archway to the kitchen, quietly watching me. I blow him a kiss as I disappear into the bedroom, just catching a glimpse of his knee trembling smile as he vanishes from view.